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previously violent exh / access

1 reply

bbmsts · 06/09/2010 21:31

I split up with my ex 2 years go after years of us all having to deal with his temper. It all came to a head after a particularly bad experience and I left with our three DCs then 4, 2 and 4 months.

I then did a very stupid thing and, having taken advice from various people (legal, HV, etc) I decided it would be OK to let him have access to the two oldest DCs in public places after he had therapy for his anger.

Thing is, I still don't trust him. I have seen this anger in him again recently and I don't know what I can do. He had a major outburst over the phone to me last week and a couple of months ago DCs decided not to go with him when he picked them up and I could see he wasn't happy. It's hard to explain, but he has a look when I know he is going to flip and go completely over the top and I saw it then without any doubt.

DC1 usually loves seeing him, they have a fantastic time together etc etc and I get no feeling whatsoever that he is in anyway violent towards them. DC2 however currently refuses to see him. DC3 still doesn't see him and I am dreading the day when that changes tbh.

There's no need to say I am an idiot, I know full well I have made some pretty serious errors. I just need to fix things.

OP posts:
zoelikesjam · 10/09/2010 00:24

you havent made any errors hun. Honestly, if this was to ever go through court, they will aplaud you for letting him see them. You have done the right thing by making it in a public place.
I wont go into details now as i am exhausted but if you need to talk about this i have unfortunatly had 'experiance' and still am now, pm me on here and i'll have a chat with you about all the in's and out's x

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