I’m an only child of 2 only children AMA

[MarioJumbo]

I’m an only child - as was the case with both parents

My son is an only child no problems with him growing up.

Are your parents still together and are you close?

My parents remained together but both have died now.

We were close in adulthood but Norton childhood as up until I was 22 my mum had a drink problem

Do you have any children? Would you have an only child?

What do you perceive to gave missed out on as an only child with parents who were only children?

No I don’t have children but yes I’d absolutely have an only child

My mother was an abusive alcoholic so what I missed out on was no one else who could see things from my point of view

In your opinion what do you see as the positives of being an only child? 💐

independence

self reliance

whey your last parent dies you can make all the decisions regarding dealing with their estate yourself

Do you feel you missed out? My DM waps an onl child and she felt this deeply
Problem was she romanticised siblings - she would have someone to share the burden of her elderly mother, she would have a ready made friend, she would never be lonely etc. I was the child born purely to be someone's sibling. I really never felt wanted and my sister and I never really got on until DM died. She treated DS like her sister. I only wanted one child as I just didn't feel the benefits outweighs the negatives.

Do you have friends you have been close with since childhood?

Don't you think the grass is always greener? I'm one of 4 and consciously chose to have an only.

Ans the flip side : many friends actively hate their siblings.

People always moan about their birth position etc in families but ultimately none of it really matters.

I did romanticize the idea of siblings as a child but not as an adult

as a child my mum was an abusive alcoholic - and used to call me spoilt. As an adult now I’m out of her clutches it’s much easier and I don’t necessarily want siblings now although I can acknowledge in good sibling circumstances it’s a blessing

No !! I hated my school !! So no close childhood friends !!

Interesting thread. Are you happy? Who do you spend time with at Christmas?

Do you have wider family that you see, such as children of cousins x generations removed or were your grandparents and great grandparents also from small families?

I’m the same OP. It’s a situation not many people seem to be in. No aunts/uncles/cousins or extended family. I have 1 child myself and my husband is also an only child!

Christmas’s are quiet!

I’m also one of four who chose to have an only. There wasn’t enough of anything to go round as we were growing up — money, food, space, attention etc.

Yes definitely as a child I thought the grass was greener

no

My grandparents and great grandparents were from large families but don’t see anyone no - we’ve all scattered - I’ve deliberately gone non contact with quite a few

Yes I’m happy - my partner is everything I could want

I spend time with him at Xmas

I have an only child. I am an only child. My dad is any only child. My mum has one sibling a decade younger than her (so she was an only child for most of her childhood) who she is estranged from in adulthood.

I wanted to have two children but fertility had other ideas. My childhood was good in many ways but sometimes lonely. And when my mum got breast cancer when I was in my early 20s it felt like an awful lot to bear in my own. Which is why I would ideally have liked two children.

We facilitate a lot more play dates and activities for my child that I had so she spends a lot less time alone than I ever did.

Me too! DH only too. DGma only and DGpa had a sister but she had no kids.

I hate it. Had more than one!

I would have thought your life experiences, especially in childhood, are far more impacted by being the child of an alcoholic than being an only child, though that can’t have helped.