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AMA

Refusing a council house offer

228 replies

Crystal1970 · 27/08/2025 01:26

Hi, I have been in temporary housing for 4 years now during that time I was allowed to bid on 4 bed houses and advised when asked I wasn’t allowed to bid on 3 bed ones, the council have now visited and said we have found a suitable property for you it is a 3 bed house 🤔 one bedroom being a box room, I have 3 sons who are not small kids now I don’t mind 2 sharing a room but someone i know has said all you will get in the box room is a single bed . Now can I refuse this as jot being suitable I think it was under section 8 so if I refused they wouldn’t help me anymore.

OP posts:
Dunnocantthinkofone · 28/08/2025 11:02

SociableAtWork · 28/08/2025 10:48

Her DSons are ADULTS - 19, 21 and 23!!!

Surely they should be in their own places anyway?!?

Which came to light around 10 pages after I posted that so I’ve no idea why you are quoting me 🙄

Amonthinthecountry · 28/08/2025 11:52

Tryingmybest100 · 28/08/2025 09:53

I work in Housing. You need to visit the property and see what you think before jumping to 'can I refuse it?' You also need to speak to your homeless case officer and run through the scenerios of what would happen if you were to refuse this offer.

Each council has their own allocations policy (I suggest you look up the one you come under) but ours has recently changed significantly and its likely yours may have done too which is why you were previously only able to bid for 4 beds and now you are advised you can live in a 3 bed.

Where I am a 3 bed (2 doubles & 1 box) is adequete for a family of 4 with 3 boys. They would be expected to share. It makes no difference about your eldest needing a desk etc as his choice of employment doesnt trump the allocations policy. If you were to refuse this offer you would not only be taken off the re-housing list but would also be given a few days to vacate your temporary accommodation as I assume this was gained through the council (regardless of who pays for it). You will then be completely on your own in terms of housing and would be expected to source your own and move into it within a week. But your council may be different so you need to check.

You need to think very carefully on what you want here as I would assume that a secure roof over your and your children's head is more important than waiting for a 4 bed property you will probably never be allocated.

Please talk to your case officer before you make any decisions whatsoever.

Really good advice

OnlyFoolsnMothers · 28/08/2025 12:05

Grown adult men- sorry why can’t they move out- club together and rent?

Brunettesmorefun · 28/08/2025 15:52

Crystal1970 · 28/08/2025 01:40

I was always happy to move areas but we was not allowed

Who told you that you were not allowed to move? This story does not add up at all. You are a family of adults and I don’t believe the council have a duty to house you all.

Crystal1970 · 29/08/2025 03:16

IMustDoMoreExercise · 28/08/2025 10:21

But if you work for the public sector, then you are not really paying tax as the money you earn is from tax paid by the private sector. You are just getting income from taxes paid by the private sector and then paying some of it back to the government. That is all.

Oh believe me o pay tax it’s about 500 a month maybe more

OP posts:
Crystal1970 · 29/08/2025 03:22

Yes my eldest works but minimum wage no youngsters these days can just easily move out and rent/buy it is so hard even a 1 bed flat around here is at least £800 up a month , and yes I am genuine my whole point on this is why not let me bid on a 3 bed and only allowed to bid on 4 beds , and it was the council that said I wasn’t allowed to bid on 3 beds

OP posts:
Crystal1970 · 29/08/2025 03:25

whatasillygoose · 28/08/2025 07:12

Yes this. As adults they would not be expected to share bedrooms which is why the OP was assessed as needing a 4 bed house.

I do think @Crystal1970it’s worth exploring why you were told that if it’s not the case and that there could have been more suitable 3 bed properties over the years that you could have bid on. If it’s a council error then maybe there’d be more flexibility about waiting for another offer or changing what you’re allowed to bid on.

When I asked this yesterday she just said because you’ve been on the waiting list for 4 yrs and they need to get us homed

OP posts:
Doyouthinktheyknow · 29/08/2025 03:29

We have a 3 bed house with a box room. DS1 who is now 23 is living in it and has done for more than 15 years!

