I'm from Denmark, ask me anything you might be curious about

[ScandinavianSummer]

Hello everyone! I'm a (very) long time lurker of Mumsnet, particularly the AMA-section - I thought I'd start a thread of my own in case anyone is curious about my country, Denmark, or anything Danish! I'm happy to answer any question!

You're very welcome!

No, that's not my experience at all. Danes are generally fine with others going on many holidays, spending their money and owning nice things. You don't have to hide your luxury habits and wealth, but bragging about them and advertising for your wealth, that's considered very crude and in bad taste.

@ScandinavianSummer I remember first time we went before we moved there my husband left his woolly hat on top of a ticket machine(a good superdry one) realised 15 minutes later, went back and it was neatly hung up on a hook at the side- in the UK I can almost guarantee it would have been taken.

Haha! I'm glad your son and his girlfriend think we are good looking - I guess we do have that reputation, lol. Yes, I do think Danes are generally tall, but as far as good looks...I guess that's a matter of taste! I think we have a quite distinct look. When I'm on holiday I can immediate spot another Dane from a mile away. The height is definitely a give-away...

Denmark fan here and was lucky enough to visit last summer

Is it true that Danes like to have their heat on high all winter so that they can wander their houses in shorts. If so has any adjustment been made recently with increased energy costs (assuming you also have them!). Here in the Uk most of have been rationing our heating last few years. We put jumpers on.

Are all Danish people nice? 😂 Maybe I’m just incredibly lucky but I’ve never met a Danish person that isn’t lovely!

I am also interested in the Hygge thing. In what ways do you practice Hygge?

No problem - thanks for your curiosity.

That's a very good question. I think a lot of Danes are very against the whale killing tradition from the Faroe Islands, but a lot of us also don't see it as any differently from slaughtering cows and pigs. I think it's one of those things that look absolutely horrendous if you have not grown up with it, and understand the purpose and tradition behind it. A lot of us can't stand to look at regular cow slaughter videos, either, because we have never grown up on a farm and seen animals being slaughtered for food. There are strict regulations around whale killing, but I guess it's up for discussion if they are strict enough.

Also, interfering in the Faroese's culture and tradition is a bit of a sore spot. Although the Faroe Islands are a part of Denmark, the Faroese speak their own language, have a different culture, different traditions, different customs...it's hard to 'interfere' in someone's culture and tell them that what they are doing is wrong, because we don't like their ways. Sure, from an animal welfare perspective it IS Denmark's business, but, as I mentioned, it can be hard to differentiate killing whales for food from killing fish, cows, pigs or chickens for food, and ban one, but not the others.

I'm very sorry to hear that. I think Danes can sometimes come off a bit aloof, and we are generally quite blunt people which people may take offense to. But I wouldn't say Danes go out of their way to be rude to anybody. I hope you were just very unlucky!

You're welcome!

I'm a vegetarian

Will I starve in Denmark?

Do you have many vegetarians and vegans?

Sorry to hear that! As EU citizen can freely travel into Denmark, we have sadly experienced increased issues with Eastern European gangs that come here to scam and pick pocket people. A lot of them do get caught and are banned from returning to Denmark, but it's hard to completely keep them at bay - again, because of the open borders for EU citizens.

I do find Copenhagen expensive, generally, but it's not too bad in some instances. I actually feel like our groceries are cheaper than in the UK, for instance. But something like public transport is extortionate, in my opinion. On the bright side, because Denmark is so expensive, almost anywhere we travel to seems cheap in comparison to our own country, lol.

Do you have different dialects/accents within various parts of Denmark or you can't really tell where others are from? Can you tell someone is Swedish or Norwegian from their accent? Britain/France and Australia/NZ have an unwritten, friendly rivalry. What country do Danes have a friendly rivalry with?

I was in Copenhagen last November and noticed almost everyone, and I do mean everyone, was dressed head to toe in black. Is this a thing?! I felt so conspicuous as I wear bright colors.

Haha, oh, yes, Norwegian is definitely a different language to ours. As is Swedish. In Scandinavia, we like to say that we understand each other, but in reality, Swedes and Norwegians don't understand Danish too well. In writing, sure, but not when we actually speak Danish. On the other hand, Danes are better at understanding both Swedish and Norwegian. In Danish schools pupils have to read and analyse Norwegian and Swedish texts as part of Danish classes. As far as I'm aware, Norwegians and Swedes do not work with Danish texts in their schools.

With that said, Norwegian is so similar to Danish, in writing, that I often read a text in Norwegian and don't realise it isn't a Danish text until a few sentences or paragraphs in. But Swedish is immediately recognisable.

Held og lykke med dine norsk-studier!

That's what I have come to learn! I'm glad having a morgenbitter isn't a tradition in my circles, or anyone I know's circles, lol.

Thanks for reading along!

@ScandinavianSummer thanks for your explanation, I find the idea of mutual intelligibility fascinating and would love to be able to know for real like a scandinavian, the degree of comprehension if that's the right word. I can speak Spanish (and rusty French) and I can understand threads of a conversation in Catalan. But just the gist. I'd love to wake up one morning and realise there's another language I can understand. A weird fantasy.

