Just diagnosed with ADHD and Autism

[CrystalMud]

Diagnosed with 'AuDHD' at 38 - AMA!

Better awareness, thank fuck.

Oh, and the impact of Covid.

There is no help for ASD. The diagnostic services just diagnose and discharge. If your DD needs help for difficulties associated with ASD then she can be helped regardless of diagnosis. Don't allow people to fob you off with saying that she needs to be diagnosed first.

In my experience getting a diagnosis of autism doesn’t mean you will get any help or support unfortunately. There is no post-diagnostic support for children (or adults) in my area. I’ve been told to contact charities for support and then I’ve been told by said charities that my child’s issues are ‘too complex’.

I resonate with so many of you. I was gifted but am not functioning where you'd expect me to at all in life and I struggle with the fact I struggle.

Those of you looking at waiting lists consider Right To Choose. This is still NHS (the gp refers) but you have to ask to do it and take in the right forms and evidence. This is Much much quicker than the standard waiting lists and still nice approved etc.

I my case around 4 months instead of 4 years. I should be seen January!

One of my duaghters is diagnosed autistic - at primary school and through NHS.

Other one is diagnosed adhd but privately. I'd have used right to choose if I knew about it then but we had school support and from having all our details ready the appointment was only 2 weeks waiting!! Ithink she is likely Audhd but we aren't yet looking at autism assessment.

I think I'm both. I'm interested in the differences and what makes Audhd look different. Did someone say there was a thread? Can you link me? Or to any other resource as I am sure rim. Both but it's hard to articulate hwy when they're competing drives (well it's exactly my need for order and precision and calm and my complete inability to xlean/cook/provide order and calm thats my downfall.)

This is exactly me! I’m autistic and dyslexic. I’ve never been assessed for ADHD.

My DS is also autistic and dyslexic and currently being assessed for ADHD and what I’m being told in regards to the above is that is an issue with executive functioning which could also be explained by both ASD and by dyslexia. And when I think about it, that does make sense.

I am really sorry to hear you have been going for this.

I agree about the feelings of shame being a big thing.

I have only lived totally alone for short periods in my life, I am really glad I don't live alone now, I remember the first time - I lost 4 stone in weight, was unemployed and in debt and completely unable to manage day to day life. It was extremely confusing to me and hugely impacted my self esteem as I didn't understand why I wasn't able to meet the (objectively minimal) demands of my day to day life. I almost got kicked out for not contributing to the cleaning schedule, in the end I was allowed to stay off it and was essentially totally isolated in my bedsit.

I think knowing I had AuDHD might have helped me then as at least I could have used some strategies to try and feed myself, leave the house etc, and also know that I wasn't totally unemployable I just hadn't yet seen my own strengths or found an environment where they were supported.

Today I have not eaten yet and have just woken up from sleeping again (recovering from burnout). In the past I would have been so angry with myself but I have a bit of self compassion now.

Are you getting medication

Not yet, I haven't gone to the GP to see if I can access it yet. Unfortunately this is the sort of thing I really struggle to manage doing. But I think I would like to try medication as it might help me with some of my day to day tasks.

I am not sure about the thread, I'd also be interested to see it. There is this article about it https://autisticgirlsnetwork.org/audhd/

There are some books about there about the experience of both - how not to fit in, unmasked etc.

Really glad you got your diagnosis? Do you feel having the diagnosis has helped me make peace with things?

Yes, I'm very glad I have it. This may sound dramatic but over the past year or so I had been worried I was very unwell in some way, as my energy and ability to do housework, paperwork, and just generally stay awake was so low. Never mind trying to maintain a social life or leave the house. I am now hopeful that I can start to learn how to manage my energy and the things that deplete it so that I don't end up so burned out in future.

It is also helpful to know that with AuDHD burnout you need rest. Treating burnout the wrong way my whole life has caused a lot of harm

There are working memory and executive dysfunction differences in dyslexia. I am dyslexic and have specific sequencing difficulties, so for a long time I thought my day to day challenges were those things + OCD. But over time I realised there was more to it than that for me.