It's fine, he's got a bed and a tall slim chest of drawers and a slimline desk.

I had to share growing up so we never considered that the room was too small and it was all we could afford at the time.

Crucible · 29/08/2025 06:52

At those ages you've usually aged out of the legal duty to house you. At least that would be right in my borough. I think you need to stop fixating on the previous issue of 4 or 3 bed bidding. Its irrelevant now because your oldest is 23 for God's sake. Take the house, you should jumping at this chance.

Digdongdoo · 29/08/2025 07:03

Crystal1970 · 29/08/2025 03:25

When I asked this yesterday she just said because you’ve been on the waiting list for 4 yrs and they need to get us homed

Well there you go then.
With how hesitant you are, I'm assuming your temporary housing is a 4 bed?
Boys share bedrooms, someone can sleep in living/dining room, save for an office pod. There's lots of workarounds. Or you can club together for a private 4 bed?

mrschocolatte · 29/08/2025 07:19

IMustDoMoreExercise · 28/08/2025 10:26

Why is it nonsense???

It is true.

It’s not true at all. People working in the public sector pay taxes. That’s all.

IThinkPink · 29/08/2025 07:24

bestcatlife · 27/08/2025 07:45

Why on earth would you refuse? You've been in temp for 4 years!

Which was clearly very comfortable….and spacious!

OlderGlaswegianLivingInDevon · 29/08/2025 07:26

Oh my goodness !take that 3 bed as fast as you can !
down here you would no longer be eligible for even a 3 bed as you do not have ' children ' ! they are now all adults !!! and as such the Council is not required to house them.
so snap it up !

anon2022anon · 29/08/2025 07:30

To be honest, if you can't afford to pay privately for a 4 bed house, then you either need to take the 3, or have a serious conversation with your ADULT children that if they want a house with room to work at home and separate bedrooms, then they are going to be responsible for a portion of the rent each. If they don't like it, then they can look at moving to a shared house, which will also cost them.

Seismicshift · 29/08/2025 07:39

OlderGlaswegianLivingInDevon · 29/08/2025 07:26

Oh my goodness !take that 3 bed as fast as you can !
down here you would no longer be eligible for even a 3 bed as you do not have ' children ' ! they are now all adults !!! and as such the Council is not required to house them.
so snap it up !

Same here, OP I'd be very hesitant in refusing what you're offered theses days, although my advice might have been different a few years ago.

Can you take the middle sized room and think about dividing the biggest room in two with a removable partition? Would that give a bigger space than the box?

Have you asked directly what would happen if you refused it?

AxolotlEars · 29/08/2025 07:41

I would take it. In this area 4 bedroom houses are nearly non existent. You wouldn't be offered a 3 bedroom house with adult children

Changingforthisone1 · 29/08/2025 07:46

Crystal1970 · 29/08/2025 03:22

Yes my eldest works but minimum wage no youngsters these days can just easily move out and rent/buy it is so hard even a 1 bed flat around here is at least £800 up a month , and yes I am genuine my whole point on this is why not let me bid on a 3 bed and only allowed to bid on 4 beds , and it was the council that said I wasn’t allowed to bid on 3 beds

Any reason the other 2 aren't working?

sesquipedalian · 29/08/2025 08:02

“My boys are to big for bunk beds now 19 21 And 23 ”

So they’re not exactly children, OP. I’d snap up what you’ve been offered - with three adult children, the only reason you’ve been offered this is because you’ve been on the list for four years - and if you don’t take it, some other family will, and you’ll be homeless.

Overthebow · 29/08/2025 08:07

Crystal1970 · 29/08/2025 03:25

When I asked this yesterday she just said because you’ve been on the waiting list for 4 yrs and they need to get us homed

That’s your answer then isn’t it. You’ve been waiting 4 years, they don’t think it’s likely you’ll get a 4 bed any time soon and need to get you out of temporary accommodation so 3 bed it is. Accept it or private rent.

Minnie798 · 29/08/2025 08:07

I'm not sure why you would refuse. Years ago, when you were told you had to bid on 4 bed houses - you had dependants. With adult sons of 23,21,19 you won't be classed as having dependants now.
Two can share the largest room, you can have the next size and the other son can have the 'box' room.

