Alternatives to dinner? Advice needed about reciprocating invitation

[ginghamgiraffe]

I need to reciprocate some overdue invitations.

Since moving into a new area, we've attended a few "proper grown up" dinner parties.
You know the kind of thing, six couples, canapes before hand all beautifully presented at these friends' houses. Three couples in particular are a fair bit older than us - they have children at secondary school, we have a preschooler.

This makes it awkward to have them round with others as more of our friends are in the same boat as us rather than with older kids iykwim.

Added to which we're a bit more rough-round-the-edges - no dining room but also not much room in the house generally.
I'm not trying to compete but feel so rude not inviting them back.
Should really have had a barbecue on a weekend in the summer but it just didn't happen.
Any advice on how we can invite them back in a more casual fashion?

I think you should just invite them over for a casual meal your style. We tend to do more formal sit down dinners at our house, but generally our friends have a much more relaxed sit anywhere, plates on your lap type of meals. I'm just happy to be invited and don't feel the least bit offended that our meals are more formal than theirs. Also, sometimes I go with kids, sometimes without, and vice versa and no one seems to mind as long as they have an idea of how many are coming in advance.

just cheese and wine evening?

cocktails and canapes?

curry night...make a hot one, and a mild one...chutneys, naan bread, popadoms etc...

im always happy to be invited anywhere where food is served!!!

Well, you could do something themed round a night happening soon, what about Bon fire night? Is there a good display near you? You could invite them to join you and have food before/after (maybe starters and mains before, pudding after the display?) - lots of 'hearty' food and everyone will expect it to be more low key.

I was going to suggest wine tasting as well. Perhaps you could combine it with cheese tasting - there are so many great new cheeses now - and/or chocolate tasting (go to the Hotel Chocolat website for inspiration). Then all you need to provide is a few nibbles, perhaps some tapas or something, and everyone will feel like they have had a good meal.

PS I had NO IDEA there was an etiquette section in MN. Am going to think of some etiquette questions now.

thanks for these
Bumping

Cheese and wine - you can make it fancy but it doesn;t need to cost much - we have gone down that route as the little 8 people gatherings ballooned into 18 people gatherings and it was costing us £300 to do the evenings.

just have them over and use your own style, no need to theme the evening up - have some drinks and something to eat, doesn't ahve to be all fancy

How about a halloween party before going out trick or treating? No sit down food necessary.

Wait until December and have mulled wine and mince pies one afternoon? Maybe some bread and cheese around but no sit-down food

Invite for drinks, circa 7.30-8. Just do nibbles, and maybe push the boat out for cocktails - if their kids are older, they may still remember the trials of entertaining non-busom buddies with a little one.

Pizzas and wine?

Make the pizza yourself, 3 or four different ones plus a big green salad and garlic bread.
Olives and spiced nuts to nibble beforehand.
Make a cake for dessert.

It's informal, but the food is still fab.

how about a weekend 'brunch'? less formal than dinner or even lunch, and easier to cater.

Etiquette topic??

Cheese and wain?

Is this hyacinthbouquet.net?

OP - don't feel like you have to stand on ceremony - personally I love the fondue party, you can hjave a real Abigail's Party theme going on.

You just missed the BBQ boat.

Can it wait until November 5th and have a firework party with jacket spuds, sausages, chilli etc?

Or a halloween party, you can do those halloween games (apple bobbing etc) for the kids with sparklers, and make mulled cider and serve something earming like chilli, or bangers and mash.

There are actually still people who serve canapes before dinner?

Why not just have them all round for a vat of home made curry/slow cooked lamb/chilli con carne and tacos (i.e. something easy and not fiddly). Never mind if their food was "smarter". Nobody cares (or if they do, they're not worth being friends with). In fact they may even prefer a more relaxed evening - maybe they're just waiting for someone to do it first!?

Casual suppers are the way forward IMO.

Agree re casual suppers.

I also know nobody who serves canapes. Thank god.

Oh, come on, in your heart of hearts, you know canapes rock.

Do tortilla chips and dips count as canapes