Page 8 | £150k salary aged 35 AMA

JacknDiane · 30/10/2025 08:41

Well you've worked hard and put the hours in, so well done @RaeS345

DeftWasp · 30/10/2025 08:48

RaeS345 · 29/10/2025 23:19

Thank you very much. It’s really kind of you to say that.

if we were mortgage free, I think both of us would love to consider something else that is not corporate. I do a creative writing class so would love to write something. My husband has a dream of setting up a coffee shop as a cooperative for people with special needs with a personal focus on Down syndrome which is close to his heart. So he would work with local charities to seek out part time coffee shop staff but allowing for a business model that means they would also co-own the business. This is a long way off though as we would need some funds to set this up.

I am really aware that jobs change and companies restructure though, so I don’t want to assume we will be earning these salaries forever and life hiccups along the way might mean we feel we need to continue down a corporate route for stability

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I would advocate not making that a "really long way off" - make it sooner rather than later, I have never earned at your level, but by being a bit canny with buying and selling (and doing up property) I got rid of mortgage debt at 40, not by having a palace, but a nice, sturdy house in a nice location.

This means I can indulge passions, work less, experience more. I visit a lot of people in my work as an electrician and sadly encounter quite a few who have scaled the corporate / career ladder, earned very well, purchased bug homes that have finally been paid off age 65 and that great pension is ready to go - but alas health issues mean they can't enjoy it.

Better to have less and enjoy more whilst relative youth is on your side!

Original poster

RaeS345 · 30/10/2025 08:57

Nic718 · 30/10/2025 07:27

They wouldn’t lose 1.5k per month cash. Thats the whole point. They are essentially throwing away £10,000’s of free money every year they have nursery age children.

I suspect because they say they don’t have friends earning similar amounts that nobody has ever explained it to them. It is literally the first thing that pretty much everyone on that sort of salary does when they have nursery age children. Failing to do so leaves them working at effective 100% marginal tax rates, possibly more.

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Thanks so much for the advice and for taking the time to spell it out. Promise we’re not dim and have spoken to financial advisors about this, as our DD has been in nursery for the past 3 years so we discussed whether we should put into our pensions in order to bring our salaries below 100k when she first started.

in the UK if any one of you in the household brings in over 100k you don’t get the hours, so not only would both of us have to over pay into our pension to get us both to 99k or less but due to my husband’s bonus (he is 119k salary but gets a bonus on top of that each year which works out at about 15 - 20k after tax) he would have to be putting in substantially more to account for the bonus too.

I will triple check back with our advisor, but when we did the sums on both of us doing this (me at 150k no bonus, him at 119k not including a bonus) it didn’t make sense for the monthly take home. But you have made me wonder so I will definitely check thank you as I don’t want us to be doing anything that makes no sense given we have a further 3 years ahead of us.

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OrangeBlossomsinthesun · 30/10/2025 08:58

RaeS345 · 29/10/2025 22:30

No we don’t in honesty though this is the first year we are debt free. So this is the first year we are no longer paying off credit cards, overdrafts and student loans. It has taken us a long time to clear debts, as we paid for our wedding and house deposit with no family help (both parents don’t have a lot of money).

Household income is very high, £280k total household income between myself and my husband. Outgoings monthly split:

mortgage - £2,400
2 kids in nursery - £2230
bills - £860
savings - £4000
“fun money” per person - £550 each
joint account for kids / food / petrol / days out / weekends - £1100
car finance - £260

It has taken a while to pay off overdrafts, credit cards and our student loans

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This is just fucking ridiculous. You can save 4000 a month and spend 550 EACH on "fun" money and you don´t feel well off? Give over!

OrangeBlossomsinthesun · 30/10/2025 08:59

I don´t even EARN 4000 a month for fucks sake. And yes I have a mortgage and 2 kids.

Original poster

RaeS345 · 30/10/2025 09:01

Fayaway · 30/10/2025 01:32

Oh yes I get that but I meant a smaller place or rent?

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You’ve answered it for me, we would have a smaller place or we would have to rent 🤣🙈

we did live in London all through our 20s - loved it! Just would never have been able to buy a family home

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Original poster

RaeS345 · 30/10/2025 09:03

DressOrSkirt · 30/10/2025 02:01

Most people don't have family help for weddings/house deposits, and most people don't go into debt for them.

Did you have a particularly fancy wedding, and do you try to "keep up with the Jones'" more generally?

