How can we persuade FIL to leave hospital for care home?

[pumpkinaobscura]

He went into hospital in about November after feeling very ill. many tests were done and nothing found. Within a day of him going in it also became apparent that he was suddenly very confused. After months of being in hospital whilst not physically ill, he has a diagnosis of Vascular Dementia. MIL who is separated from him has worked hard to find a nice care home for him A few days ago staff from the home went to fetch him. he refused to go. Yesterday they tried again. He went had a tour round then said he needed to be taken back to hospital as he'd booked a lunch. They took him back so he's still there.MIL is worn out from the stress of this plus trying to liaise with social services, find out his financial situation, sort out his house and bills etc. We are giving what help we can but live some distance away.
It's difficult as FIL whilst having confusion over some things like sense of time etc. is also quite lucid in some ways and rightly doesn't want control taken from him.
Would be grateful for any advice from anyone who understands about this situation.

Is there no way that he could remain at home with support. Has he been awarded a social worker? Has he been assessed under the mental capacity act?

If he has not been properly assessed then the manager or nurse in charge should have come out to do an assessment, it does sound as though they have handled it wrong. There are charities such as the Alzheimers society than can give good advice and support. Whilst it is very difficult it may need him to return home and things not go well before he agrees to go into a care home.

Our helpline is available on 0845 300 0336 from 8.30am to 6.30pm Monday to Friday.

You might also consider looking at 'Talking Point' our forum forum.alzheimers.org.uk

Hope this helps

Thanks for the above advice.He has been assigned a social worker and assessments done. Before the diagnosis the social workers said it was fine for him to go home. I don't know if they still think this. I personally don't think it would be safe for him to do this.
I just find it a bit odd that he can stay in hospital indefinitely as if it's his home.

Because of his diagnosis he is not considered to be'bed blocker'. He has a condition which warrants care. They will still be working behind the scenes to find a solution. Unless he has been proven to lack capacity then the social worker has to try to accomodate his wishes. The only advice i would give is that things can change, sometimes quickly, so your family should try not to worry about what may happen. For him it should be about him enjoying what he can and minimising risk, but without removing independance completely, with no one should want to, or have the right to do.

Thanks birdsgotta, that's helpful info.