I'm a schizophrenic single parent - AMA

[HerRoyalStressHead]

As the title really.

I'm diagnosed with paranoid Schizophrenia.

I also have depression, autism, Hypermobile ehlers danlos syndrome, fibromyalgia causing a numb right leg... cant feel it at all and de quervains tenosynovitis, which all limit my physical health and movement. I'm in an electric wheelchair due to these, so single parenting is... tricky... but obviously doable as I've been doing it for almost 4 years now.

I have deep admiration for any parent who manages with a mental health diagnosis, yet alone a single parent.

Do you find any support services helpful?

(My ex has the same diagnosis and we co-parent: he and DC attend Kids Time, which is great; I've used carer support and also myself worked for Home Start in the past — I wondered if there are any other organisations that focus on providing support to parents with mental health conditions and/or their children and if you've found them useful/understanding?)

Do you get any warning signs of an episode? How do you juggle parenthood with your own needs?

For me the community mental health team have been amazing. I was signed off from the early intervention in psychosis team a while ago and was GP managed but found I was struggling with that, so I self referred back into mental health services. The CMHT are great, I'm not assigned a key worker as such yet but I do have a worker who deals with the waiting list and she comes out once a month and is helping me navigate social services input to get occupational therapy to agree to adapt my house.

The schools are also amazing and the younger two children's school have them in play therapy once a week to navigate their feelings surrounding my mental health and their feelings around contact with their dad, which has been rocky. The teenager is completely unbuffered by anything at the minute, but the opportunity for therapy is there through school should he need it, and they have a therapy dog which he loves but doesn't feel he needs any support at the minute.

There are local organisations too which have been helpful for me to reach out to when I'm struggling and I find they really listen and try their best to support me without affirming my delusions, which is understandably, rather difficult when someone's in the middle of a mental break.

I hear voices all the time but I know if I'm getting worse as I have more than one voice or it increases in frequency, so in a way yes I do get warning signs.

It can be difficult to juggle my jeeds and the children's needs at times, but the kids come first, but sometimes it also means they have to hold off on going to the park because mums paranoia os kicking in and if I take them I may break, and they understand that, luckily they're a little bit older now so they know if I say "no, I just need to get home" it's because I'm struggling and need my safe space. But I also make sure they don't miss out on opportunities and do as much as I'm able to with them so that they can still be kids.

The play therapy, therapy dog and other support sound really good. I think what's available varies a lot depending on area.

We had a therapy dog too (for my ex) — he passed away sadly last year aged 17, a long and happy life, the sweetest dog ever.

I'd love my own support dog, unfortunately I have 3 cats! One of which is a semi feral and terrified of dogs so it wouldn't be fair on him. But I do long for a dog. Maybe in a few years once all the cats are gone.

Ours was wonderful. My ex couldn't go out alone much (due to voices and intrusive thoughts) before we got him, but having the cutest dog in the universe meant suddenly lots of people in the streets and parks were really friendly and smiled, said hello. It really helped my ex meet people and feel comfortable going on long walks, kept him healthy. As well as keeping him company at home.

I can imagine it was a very freeing experience for him. I used to have a GSD, and he was the cutest, fluffiest dog ever. Always got comments on him and people were so friendly, especially other dog owners. Made me realise not everyone was out to get me!