Gift lists. Discuss

[wedontplaywithelectrics]

I've always struggled with this. Hubby's family are big fans of Gift Lists for their children's birthdays and Christmas. I personally am not a fan. But,get this: the adults are all at it to,writing lists of goods they want with the expectation that siblings/adult children will buy said items. I find it not only incredibly rude but vulgar. My son will be two this year. How do I protect him from this selfish,prescriptive attitude towards birthdays and Christmas. As I have "married into the family" it's an expectation that I join the masses :-(

Well, I do have an Amazon list - mainly books. It's a good idea as I have so many and relatives can see what I'd really like. I don't expect them I get anything from it - I don't expect anything so hinga are always air ku surprise.

We intend to get DS to write a list to Santa - but explain that he won't get everything - it's just so Santa aka us! knows what he likes. Same way DH & I were brought up.

But... if it's a family tradition then you might be stuck

Be the lone wolf odd DiL!

It's fair enough to be able to tell someone who asks what DC might like, but if making a list isn't something you want in your nuclear family, don't do it. Handy if DH agrees, though.

Yes, I think I may have to declare my nuclear family as a rogue state!

my DHs family are like this - have always asked for birthday lists/christmas lists for DC/us and whilst I don't like it much I've accepted it and we all have amazon lists - too many misinterpreted XYZ / duplications from a suggested list over the years - it makes it much easier for everyone.

Having a lisr doesn't mean you have to use it - I frequently buy off list - but it's great for ideas - and if you've more than one DC stops duplication of stuff too.

also means you get to guide what ds gets rather than too much disney/plastic crap so can be all organic and melissa and doug!

My DH and his family want lists. It means they get exactly what they want. Their thinking is that the people around the Christmas tree are going to buy each other a gift, so why be coy? They ask for each other's Lists and nag until they get given one. I thought this was dreadful at first, but actually now I really love it - you know that they get what they really want, they enjoy the compiling-a-list process, and there's no expectation to either (a) be given everything on it, or (b) for their to be no deviations.
There's no way my DD is writing a list - her parents will do it instead....