WWYD re taking DD out of nursery that I've paid for 4 weeks early?

[GuillotinedMaryLacey]

DD goes to daycare one day a week (grandmothers cover my other two working days). The last few months DD has started to really hate going to nursery and complains of a 'bad teacher'. We can't work out a reason why she's scared of this woman and the nursery staff haven't been aware of any issues but she's terrified for some reason.

I go on maternity leave in 3 weeks and have already handed in notice at the nursery - DD has four more Tuesdays there. WIBU to send her to my mother's on Tuesdays instead? My mother is fine with this btw but thinks that DD will think she can get out of anything she doesn't want to do.

From my pov, she's only 3 and is very upset about going to nursery and I hate to see her upset to this extent. Am I giving in to her? Should I make her go anyway? She also goes to a preschool three mornings a week and loves it.

I wouldn't make her go back if she really hates it to the point of being terrified.

That's what I think but I can see DH totting up the amount it's costing not to send her. But her little face is so anxious... :(

It's going to cost that amount whether you send her or not though.

You're either paying for her to be miserable and anxious, or you're paying for her to go to her grandmother's. I know what I would rather pay for!

Good point, thank you.

Every evening she asks where she's going in the morning and she burst into tears tonight when I said nursery. She's usually a happy little soul. That tells me all I need to know really. Just wanted to check I wasn't being really indulgent and pfb.

Ah poor mite, well at least you'll get a big smile this morning when she knows she doesn't have to go back :)

Sometimes it can be confusing with going to several places. I used to send my DS to nursery two mornings a week, my Mom and Dad had him the rest of the time. It was mainly to give them a rest and get him to mix with other children as he is an only child. He always cried when he was left which was heartbreaking but they said he was ok after I'd gone - the usual story.

When he was three we got the government funded childcare so I arranged for him to go to preschool for three days and the nursery the other two. This seem to mix him up completely and I had to come home from work one day as my parents couldn't stop him from sobbing. They suggested finishing the nursery and going to the preschool five mornings a week.

After that he was absolutely fine. We lost our nursery deposit but his happiness was the main thing. I think it was the continuity he liked and also the day seemed more structured. He had an older teacher which he seemed to like and the atmosphere there was less chaotic than the nursery which seemed to have children shouting all the time.

It was the best thing we did. Even now (he is 15) he says he hated the nursery and used to watch the clock go round to 1pm when he knew his nan was coming to fetch him

If it helps my Ds1 now 14 went to a nursery a couple of times a week. When he began pre school he began to do the same thing that you describe. I felt nursery was stricter and more regimented - it had to be -and he loved the new freedom of choosing what he wanted to do at pre school. I also removed him from nursery at that point, and wnet to 5 days at preschool.
There is no point/reason her being upset at 3 I also have a 3 year old and it would break my heart to leave him distressed.

You will look back when she is 14 and say why did I bother!!!! Honestly you are doing the right thing being with her nana.