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Anecdotally in our friendship group this isn’t the case, and lots of our friends got married with help from parents and definitely had deposits either through help from mum and dad or sadly through the loss of a grandparent. Not a flashy wedding really no £23k all in, but it took us years to save 23k!

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Original poster

RaeS345 · 30/10/2025 09:05

BitterTits · 30/10/2025 01:36

You've mentioned a long commute and living in the north, but you're on the train by 7:30am, which sounds pretty ordinary. What are your working and commuting hours on a typical day?

North might be misleading not to be too outing, think north of Birmingham. Usually in London for 9.30, first meetings are typically 10am. Last meeting typically 5pm. Sometimes have events which would be on an evening but rare, so usually home for 7 / 7.30pm

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Original poster

RaeS345 · 30/10/2025 09:12

24252627a · 30/10/2025 06:17

Does the £100,000 cliff edge piss you off?
On your £150,000 salary a lot of that £50k must be subject to a lot of tax?

The tax I pay amounts to to £53,893.43 a year. That includes income tax and NI.

It is a lot, but I think that’s the way the world has to be surely that the higher earners contribute more to the running of society. And as lots of comments have pointed out here if those in the private sector didn’t pay this much tax the public sector wouldn’t exist / have salaries, so when I think of my parents working in state education their whole lives and many of my friends in the NHS I can be comfortable seeing that is where this money is going

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DiscoBob · 30/10/2025 09:12

Are you a fan of the comedian Bill Hicks?

Nextweektoo · 30/10/2025 09:15

Do you save for your children?

Hominim · 30/10/2025 09:16

Just to say you sound lovely

Original poster

RaeS345 · 30/10/2025 09:18

Steyning · 30/10/2025 06:46

@RaeS345
OP I just want to talk to you about the couple of posters who have commented on you not doing a job that contributes to society. And you've commented about being aware of this yourself.
I'm 51 and have worked as a nurse since qualifying at 21.
I decided to go in to nursing because I wanted to do a job that helps people and contributes to society; this felt very important to me upon leaving university.
Fast forward 30 years and I struggle financially enormously. My pay is low beyond measure in comparison to my senior level of responsibility and accountability for people's lives. My salary was frozen by the government for over 10 years and in that time COL and inflation soared. Nursing salaries will never catch up or recover from the decade long pay freeze. Meaning that in real terms I earn less today after 30 years experience than I would be earning if I hadn't had my pay frozen for a decade. This in itself has eroded my self esteem terribly. I feel unvalued by government and by society. I feel a failure at how little I earn. I work incredibly hard non stop, I work long hours, I work through my lunch breaks and I finish work late because I deliver high standards of care and don't cut corners with patient's health management. I train young nurses up to high standards. And in return for this, I am struggling to pay my bills, my mortgage massive % increase 3 years ago has crucified me, I can't afford to pay for the house repairs needed, I'm driving a 15 year old car, I haven't been abroad for 16 years, we live in a tiny house only 85m2 total size which is minute, and worst of all I cannot save for my 2 DC who are now teenagers. I simply don't have any money left each month to save for them. We need what money we have to survive day to day. Not being able to save for my DC is a guilt I cannot make peace with. And this lifestyle is at a top senior nurse salary. This leaves me feeling like a bit of an idiot, to be frank. I feel like I'm a complete mug, and I feel like I'm having the piss taken out of me every time I receive my monthly pay. This in turn has eroded my sense of purpose. It has definitely eroded my sense of pride.
To add to this, I am burnt out at 51. Mentally, physically and emotionally. Nursing for as long as I have bleeds you dry in the end on all 3 levels. I have nothing left to give of myself outside of work. This has impacted on my mental health.
To make matters worse, I cancelled paying in to my NHS pension whilst my pay was frozen for 10 years because I had young children and all the expenses that adds so I couldn't afford the pension payments, and since then the COL crisis has meant I still can't afford to pay in to it because of increase in mortgage and utilities and food. So I'm facing a state pension only after a life of service, which terrifies me.
So what I'm saying is, good for you. Enjoy your marketing job and your salary. I'm here to tell you that you a life of public service holds nothing more than struggling financially and feeling undervalued and exhausted. Any good I contribute to society through my job is at the expense of my own wellbeing, I can tell you that for sure.
If I had my time again, I'd leave Uni and walk straight in to the corporate world, earn a high salary, take pride in paying my high taxes knowing that would be my contribution to society, enjoy my lifestyle, and I'd focus on being a good, helpful and kind person. These things would make me a far happier person than I am today.
You've made the right career choice. By far.

