Help please! My nan is dying

[LeChatteRouge]

I got a message on Facebook. By the wife of a family member. I don't know these people. I have not seen my nan for 7 years. My dad and her fell out. I don't know why. Just after they did I moved away. To get away from xh because of dv. I just lost contact with her. This message said they are trying to get hold of my dad as my nan is dying. They gave me a number of a family member to past on to my dad. They only message me because I am the only one on Facebook. I don't know what my dad is going to do. But it sounds like his not going to do anything.

I have spoke to my brother. Who is the only that lives in the same area. I asked him if he wants to see her. He said his not sure. We feel like they contact my dad not us.

Will we even be welcome. I really don't know what to do.

I expect your Nan has asked for you dad. The prospect of death gives you some perspective I guess. I know I'd be heartbroken if I didn't see the kid for 7 years before I died.

That's not to say she won't want to see you too, but your dad is her baby. Of course he's the one she's asked for.

I never looked at it like that. But what if she didn't ask for anyone and it's the family member that thinks he should be told. I don't know why they fell out but what if none of us are welcome?

I'd suggest you get in touch with whoever Facebooked you and ask what your Nan wants. I would certainly pass the message on to your Dad to give him the chance to make his own mind up what's best to do.

If you are not made welcome, then so be it. But you'll have a long, long time to regret not going and seeing. My Father died recently and even though we had a good enough relationship, we still left plenty unsaid. I will regret it forever and it is making my days so much harder to endure.

Dad wrote me a letter given to me the morning after he died and even though it was a warm loving message, it makes me feel worse because we couldn't say these things to each other.

So go. Maybe send a message asking first. But don't do nothing. Love to you...

My brother thinks we should phone the number that they left for my dad. It's my nan sister number? It was here dil that contacted me. I am guessing she don't have Facebook

If you feel you want to see your nan then phone the number. You may regret not trying to see her. You seeing her may even get your dad round to the idea of seeing her. I agree, things left unsaid just leave you with questions. Better to try if you want to.

Pass on the details. That is all.