Quick background, i met a friend, lets call her sally for this thread, at under 1s when our dds were babies in 2007. Me, her and another friend (who i went to school with) became good friends and started meeting every week at various places.
Sally got married in 2008 and i made her wedding cake. I had my ds in Jan 09 and Sally had her dd in March 09.
Things started to become unsettled when we were pregnant because Sally became abit besotted by me (that is the only word that can descibe it) meaning she started copying me and buying the same things as me etc. I thought it was a bit weird but egnored it.
At the same time, Sally became distant with our other friend. The reason is still unknown. Our other friend had a dd in March 2010.
Then last year Sally started lying to us about things and became unreliable. She would say she would meet at the paddling pool for instance then wouldn't show, or would text at the last minute to cancel.
She became unbearable, lying over everything, not making any sense. She became so distant to our friend, i think she saw her about 3 times after our friend had her 2nd dd.
The last straw was when she didn't turn up to my wedding in December. We hadn't fallen out and she said she was coming. She sent me a message at 11.30pm on the wedding night to say sorry she couldn't make it - she was snowed in. It was nonsense.
I was very hurt by this and decided to end our friendship. I didn't want to speak to her because i was hurt so i wrote her a letter explaining why.
About a month later, she tried to contact me (on my ds's birthday) to say happy birthday to ds and that she was sorry. I egnored this.
Then another month later in February, she contacted me again to say sorry. This time i responded and said i wanted the real reason why she didn't come to my wedding. She told me the real reason was she got the day wrong. She said she thought it was a Saturday wedding and when she realised it was a Friday wedding she felt really stupid (she is quite ditsy) and made up the excuse she was snowed in. She asked if we could meet up but i still felt annoyed with her so declined.
Then a few weeks later i had found out she had stood up a friend and hadn't returned something borrowed from another friend and i snapped. I sent her a really shitty message (very mature i know) which expressed my anger at her. She replied with lots of f offs etc and that was that.
Then yesterday i ran into her mum whilst she was walking her dogs. Her mum was so nice to me and just said Sally had a bad year last year and had taken too much on etc.
Now i feel confused. Part of me thinks purhaps i was so wrapped up in thinking Sally was being a bad friend last year by the way she was with people when actually, if she was having a hard time, i should have been there for her as a friend and seen something was wrong.
I don't know whether to get forget it or to appologise to her for the horrible message or what?
I need a nutrual voice on this.