Invite Dilemma

[cottonbutt]

DS2 (age 8) has been invited in a playdate with a classmate (B). B's Mum asked me in the playground and I accepted, thinking great, DS2 will love this, as it would be a change from the after school childcare arrangement. When I told DS2 of the invite he was emphatic that he did not want to go as he did not like B. (B seems to be having a pretty boisterous phase at the moment which is what is why DS2 does not want to go). They have never been particularly close, but the family seem lovely from what I know of them (playground chat) and I thought it would be nice to encourage this friendship. However, I feel that I should respect DS2s decision not to go.

So, how can I let decline this invite by causing the least offence? Shall I take the frank and honest approach by saying that DS2 does not want to play with the child at this time and that I hope they will be able to arrange something in the future, or should I play down the reasons to spare the feelings of B and his Mum? Advice welcome.

[Deaddei]

Yes I would be totally honest.
Not fair to send ds if he doesn't want to go.
I am sure the other mum will understand.

[cottonbutt]

Thanks Deaddei, I guess I would appreciate honesty rather than excuses if it were the other way round

[SarkyLady]

Ask your Ds what he would prefer you to do. He mat not be happy for you to tell them that he doesn't like this boy. IMO he is old enough to help you decide which is the best option. And then he can't blame you after the fact :)

[cottonbutt]

Thank you SarkyLady, I did speak to B's Mum and explained that Ds2 did not want to go, she did push for more detail, understandably, but seemed appreciative that I was honest so this was the best outcome all round I feel.

THis is a small dilemma in the whole scheme of things, but great advice given, received and acted on - thanks mumsnet :-)