There are working memory and executive dysfunction differences in dyslexia. I am dyslexic and have specific sequencing difficulties, so for a long time I thought my day to day challenges were those things + OCD. But over time I realised there was more to it than that for me.

Oh I don’t disagree. Like I say I’m autistic and dyslexic myself and at my ASD assessment it was suggested I should consider an assessment for ADHD

I started the thread https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/5228449-whats-the-difference-between-asd-and-audhd?reply=140578016
because I am confused/annoyed that I’m being told it’s likely my DS won’t be given a diagnosis of ADHD as everything can be attributed to his ASD (for example hyperactivity = sensory seeking behaviour, inattention = following own agenda, loosing stuff = executive functioning issues).

The more I think about it, it does make sense to me (although the following own agenda example is a bit of a reach) and I find myself asking is it all autism?
(obviously not talking about ADHD without autism as that clearly is a separate issue)

My main reason for getting DS assessed for ADHD is wanting there to be a medication that helps him (assuming it is ADHD of course) People say ADHD medication can be life changing. From what I’m hearing in the thread though it seems medication is less straightforward when you also have ASD and is not helpful to some anyway.

Yeah I'm not aware of support I can get, I think that one thing that might be helpful is that employers should be more likely to give you reasonable adjustments at work if applicable

My question is how did the assessors distinguish between your autistic traits and your ADHD traits?

Im interested in this too, there’s autism in my family and I show (loads of signs of both and possibly bipolar too- other times I think this can’t be and most people would roll their eyes but I’m very much round peg parallelogram hole😅)

Yeah I'm not aware of support I can get, I think that one thing that might be helpful is that employers should be more likely to give you reasonable adjustments at work if applicable

Yes, I have found it easier to manage at work since I was diagnosed and reasonable adjustments put in place.

But OP is 38, it isn't just happening now. OP has always been audhd.

There were several things they mentioned in my feedback session - such as ADHD not explaining my rigidity and need for sameness, ensuring special interests (ADHD ones usually shorter), differences in social reciprocity, differences in relationships, black and white thinking, and level of sensory sensitivity. I guess executive dysfunction is a feature of both. ADHD is more my inability to control or direct my attention, being very distractible, impulsive, mentally hyperactive, need to move around and can't sit in long meetings or formal settings, etc.

I enjoyed this video. Although, I have found more info about how both interact rather than how you differentiate between the two. There is lots of overlap but there are a few things they look at to see if traits are better explained by one or the other, or if it's both.

This video made me feel 'seen'

I might make a list of books I've found useful shortly as people are asking for resources

Sorry should have said above they mentioned my monotropism and alexithymia as relevant to autism

I think there's more awareness recently. I simply wasn't aware what autism and ADHD really were! I have cousins who are autistic, but they are male and fit a very stereotypical presentation of autism -communication differences which have caused them quite a few challenges throughout life combined with outstanding abilities in coding, physics, those sorts of things. I like and relate to my cousins but never realised we were alike in being autistic as I didn't see examples of autistic women.

My daughters and myself were diagnosed only last year age 39 and 31.
Myself age 65.
All four Grandsons Diagnosed age @ on average 4 to 6 years.
All NHS.
We decided to get officially diagnosed to help in aspects of our adult lives.
Especially my daughters needed for work etc.
We even got a certificate lol.

Books I found helpful (I put my favourites first for each list)

Just to say I haven't been reading ones that get into too much around actual strategies/tips and tricks as I haven't been in the mental space for that - the books I've read have more been focused towards understanding myself and the autistic and ADHD experience

AuDHD
Unmasked by Ellie Middleton
How Not To Fit In by Jess Joy and Charlotte Mia
How to be you by Ellie Middleton

ASD
Spectrum Women (loved this one as so detailed) by Barb Cook
Aspergirls by Rudy Simone

ADHD
Small Talk (about ADHD) by Roxanne and and Richard Pink

I haven't received my full written report back from my ASD assessment yet (I've just had my feedback session so know my diagnosis). Wonder if I will also get a certificate! 😆

For those people who think smart phones causes it.. please educate yourself.. ASD develops in the womb either as an embryo or fetus.
You are born with it .