Thank you so much for taking the time to read this. I’m so sad that that’s the way the government and the chronic underfunding of the NHS has made you feel. I am anti Tory so apologies in advance if you vote conservative (I’m guessing from your post that you don’t though) but I see this in every corner of my life that our public services have been stripped bare for years and now everything is creaking on its knees. That someone who is serving the country and saving lives in the way you do is made to feel this undervalued is a terrible reflection of our society. I hope that your teenagers have seen how hard you have worked and are proud of you. I would be proud if you were my mum. There are soo many parents out there who are loaded / high earners, but terrible terrible parents. The fact you have written what you have shows you are a brilliant mum x

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Original poster

RaeS345 · 30/10/2025 09:20

silverbirchjuniper · 30/10/2025 07:09

Hey OP. Forgive me if this has been asked (and answered!) already, but I’m really curious what area of media you work in? My DH works on the advertising side for a media owner (corporate, big global name) - he has about a decade’s more experience… and doesn’t earn as much! The crappy economy is hitting hard, and marketing budgets are usually the first to be cut - and there seem to be a lot of people out of work at the moment, particularly for senior level jobs.

My background spans both publishing and TV so I’m pretty sure you can’t be in either of those sectors as the money isn’t great 😂

do you work for somewhere like google or Spotify?

Similar to Spotify

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DeftWasp · 30/10/2025 09:23

RaeS345 · 30/10/2025 09:18

Thank you so much for taking the time to read this. I’m so sad that that’s the way the government and the chronic underfunding of the NHS has made you feel. I am anti Tory so apologies in advance if you vote conservative (I’m guessing from your post that you don’t though) but I see this in every corner of my life that our public services have been stripped bare for years and now everything is creaking on its knees. That someone who is serving the country and saving lives in the way you do is made to feel this undervalued is a terrible reflection of our society. I hope that your teenagers have seen how hard you have worked and are proud of you. I would be proud if you were my mum. There are soo many parents out there who are loaded / high earners, but terrible terrible parents. The fact you have written what you have shows you are a brilliant mum x

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What underfunding of the NHS?, I contract to the NHS, it's massively over funded and chronically badly run, that's a difficult thing to fix unfortunately - but money has never been an issue.

Original poster

RaeS345 · 30/10/2025 09:24

QuirkyHorse · 30/10/2025 06:41

You say you live up North.
If I got the 7:15 train from Manchester, I would get in at 9:30 ish.
Do you work full time for that salary, or are you part time?
Or is your North further South (controversial North/South divide cut off 😆)

I am surprised you can turn off and not think about work at the salary you are on.
At half that salary and working in the defence industry (engineer), I was expected to be available at any time of the day or night. Don't get me wrong, I was paid if I got called out of hours (it was a salaried position) but the expectation was that I would answer the phone and go on site if necessary.

Full time and don’t live as far north as Manchester.

most meetings start at 10am, so some days I am in for 9 some days in for 9.30. If my boss rang me at night (say post 9pm) I genuinely would think someone in our team had passed away. It is the type of modern company that really does respect that if people are working hard and doing their jobs, they deserve to have their evenings and weekends. Same with annual leave, we would never contact a colleague when they were on holiday.

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Notmyreality · 30/10/2025 09:25

Mrswhiskers87 · 30/10/2025 06:29

How is it feel to be such a bore?

Try again using grammar.

Goldfsh · 30/10/2025 09:30

Jeez that season ticket is so expensive. Do you think that if we had cheaper train fares (like much of Europe) it would improve social mobility? I've been thinking about getting a job with some days in London, until I realised that the cheapest day fare was 160 return, so I'd have to earn about 60k just to break even and work for free!!!

Original poster

RaeS345 · 30/10/2025 09:33

MyballsareSandy2015 · 30/10/2025 08:31

I’m surprised you’re on a 7.30am train if you’re up north.

i leave home 7.30ish, get into the office just before 9 and I’m in a London suburb with a great train service.

What time do you get to the office and what time do you leave?

if I am on the 7.27 I am in London in under 2 hours. Office right next to the station, so a 5-10 min walk. In the office before 10am.

if I am on the earlier 6.55am, I am sat at my desk before 9.15.

