Need to go away to support frined, but dd may/may not be getting chicken pox...

[realhousewifeofdevoncounty]

A good friend has recently split from her dh and is devastated. I said I'd go and stay with her (she lives far away) this weekend as he has just moved out.

I'd have to take DD with me as DP works at weekends.

DD (15 months) had a bit of a high temp and cold symptoms on Sunday and Monday, I did warn my friend but said I'd see how she is. She seemed to get better and though still sniffly with a lingering cough, she was back at the childminders yesterday, so I told my friend we were back on. However when I dropped her off this morning, the childminder says another one of the girls she has has got chicken pox, and whilst her mum was now keeping her off, I suspect the damage has been done, and it's just a matter off time before my dd erupts!

WWYD if she does get spots? I've asked my friend and she has already had them (as have I), and DD already seems better "in herself" IYSWIM. My friend has already said not to worry about coming up if she's ill, but I feel she does need me atm.

What are the "rules" re. chicken pox? Are you supposed to stay "confined" or just away from other children? This is all hypothetical anyway as she might not even get them, but I'm guessing it's likely she will!

Just to bump and update, she has just texted me asking can I let her know asap if I'll definitely be coming so she can make other plans, which I kind of get as she doesn't want to on her own, so shall I just tell her no?

If your DD has chicken pox you are supposed to stay confined so you don't accidently infect someone who is pregnant or has low immunity.
However it can be up to 15 days between exposure and the spots appearing so I don't think it is practical to quarantine yourself at every exposure until you are sure your DD actually has chickenpox.

My DD has been in prolonged close contact with children who went on to develop chicken pox twice now and had cold symptoms but never actually came down with chicken pox on both occasions.

The first time it happened I kept her in for 2 long weeks to be safe. The second time I warned the people that I was visiting to give them the chance to cancel and went about my business as usual because 2 weeks is a long time to stay at home just in case.

If you were planning on driving to your friends and then staying in it would be a moot point anyway because theres no-one else to infect. I would go unless you think your DD is too poorly to cope with the visit.

I'd go. You've cleared it with your friend, you're not planning on hanging around mothercare or antenatal clinics, and you can always bottle it and go home if things change. Just take calpol and your own towels.

I know there have been bitter debates on here about the ethics of taking a child who may have chickenpox out, but it just isn't practical to stay in for weeks - you often have no idea that your DC is going to come down with it. Respect to gamerwidow, but (in my case) with 2 other DC to ferry to school, nursery etc and a job to hold down, you can't stop the world in case something happens later.

Ta. Just told my friend we'll be coming unless she is desperately ill, and she's dead chuffed! Hopefully she won't get it, though might not be such a bad thing if she gets it now before she's at school!