Just diagnosed with ADHD and Autism

[CrystalMud]

Diagnosed with 'AuDHD' at 38 - AMA!

People are finally understanding neuro divergence.
Surely you can look back at school and think of a couple of kids who were either labelled as naughty or geeky or weird, who would nowadays be recognised as neurodiverse.

What does burn out look like for you?

There are many many things. But I can share some of the more obvious ones -

Executive dysfunction issues make 'doing stuff' generally quite hard. So for example, waking up, getting dressed, eating, any kind of personal care - this would take me a very long time and I would often miss steps or have to find workarounds such as sleeping in my clothes, not eating, not wearing socks, not brushing hair etc. I need routine but I can't seem to ever build one and it's like I have to relearn these processes every day. They're so exhausting I often can't do them.

Sensory issues - a big one, I 'shut down' in places like supermarkets, public transport, big shops, theatres, open plan offices as the sensory input is so overwhelming. Important to say that due to alexithymia I couldn't quite pinpoint exactly why I couldn't cope with those environments until I thought specifically through the sensory experience.

Social differences - I don't know how to make a friend.

My battery is about to die so I'm going to post this but may add to it once charged up

Cannot do forms, paperwork, phonecalls

While I do understand some people have ADHD genetically, it does need to be pointed out that smart phone usage has also been shown to increase ADHD symptoms as it contributes to short attention spans while the brain is growing - literally changes the shape of the brain.

We never should have just allowed everyone to have one without knowing the long term impacts; something that I suspect will be looked back on in a decade with horror.

Do you think you’re born with it or it’s developed due to experiences

I didn't have a smartphone until my late 20s

Your brain doesn't stop growing until you are 25.

Born with it. I can see the same traits in my father although his is perhaps even more extreme in contrast. I read my nursery school report recently and I can recall having the same experiences from a very young age.

Other people maybe seeking advice on how to get an assessment.

I am not sure what your point is. I've always been the same, to the point I've had mental health treatment since childhood due to experiencing mental ill health as a result. Smartphones didn't give me ADHD

Smartphones are a recent thing, so couldn't be used to explain the diagnoses of people in their late 30s and older!

I agree wrt smart phones in general, though.

Slightly off topic but I don't think smartphones are something children should have generally speaking, although I'm thinking more from a mental health and safeguarding perspective.

Significant reduction in functioning, can't manage most tasks of day to day living, can't focus on most things. Total exhaustion and less tolerance for sensory input. Total social isolation. Looks outwardly a lot like depression but cause and way of managing it is differently

I'm late diagnosed AuDHD too. Smartphones are an interesting one as I use them to manage my anxiety and also it also helps me to interact with others in a way that is manageable to me through Mumsnet/social media. It's also a kind of stim for me. Smartphones didn't cause my neurodivergence, they didn't even exist when I was a teenager having shutdowns, refusing school and getting referred to CAMHS.

The biggest part of getting diagnosed for me was feeling both sorry for and in awe of young me. It could have been so different and less of struggle if my neurodivergence had been identified. I was also 'gifted' at school, so I get that bit OP, I am hyperlexic rather than dyslexic too. But I did get through and I have been successful on paper. But the burnout cycle is very obvious in my life. I also knew crying in the car in a supermarket car park because it has been so overwhelming was not a normal thing to do, but I thought I was just anxious and strange.

Main challenge for me now is facing up to the shame I have around who I am and trying to design my life around avoiding burnout now, rather than keep pushing until I can't. Unfortunately it's coincided with perimenopause for me, so underneath everything I am a bit of a fucking mess, but my now partner is very supportive and that helps massively.

I hope you are ok after your diagnosis. It brings up a lot of stuff.

Wow.

Absolutely unnecassary comment, my child is disabled. No need to be such a nasty piece of work.

I'm truly sorry, that must be awful. I hope your family gets the help it needs soon.

I'll gently say that late diagnosed adults also need help and support, not just a label, but I understand it's not anywhere like what your DD needs.

It's not a competition. The OPs diagnosis has nothing to do with your daughter and her needs. I do hope that you and she get the help and support you need though.

Your DD shouldn't need a diagnosis to get help if she is clearly severely disabled. Provision is needs based, not diagnosis based. We all have the option to 'go private' but not everyone has the funds to. That doesn't change the NHS waiting lists.

I think children go through paediatrics, not adult clinics in the NHS. It's different clinicians, funding and waiting list. Adults awaiting assessment wouldn't impact a child who is also awaiting assessment.

Thank you for understanding, she’s under 10 different professionals but still needs help for her autism which she’s on the waiting list for. Yes can’t afford to go private at all.

God I could be you.

I was also treated as mentally ill. I’m a year younger than you but I now suspect autism was the real reason behind a lot of it.

Several generations of girls were let down.