Family tension

[Beavermum]

My DS is 6 and an only. My Sis has 2 DS 9 and 11. When DS was young we had to stop DS going there without me or DH because Dns were v rough and had hurt him (badly) a couple of times. DS stays with other friends and family happily and he enjoys his cousins company when they are here or we have family events.

Last night DS said goodnight to DH and DH said bet your looking forward to next weekend when he is meant to be staying with DS whilst we go to do 200 miles away. DS burst into tears and said he didn't want to go because cousins hurt him and nobody believes him. It was late and he was v v upset so we just said ok you don't have to go.

This moring we asked him what happened and he said the boys take his fave (bedtime) toy and hide it and hit in the stomach when they all had a pillow fight. Apparently he told my sis and she said you just need to sort it out between you. It sounded more like boys rough housing and they do a lot also their dad encourages them to be "tough" (he is a bit of a t**ser). DH said don't worry about it we'll give bedtime toy to sis and she can make sure its ok. DS start sobbing saying won't go we asked if ok to go to GP or my brother and family kids of similar age who he knows less well because live further away - he said yes.

So he is definitely not going but will have to tell sis and don't knwo what to say any advice how I frame that?

[cjel]

Well done you for listening to DS. Not sure what you can say to sis, perhaps try he would prefer to go to ..... and then if she asks say that her ds are a bit rough for him and he feels uncomfortable? not sure really gut feeling is the boys should be aware that you have heard things about them but it is really hard to know if your ds is building too much into things or if they really are nasty to him, either way he should not be made to go to them if he feels that strongly. hope he is ok.xxxxxx