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To have or not have a another baby?

5 replies

minxer73 · 22/11/2011 10:21

My husband has just admitted that he would like another baby-after almost writing the idea off for the last year and a half. I had convinced myself that I too didn't want another one- I made lots of reasons up-but deep down I know it would be lovely to have another so that my daughter has a brother or sister. I also know that we would have enough energy and love to give to another baby.

The problem is we live in a 2 bedroom terraced house- and the small bedroom is just about big enough for our daughter-it's a box room. The house is tiny- whenever we have washing to dry in the house it takes over the whole house!!
My daughter's things have taken over the house, which we don't mind- but we have had to sacrifice chucking out a lot of our things to make room.

Then there is the question of moving-we can't- we are in a fixed mortgage for the next 3/4 years so we wouldn't beable to move until my D is in full time ed (she's 2 now).

I am 38 and time is ticking away-but I can't stand the thought of having to make do with no room to swing a cat in and 2 children running around in it! We are almost at the point of giving up on the idea of another baby-but is there anything else we might be able to do? My husband and I are both teachers- I am part time. We are not rolling in money-we're just about doing ok now after the last few years- but the mortgage, childcare and our loan we pay off every month takes up most of our wages.

Any thoughts on this?

OP posts:
minxer73 · 22/11/2011 10:22

apologies for the "a another baby" !!

OP posts:
Iggly · 22/11/2011 10:28

Well space wise - can you fit a cot in, get a tumble dryer and get rid of more stuff? I shared a bedroom with my brother until 7/8. Small kids only need small beds - toys etc can go elsewhere.

Could you move in a few years? Don't quote me - sone mortgages I think can be ported to other properties but there are obvious costs.

Can you afford maternity leave again?

minxer73 · 22/11/2011 10:41

I have thought of the q of maybe extending the house- adding a conservatory onto the kitchen which is at the back of the house overlooking the long garden we have. We could extend upstairs for another bedroom. I have no idea what the costs would be.

Yes, I could afford maternity leave again, just about. My husband is good with working out the money side of things.

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Iggly · 22/11/2011 12:58

Well I think you might be alright then - have your neighbours extended? Can you get builders over for rough approximation? TBH it sounds like you just need to make the final decision then make the adjustments.

minxer73 · 22/11/2011 21:32

I think we have made the decision - not to have another child. My husband and I weighed up our circumstances this eve- our life is good at the mo and living in our tiny house for a few more years with an extra child would be a struggle. A sad decision, but then we have a lot to be thankful for.

Thanks for the words of wisdom x

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