Please look at our wedding ceremony...

[ButterpieBride]

Does this sound good? We are doing the legal bit quietly a couple of days before, and we can't afford a celebrant, so we are kind of making it up as we go along...ceremony is in a theatre.

1pm onwards...guests arrive, bride and groom welcome everyone and there are nibbles out and music on. Bar is open and there is a table of glasses of fizzy wine or juice for people to get their first drink as they enter.

2.30pm- B+G disappear with their two DDs for a final cuddle/breastfeed/adjusting of outfits before ceremony

2.45pm- guests move into theatre audotorium

3pm CEREMONY BEGINS- music playing
Groom enters stage with his parents and sits down
Bride enters stage with her parents at each side and bridesmaids behind
Everyone sits down- B+G in middle, parents either side (next to their own offspring, alternating gender), bridesmaids spilt to either side. Baby bridemaid will hopefully be happy being held by an adult bridesmaid, and 3yo bridesmaid will hopefully sit relatively still.

B+G welcome guests and introduce ceremony (2 minutes)
PoB speech/reading for 5 minutes
PoG speech/reading for 5 minutes
Bridesmaids speech/reading for 5 minutes

Ceremony bit (it's a reading by all our parents basically, involving the parents asking the opposite child to marry their child, if that makes sense)5 minutes

B+G swap rings, with a short little speechy bit each- 2 minutes

DD1 (3.5yo) shouts "Mummy and Daddy are married!"

Big snog, clap, mums cry, etc.

Then we go out of the audotorium and the rest of the day begins.

Is that near enough to a traditional wedding to still be weddingy? I don't really know what goes on at normal weddings.

It doesn't sound like a conventional wedding, but it sounds very unique and special.
I'm sure it will be very relaxed, casual and personal. The type of wedding that people will remember, hopefully for all the right reasons!

It's interesting that you're going to greet your guests and offer them drinks etc before the ceremony. Of course the norm is to have people gathering in the ceremony venue, the day begins with the ceremony and the drinks and greetings come after.
There's no reason at all why you can't swap it all round, unless you'd like to make more of an impact with your entrance. (People seeing your dress/outfit for the first time etc.)
The other thing I might be concerned about is whether the small children involved would be more likely to be patient and quiet in a ceremony at the beginning of if they'll already be starting to get a little tired after being 'on duty' for 2 hours already.

I like the idea of your parents asking each of you to marry their own child. That's really original.

It's hard to write your own ceremony, isn't it. I wrote our wedding too, along with both our DC's naming ceremonies. It makes for a wonderfully personal and unique ceremony, but it can be hard to know where to start.

Have you considered adding any music at any point?

sounds lovely! it doesn't sound like a 'normal' wedding but that doesn't matter does it?

the only thing to think of is who's going to be the master of ceremonies, or similar? who will tell each person it's their bit? that's normally the role of the registrar or priest or wedding planner perhaps.

Two hours is quite a long time from kick-off to ceremony I think. Will there be children there?

I agree with ruddynorah that having an MC can be good thing, but it's not entirely necessary if you prefer not to.
You could use a family member or close friend who you feel is suitable for the role and has enough stage presence.
Alternatively, if you would like a professional, but not a priest or registrar, one other possibility would be hire a celebrant from the British Humanist Society. The society offers support and celebrants to people who want to hold non-religious ceremonies, weddings, funerals, namings etc.
We used celebrants from there for all three of our ceremonies and they gave it an extra professional/official feel, but still keeping it relaxed. The celebrant will also help you organise and write the ceremony itself. They can be a great help.
In our cases, the celebrant charged about 150 pounds to do each ceremony.
If you're interested, you can get more info from the BHS site: www.humanism.org.uk/about

I agree with TFM. 2 hours is a long time but the ceremony you've planned sounds fabulous. Enjoy your day!

oh yes 2 hours is rather too long for mingling. will there be food at some point? is this after the ceremony?

at a 'normal' wedding the guests would arrive, be seated. and within perhaps 15 mins the ceremony starts.

The mingling is due to the fact that after we had sent out the invites saying when it was starting, a couple of people said they could only get there for three, so we had to move the ceremony to fit them in. Sigh.

We're planning on having nibbles (crisps, nuts, sweets, biscuits) and drinks (including brews) before the ceremony, then the buffet afterwards.

Although our kids usually nap after lunch, so it might be a chance for them to nap (if we can calm them down enough) then they are fresh for the ceremony.

We did look at getting a humanist celebrant, but it would cost too much. We did consider appointing an MC, but we can't think of anybody that isn't too much "mine" or "his" yet has enough gravitas.

Music wise- music would be good, but not sure where it would go.

I wouldn't change too much for people who can't get there for the specified time.

I wouldn't expect the kids to nap on the day, they will sense that something is up and be a bit hyper maybe?

Have the parents practised their bits in front of you both? I can't help feeling the bit where they ask the SIL/DIL to marry their child might sound a bit

Sounds lovely. Only concern would be that 2 hours is a long time "mingling". And it's nice to make an entrance IYKWIM . And if you give people drinks before the ceremony they'll be popping out to the loo during it. Or get bladdered. This is usually the quiet ones who let their hair down for the special occasion.

I wouldn't move the ceremony for Johnny-come-latelies either but then I very stroppy stubborn.

I wouldn't normally, I was just so stunned when they rang and asked that I agreed. Then a different auntie asked the same thing.

Maybe you've made your decision and decide to stick with it, but I'm afraid I have to agree with everyone else.
It is your day and I assume that you have lots of guests coming. It seems rather unusual for one or two guests to ask you to rearrange your entire day around their inability to come at the allotted time.
In our case, some guests came to the ceremony and left immediately afterwards, while some couldn't make the ceremony and only came to the reception.
Are the people who asked you to change such important members of the party?
Or alternatively, would it be possible to put back the start time altogether?