I do pay a huge train fare though at £1200 a month

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MidnightPatrol · 30/10/2025 09:34

RaeS345 · 30/10/2025 09:33

if I am on the 7.27 I am in London in under 2 hours. Office right next to the station, so a 5-10 min walk. In the office before 10am.

if I am on the earlier 6.55am, I am sat at my desk before 9.15.

I do pay a huge train fare though at £1200 a month

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I’d find this commute incredibly hard with two nursery age children, 3/4 days a week (!).

Original poster

RaeS345 · 30/10/2025 09:35

Almost2026 · 30/10/2025 07:14

Are you Netflix?

I would earn A LOT more there, Netflix salaries are ridiculous. To even get an interview is a challenge!

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MrsZiggywinkle · 30/10/2025 09:52

BigOldBlobsy · 29/10/2025 22:46

I wonder how OP will take this comment.
I’m a similar background, public sector, as are all my family. Quite underpaid for the level of stress and risk we hold in our roles. It can feel maddening to see these huge paying roles and realise that life really isn’t fair or equitable! Not to undermine your work OP. You seem as if you’ve worked your way up and done long hours, now reaping the reward.
it’s just madness that the people caring for the most vulnerable aren’t valued as highly! This is just my take on the posters question

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Why do public sector employees always question this? This assumption that private sector salaries are huge and everyone enjoys long lunches and a champagne lifestyle.

It’s basic supply and demand theory. It’s like asking why the CEO of a huge company earns millions while his support staff earn £30k to £40k.

There is a limited pot of money for public sector workers and that will vary depending on which party is in power what they deem to be important. Generally, public sector jobs are relatively secure with decent pensions, sickness and holiday benefits. On the other hand, private sector salaries CAN be better (not always) but benefits are often worse and if you’re not performing the company will ensure you are on your way out while simultaneously talking about an improvement plan.

This isn’t new. T’was ever thus.

IDontHateRainbows · 30/10/2025 09:58

I'm in a public sector job and it's actually quite well paid compared to the market. My role can be done in either private or public sector, and I'm probably about 10% ahead of comparable private sector roles currently being advertised. Public sector roles are job evaluated and the salaries negotiated with unions so there is more fairness, private sector especially in the current market where there is a shortage of jobs can 'pay to the market' which currently means salaries are going backwards.

Plus the pension is better of course.

MrsZiggywinkle · 30/10/2025 10:09

IDontHateRainbows · 30/10/2025 09:58

I'm in a public sector job and it's actually quite well paid compared to the market. My role can be done in either private or public sector, and I'm probably about 10% ahead of comparable private sector roles currently being advertised. Public sector roles are job evaluated and the salaries negotiated with unions so there is more fairness, private sector especially in the current market where there is a shortage of jobs can 'pay to the market' which currently means salaries are going backwards.

Plus the pension is better of course.

Huge swathes of private sector employees won’t even get an annual cost of living increase. I know quite a few people who haven’t had a rise in YEARS.

There’s a thread on here about a qualified solicitor with experience going through five rounds of interviews to be offered the job with a salary of £27.5k. Just to add, it’s not a trainee or entry level role.

Perimenoanti · 30/10/2025 10:20

RaeS345 · 29/10/2025 22:58

I think because I read a lot about “high earners” on here and often cannot relate to their expenditure at all. So I wondered if there were other “high earners” like me who don’t have a very flashy life, and haven’t come from money. I think 10 years ago if someone had asked me “what do you have to do to earn £150k a year” I’d have said “work in finance on Canary Wharf and be a man!” So I was hoping me earning this at my age as a woman who started out on 20k would show that it isn’t impossible as I would have been made to believe

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I am like that. I earn £100k plus equity, which grows at $1.5k a month on average. You really couldn't tell by looking at me or by my day to day lifestyle. I come from nothing and am still bewildered at the life I am living. I mostly put my money into pension and max out my ISA. My only asset is that I live in a 2bed in SE London in a nice area all by myself.

A give away might be that I don't worry about occasional spending. If my washing machine breaks or I no longer like it so what. I will just buy a new one. I don't mind paying for the more expensive flight if it means I don't have to go all the way to Heathrow. Things like that.

But I do like a good bargain and am quite savvy. I don't care about brands. The best thing to happen would be to find a cheaper version of a very good body cream, for example. I do like my money's worth for things that don't affect my home, time etc. Things that don't need to last.

The money gives me comfort about my future, although that is not guaranteed.