anonymous support and advice?

[Feckittyfeck]

I am a regular poster who comes here for the fun and chats -bunfights- but also on occassion to moan about real-life stuff -dh- and so on.

After an incident where something I wrote about someone in my extended family was emailed to them by a mumsnetter -wanting to create a shitstorm- who recognised me (still don't know who), I have been quite careful about what I say and have changed names to post personal stuff. I asked for some support recently and a lovely friend of mine contacted me off board to talk to me about it, trouble is I had changed my name so my posting style is obviously really identifiable to those who know me .

I always felt quite free to post how I felt on here and was never knowingly malicious towards real life people - you know, it was basic 'dh did this, MIL said that' type stuff. However now I feel like I have to change details in everything I post so that I am less identifiable, so MIL might become an Aunty or my child's age might be slightly changed.

Anyway -to the point.... It's really pissing me off and I feel like I should just excercise my right to seek advice knowing that it's never going to be truely anonymous. I want to have a huge moan about something going on in my life but can't because it may get out, but I want advice too. Meh.

Would you completely change details or just change your name and to hell with it - hope that no one makes the connection?

oh - strikeout fail! doh

bunfights dh and so on.

I always change bits and bobs to make sure I don't get identified after it happened to me on another forum with very unpleasant outcomes. I also NC regularly.

FWIW I don't recognise you from your posting style and I spend a fair bit of time on here

I wouldn't recognise you from your posting style either. Are you sure the lovely friend isn't stalking you, and sent the email?

In answer to your q, I just name change occasionally and hope for the best. But I wouldn't put anything on here that I wouldn't say to someone's face after a spectacularly bad incident a few yeas ago Perhaps I should be more circumspect.

Blimey, why on earth would someone be so malicious to message your family?? Even if you did, by pure chance, recognise a poster, that's a big line to cross.

I also think someone would have to be here a lot to recognise a posting style after a nc, and how awful you have to now be so paranoid about it, especially as the person hasn't even identified themselves.

You're right to change details though. They are private problems made public and there are so many more lurkers than posters here (I usually read more than log on tbh ). It's not fair that some people are so underhand that you have to change, but it's just the way it is, I think.