I don't always Read The Full Thread. AMA (name change, obvs).

[Goonyoucanaskme]

Or feel free to discuss your own feelings around non-full-thread-reading.
If the OP seems to be in distress, I take care to read all of their posts before commenting in case there has been an alarming development of some kind, especially if serious illness or violence is possible.
Otherwise, I chip in with a thought or opinion as soon as I read something that resonates, and it seems to make some posters surprisingly cross.
For example. OP posts she is sitting in the middle of the road in the middle of the night refusing to go home because she's upset that her boyfriend left her outside the nightclub and thinks he should come and pick her up. And I say 'You can't do that OP, it's dangerous and not worth it to make a point.' And someone replies sarcastically, 'RTFT FFS - she got a taxi and was home ten minutes ago.' And I think, 'But my point was still valid, and was what I had to offer to the conversation.'
I think this is like normal conversation. People chip in with things as and when they feel the urge, without necessarily knowing the full story. Studying a thread carefully and avoiding repetition and deviation is something a bit different, and seems a lot to ask on a discussion forum.

TLDR

I’m with you, op. It’s really only the sensitive threads where people ought to read updates. Most threads descend into a general discussion anyway so the actual relation to the OP’s situation becomes secondary.

I rarely read long posts (yours is about my limit) so easily miss stuff. I do, however, read ALL the OP posts before I comment, and think this should be the law.

Do you mean all the posts on the thread, or all the OP's posts? Sometimes there are hundreds of posts before I start reading a thread, I'm not going to read all of them. ETA: SORRY SORRY I just misread and didn't see the 'OP' in your response.

Cancel the cheque

My question is, do you know that RTFT means ‘read the fucking thread’? 😂 or it does in my world… thought that was throughout the internet!

I never read a full thread either. OP’s posts though, yes.

Do you think that advice is unique though? I’d imagine OP had been told about 50 times to get out the road if she was already home by the time you’d added your contribution 😆

If I’d RTFT would I know where that ironing board went?

No, I thought it was 'full' thread, innocent soul that I am.

I do not think my advice was unique. Of course not. But when I join in a conversation about anything at all in real life, I am unlikely to make a unique point. I'm just joining in. Chatting. Passing the time of day.

That's a tricky one. The right answer might have been on the thread, but how would you know?

Perhaps try yoga or or buying a cockerpoo? Sorry if these suggestions have already been made - I haven't RTFT. Or the OP obvs.

I think someone recommended cancelling the cheque, so I'll use the money to buy a cockerpoo.

The thing is that, if you believe a thread is too long for you to read, whom do you expect to read your post - after you've deliberately decided to make a thread that you believe to be too long even longer?

Either somebody does read the full thread - in which case it won't be much fun for them at all reading virtually the exact same comment 100 times; OR they only skim the thread or just read the OP's posts, in which case they won't actually see yours anyway.

Ergo you're only wasting your time and adding nothing in posting something that is clearly quite obvious and not going to be unique, whether anybody reads it or not.

Moreover, I realise that it was very unusual circumstances, but I always think back to the thread where the OP was terminally ill, had visiting Anglesey on her list of final wishes, and was asking people for tips on the best places on the island where she should go.

Heartbreakingly, she died before she ever got the chance to go; as some other posters who knew her and her family well had to share with everybody else on the thread. Obviously, they were not the OP, so their posts wouldn't have shown if you clicked to just read the OP's posts. After all of the posters paying lovely tributes to her and saying how very sorry they were to hear the tragic news, it went on for ages and ages, with people 'telling' this poor deceased lady which attractions she absolutely must not miss visiting. Clearly it was absolutely not intentional on their part, but it really did turn an otherwise bittersweet thread very sour. It would certainly have upset any of OP's family members who read it.

I've just realised that I didn't ask a question - and this is an AMA... but is there any point if OP isn't likely to read it anyway?!

I read every post on the threads I start, and reply to many of them. I get annoyed when OP only posts once or twice and ignores the thoughtful advice given.

Terribly sad about the thread you describe.
I don't expect everyone to read my posts on other people's treads. I hope that a few people will, including the OP, but I accept that they may not. It is the nature of holding a conversation with multiple people on a huge site like Mumsnet. Its not a small intimate discussion group.

Do you see threads as being a conversation between you and the OP, or between you and the other contributors to the thread?

LTB.

He bought valentine's roses from the same florist he bought some for 5 years ago for his ex. That's a red flag right there.

And if that weren't bad enough he took you to a restaurant with green wallpaper after you made it quite clear green is your least favourite colour and you intended to wear a blue outfit.

There was also a recent very sad thread where the OP was posting about a change in her cat’s behaviour & then the cat died soon after.

MNHQ had to put an update in the thread title because idiots were still commenting on the OP’s first few posts.

I’m one of the people who gets cross about this. There are so many threads now totally dominated by non-readers who derail any possibility of the discussion serving the OP. It seems to me to be phenomenally arrogant to proceed as if your uninformed interjections require to be heard. And, yes, I think the same about real life conversation as well. Better to keep your mouth shut and be thought a fool than open it and remove all doubt.

If the same thoughtful advice is given 10 times should the OP respond every time?
What if it is given 30 times?
After how many times is it reasonable for the OP not to respond?

Should the OP respond when the advice is no longer applicable? Like in your sitting in the middle of the road example.

Nice if OP responds to some of the posts. Not all obviously especially if repetitive. But I am not going to read everyone's responses to someone else's long thread just in case someone has already made my suggestion. I throw in my twopence worth with the rest.

So your aim in posting is not to be helpful but to feel good about posting.

Annoying as fuck on here and social media.

OP: Does anyone have some old towels for my cat rescue sanctuary?
Poster 1: Do you rescue dogs too?
OP: No just cats.
Poster 1: I have towels, but only tea towels and I only give towels to dogs.
Poster 2: Yes I would like some towels please. Can you deliver?
OP: No, I want towels for the rescue cats. I'm not giving towels away.
Poster 3: Do you still have the towels? What colour/size? Where are you?
Poster 4: Oh brilliant, I have been looking to adopt an owl. Have PM'd you.