Great question. Hygge is absolutely a thing for Danes - it's part of our lifestyle, and it's something that's super important to us, every day. I'm reluctant to say we practice hygge, because hygge is actually not an activity as such. In the Danish language hygge is a verb, but it's not a clearly defined action. Because no one can actually determine what hygge is for anybody but themselves. Hygge isn't (necessarily) a collection of pre-determined actions you can do, like sitting in front of a fireplace and lighting candles. Hygge is a feeling or sensation you obtain from doing something enjoyable and cosy (to you). Saying one can practice hygge is like saying someone can practice tired, miserable, happy, awake, etc. You can obtain the feeling of hygge from anything: reading a book, going for a bike ride, baking, going to the cinema. Hygge is achieved by disconnecting from life's stressors, being in mindflow, and being in a state of not feeling burdened, bored, etc. When your mind is free, entertained and light, that's when you are in a state of hygge - or 'doing' hygge. And when activities lead you into that kind of state, then you can describe them with the adjective 'hyggelig'.

When you 'hygge' with other people, there's usually consensus between them all that what they are doing together are 'hyggelig' for everyone involved. Otherwise, they wouldn't be spending this time together.

I hope it all made sense, it's actually quite hard to explain hygge!

Great thread. I’d love to see AMAs from all over the world! I met a lot of Scandinavians while travelling and was so impressed with their grasp of the English language. At what age do you start learning it and do you learn any other languages in school?

Great questions, thank you!

Yes, communal living is pretty normal here, even in the cities. Communes are not unsual here, and you find people from all walks of life living together in communes. I believe commune living is so sough after that there's actually a lack of communes, considering the demand for them. In general, Danes are community-oriented, and you find that most municipalities always arrange local events and activities for families with children and the elderly, in particularly. It's super normal here to be part of various social clubs and groups, particularly sports clubs, where people can have fun, socialise with like-minded and establish friendships and networks.

It's interesting to me that you noticed Danish children's independence. I think it's a core value in most Danish families to teach children responsibility and independence from an early age. Again, when I read on Mumsnet that parents do school runs, even for older children...that's so foreign and incomprehensible to me. Most kids here get to and from school by themselves. They go to school as locally as possible, and they learn the traffic rules at a young age so they know how to navigate the streets and lanes on their bikes. Of course some parents do drop their kids off and pick them up, but I wouldn't say that's the norm. You also often see kids go to and from school with other kids / their class mates.

As for the dish you describe, that's rød grød med fløde, haha. Danes like to ask foreigners to try to pronounce it because, as you mention, it's impossible for them to do it - and Danes think it's absolutely hilarious to hear foreigners struggle to say it, lol. But in reality, no one really eats rød grød med fløde. Maybe the older generation and babies, but probably not even them! I actually do like it, though, It's a strawberry purée with cream poured on top.

I'm glad your husband got his hat back - while there's of course no guarantees you'll get your stuff back if you lose them here, I would say there's a chance that you will. I have lost my purse on several occasions, and have had someone put it in my mailbox when they have found it. Without any of my belongings gone. And I have done the same, too, when I have found purses. Again, we're a quite trusting people and society. You will find in the countryside that people display their homemade jams, organic honey, fruits, berries, vegetables and eggs from their garden outside of their house, unsupervised, with a sign that has their mobile banking details on it, and a box for cash payments. They leave their products unsupervised because there's just trust that people won't steal them. Of course, it does happen sometimes that people steal, but in general, people do the right thing and pay, even if they can get away with not doing it.

I'm so glad you are a fan of my country - I hope you'll come back here again!

I think it's very individual...some people like a very warm home and being able to wear very little at home while others can't tolerate heat and actually like wearing layers. The COL crisis has affected us, too, and people have generally become more mindful of their energy use. Denmark is also all about making society greener and more climate friendly, so for those reasons I would say we are generally mindful of our use, too.

Haha, I'm glad that's your experience of Danes! I think we're generally very nice people, but, of course, there are nice and not so nice people in every nation. But it does sound like you have been lucky to never have met a horrible Dane, haha.

As for hygge, I wrote a bit about it in another post, but to answer how I personally do hygge (because hygge is a very subjective thing)...I do that throughout the whole day in subtle or not so subtle ways. My main hygge-time is before I go to bed. Doing my skincare routine, combing my hair and lying in bed reading or watching sitcoms from the 90s, that's what's hygge to me. Hygge to me can also be Friday afternoons when I bake for my family, and go out for a late night ice cream with them.

Hygge is basically whatever puts you in a state of no stress, entertainment, enjoyment, relaxation and...thankful, even.

I will be honest. Denmark is not the most vegetarian or vegan friendly place. It's a very small part of the population that eat a plant-based diet exclusively, and Danish food is very meat and dairy heavy. With that said, no, you will absolutely not starve. You can easily find vegetarian and vegan options, and there are even restaurants and cafés that are exclusively plant-based. It's hard to find proper Danish food that's vegetarian - and I can't think of a Danish dish that's vegan. But we have a lot of international eateries that do plant-based meals very well.

Also, Denmark's specialties are baked goods and dairy products...on a nice summer day, there's nothing better than buying fresh bread from a bakery, some delicious cheeses, fresh berries and fruits, and some cold beverages from the supermarket to take with you as a picnic to one of the many and accessible beaches, harbours or parks around. You will definitely not struggle as a vegetarian.

Thanks! I liked the rød grød med fløde too - though I had it with mainly raspberries, possibly strawberries as well.

And yes, the communal living - particularly doing things in groups other than families - really seemed to increase independence.