I spent 4 weeks in a mother and baby unit AMA

[SquigglyOne]

Would love to raise awareness and support those facing admission xx

How are you now? What led to your stay in the MBU and what treatment did you have that helped?
Do you ever think that things could have been different, like if you’d had more support during your pregnancy/early motherhood?
If you have a partner, how did they cope when you went into the MBU?
thank you for sharing x

Are you a very young mother ? What is MBU?

MBU is mother and baby unit - a ward where mums with mental health difficulties can be admitted with their baby instead of being separated, and get specialist help

I am much much better now - thank you ☺️.

I have had anxiety since my mum passed away in 2011 and have been on and off antidepressants for years.

Shortly after the birth of my second I started to experience severe anxiety symptoms and insomnia. At my worst I had not slept for 72 hours and by that I do not mean getting the odd hour of sleep here and there I mean literally zero sleep 🙈. This unfortunately led to a suicide attempt.

My GP advised me to attend A&E and from there I was referred to the MBU.

Treatment on the ward included resuming my antidepressants (had already started this before being admitted) and a short course of zopiclone (sleeping tablets). The nursery nurses would also have baby for overnight care to help aid sleep.

No, I do not feel things could have been different. I am very lucky in that I have a supportive husband and family around me. I think for me
it was purely an inevitable biological issue which required treatment.

My husband appeared to cope very well. Again, his parents are extremely supportive and helped with school runs/care of my eldest son so he was able to continue to work as normal. I think he had the obvious struggles and was clearly very worried about me but he doesn’t like to admit it and make me feel bad.

I am 34 … so no 🙈🙈😂😂

@SquigglyOnethank you for sharing and I’m so pleased you are feeling better now.
my husband’s friend’s wife experienced something similar and I always felt guilty that we could/should have done more for her. She’s ok too now.

your experience sounds so scary, I absolutely understand how being too wired to sleep plus post partum would lead to such extreme feelings. I’m glad you got the help you needed. I think it’s more common that we realise but really hard to talk about x

Are you feeling better now? I work on an mbu and I admire our mums so much 🥰❤️

I’m so glad you are doing well now - it must have been scary initially I would imagine?

I was supposed to go into one when I had pre natal depression with DD3 but there were no spaces - Ex was told to take me home and stay with me and I had twice daily visits from the MH team - obviously he called me dramatic and went straight back to work!

So much better thank you.

The care I received was nothing short of phenomenal, they honestly saved my life.

Thank you for what you do - it takes a very special person to do your job 💕

I’m sorry to hear you have been poorly too and didn’t received the support you needed from your ex!! how are you feeling now? Did the care in the community help?

Yes it was very very scary initially. As soon as my husband left the first night I was wailing that I wanted to go home and regretting my decision. You soon settle in though and the care from the staff is amazing. I feel very lucky that there was a bed available when I needed it.

I’m really pleased for you that you had somewhere to go and be looked after properly and that your family were supportive throughout

That’s so awful seeing what happens when there isn’t enough space. I’m so sorry you didn’t have the support you needed although at keast a team came to visit you but it’s really not the same as 24/7 care

Wow. You were very, very lucky to get into one. Good on you for raising awareness of how it helped you, hopefully if more people become aware of them, more of them will exist to help people.

Thank you 💕

I was so lucky - I wasn’t aware at the time how few units there are in the country. I was also lucky that the ward was only an hour away from home, some mothers have to be hours away from home to receive help.

She’s 16 now and divorce improved my mental health immensely 😃

I struggled throughout the pregnancy but never got as low as I was at that point and felt better once she was born.

Im glad you got a bed and the help you needed - than you for sharing your experience I hope it helps others x

I'm glad you are doing better now, OP. Yay for the amazing staff at these places, we are so lucky to have them.

I too had dreadful post natal depression after my third baby and was very depressed and suicidal. The massive hormones crash and low ferritin levels affected my neurological involuntary movement disorder symptoms and exacerbated them - i think they are all linked as oestrogen affects dopamine receptors and production etc, so hence the symptoms worsening.

At my lowest point during another terrible and terrifying time after a concussion a decade ago, I didn't sleep for a similar time - around 72 hours and I got to the stage where nothing psychotropic helped. Hence, my desperate GP prescribed the off label antipsychotic that gave me the movement disorder 😪💔

Hugs to you. I really truly empathise and understand ❤️

You shouldn't promote these places. The one I visited was absolute Hell on Earth. I've never felt so dehumanized and my health got significantly worse. These staff members don't care about you, you're looked down upon and nothing but a number to them. The greatest mistake I have ever done in my life has been to seek so called help for post natal depression.

Thank you for this. I had severe postnatal depression and my psychiatrist wanted me to go to an MBU - but when I visited I could

Thank you for posting this. I also agree that they are life saving places but definitely not enough. I was admitted to one about 90 mins away from home with my youngest child 15 years ago when i had post natal psychosis. I was lucky to get a bed close ish to home, the next option was several hours away!
I honestly believe that if i hadnt been admitted at that point things could have escalated to a very serious incident either to myself or others. I probably didnt appreciate the help enough at the time, in retrospect and with a clearer mind I was very lucky.
Glad your doing well and starting this thread xx

It's an asylum for mothers with babies less than a year old and for some at the later stages of pregnancy.

The rooms are like prison cells, but with a crib. Some rooms have blood on the walls from suicide attempts and at night you are kept awake not only by all the babies, but women screaming and having psychotic attacks. You also have to be careful with your baby because there is a genuine risk on someone going into a psychosis and attacking you or your baby. The staff tries to pump everyone as full of medication as possible to keep everyone docile and low-risk. Otherwise they are seriously unhelpful, you're just another person in a loonie bin, with no human value.

Once you have spent time in an institution, you are limiting your changes in the future. It's official that you have lost your mental capacity. This will have an impact on a number of employment opportunities, not to mention the stigma from society is very real. What the staff is reluctant to tell you is that mbus are voluntary. Most conditions would be better with time as sleep depravation and hormone levels improve. You'll only have therapy sessions once a week or so in these places, otherwise you don't get any increased therapeutic level of help in these s*tholes.

On top of all that, the social services and the police will be informed. As soon as your mental capacity is questioned, you are officially a potential danger to your own child.

In addition, if you ever separate your partner, this will impact on your chances with custody.

@Lilyrosepetal I'm so sorry that was your experience, I genuinely hope your feeling better now. It sounds like a nightmarish and traumatic experience.
However, I suspect as with all mental health facilities there are some that are better than others, and while your experience is one reflection of terrible help, not all mbu's are like that.

This couldn’t be further from the truth based on my experience. Obviously I understand some wards must be better than others and I am sorry for your awful experience

Neither the police or social services were involved in my case