BilbaoBaggage · 29/08/2025 08:44

Crystal1970 · 28/08/2025 01:51

I am a tax payer I work nearly 55hrs a week sometimes more and My boys are to big for bunk beds now 19 21 And 23 😂 and medical reasons I need a bigger bed (and no not because I am overweight) otherwise I would go into the small room , my eldest like myself work from home that’s why I am a bit concerned about the size of the smaller bedroom as he needs a desk in there M the other 2 boys can share

Even 4 years ago one of the 'children' was not a child. And now, none of them are. All these adults seem to manage to work from home in this temporary accommodation that you appear to be reluctant to give up. They should be considered separately from you at this point, making you entitled to a single bed flat. Leave the three bed for someone in real need.

Or take it and be thankful that your local council is still willing to house you all together.

viques · 29/08/2025 08:55

In a few years time when the children have moved on the OP will be back moaning that she is being charged bedroom tax……. You really can’t help some people can you.

I read in some online rag about a woman complaining about the council not replacing a dated but adequate kitchen, it then transpired that she was planning on buying the property through right to buy as soon as she qualifies!

FatherFrosty · 29/08/2025 08:55

this is anecdotal and I don’t know if it’s common place everywhere or just what happened in this case.

I’ve known one family where the council split the adult siblings from the rest of the family to house them, and then absolve themselves of responsibility for the adult who was on an apprenticeship so couldn’t afford to rent a room privately and had to give up his apprenticeship.

jolies1 · 29/08/2025 08:58

whatasillygoose · 28/08/2025 07:34

Once again, this thread like many others is full of judgment, reactionary bullshit and fucking internet bullies who enjoy making other people feel shit and ‘less than’.
The attitudes here are cruel and dehumanising and I’m so sick of seeing it.

Some actual facts and reality if anyone is interested.

It’s ok that the OP’s young adult children still live at home. That’s normal development and especially now when housing is so expensive. Would you rather 3 young adults who are potentially on lower incomes whilst building their careers or even still studying all live independently and possibly having to claim your ‘hard earned taxpayers money’ to help them pay their extortionate rent?

Young adults should be leaving home when they are ready and they want to not being forced out and separated because someone else decides they shouldn’t still want to live with their parent and siblings.

Council/HA housing is not funded or subsidised by the council. Residents pay rent, council tax etc
The rent is affordable and not victim to the ridiculous situation in the housing market. This is a good thing and to be celebrated.

You don’t have to be on benefits to be eligible for an LA property and it should not be a requirement to get one. So don’t assume your ‘hard earned taxes’ are funding LA tenants. More bullshit.

i wish that every single person in the UK/World had access to a safe comfortable home at an affordable rate which didn’t plunge them into poverty. What a lovely ideal to hope for rather than mocking and attacking.

Temporary housing is not necessarily a hotel, it could be another house or shared property that is not designated as available for long term letting.

On the subject of hotels, don’t for a minute imagine the Radisson or even a Travelodge. The ones I’ve seen are horrible places I wouldn’t spend an hour in myself. Awful conditions, no access to proper cooking facilities, not even allowed a kettle in their room, a shared fridge for 15 people where your food is stolen. I have left these places and cried for the families living there.

By 23 (actually as soon as I finished uni) when I was working I was expected to make a contribution to household costs when living at parents house - even on minimum wage are we honestly saying a 23 year old shouldn’t contribute any of their wage? Many are living independently in flat shares etc, on minimum wage paying market rent and share of bills.

whatasillygoose · 29/08/2025 09:49

jolies1 · 29/08/2025 08:58

By 23 (actually as soon as I finished uni) when I was working I was expected to make a contribution to household costs when living at parents house - even on minimum wage are we honestly saying a 23 year old shouldn’t contribute any of their wage? Many are living independently in flat shares etc, on minimum wage paying market rent and share of bills.

Feel free to show me where I said adult children shouldn’t make a contribution.

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