Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

Flip

Original poster

Kids presents when you don't talk to the parents

5 replies

ALittleBitOfMagic · 09/09/2012 08:53

Will try to keep this as short as possible don't want to get bogged down on the actual feud - that I have made my peace with .

My family pretty much split down the middle one half now no longer speaks to the other . I still send the kids birthday and Christmas presents . Two of the three the still sends DD .

However , I am due dc2 soon and I am debating whether to accept gifts from them assuming I will be sent any (I'm not so sure tbh) . I sometimes feel hypocritical accepting gifts for DD but she had been getting them before and she at least knows who they are from . But the new dc will never know them they will be strangers . Wwyd?

OP posts:

ll31 · 09/09/2012 11:25

why would u want your second child to feel diff than ur first. also surely not accepting presents would aggravate situation

fairyfriend · 09/09/2012 11:28

I never see the point of trying to keep a relationship with the kids when the adults don't have one. In a relatively short time they'll be grown up with opinions of their own. And they won't want a relationship with someone who hates their mum.
Sad but true.

Original poster

ALittleBitOfMagic · 09/09/2012 11:31

Thats my exact dilemma I don't want the second child being different but then I don't want empty material things from people who don't want to be in their lives .

It sticks in my throat to accept things for DD but she is 7 and one of the kids (13 with ASD) comes to me regularly and he brings the presents i can't tell him I'm not accepting them it's too heartbreaking .

OP posts:

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about this subject:

Families

Alliwantisaroomsomewhere · 09/09/2012 19:21

Can you actually decline presents if they are not for you? The gifts are for your children, not you, don't you think?

Horrible dilemma to be in. But if you find it hard accepting the gifts, it may make it easier knowing that they are not for you but for your kids.

G1nger · 10/09/2012 19:52

I decline presents from the relative I've cut out. Her daughters know we have no relationship and never will, while I'm able to still have relationships with them because they don't live with her. If they did live with her, I wouldn't know or send presents to them. I suggest you do the same. It's all very pointless, isn't it.

Flip