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AMA
Original poster

I'm a neonatal intensive care nurse AMA

50 replies

skinnytobe · 07/08/2023 15:18

In view of the news of a very public trial of a neonatal nurse

Please ask me anything I will do my best to answer

5 years in a level three surgical unit

OP posts:
Permanentlyfrazzled · 07/08/2023 15:22

No questions, but just wanted to say thank you for all you do. My son is a 26 weeker ex prem and NICU nurses are incredible human beings 💙💜

PimpMyFridge · 08/08/2023 12:52

Thank you for all you do.

riverlodge90 · 08/08/2023 12:53

Guess the major question is do you think LL is guilty or innocent and why?

AmbleInAnnBoleyn · 08/08/2023 12:55

Thank you for all your kindness and professionalism. One of my babies was a SCBU baby. We remain truly grateful for the skills of the neonatal team, a quarter of a century on.

No questions, just gratitude.

Bananaspliff · 08/08/2023 12:57

Just another thank you from another mum of an NICU graduate

theotherfossilsister · 08/08/2023 13:09

Thank you so much. You do amazing work. We were discharged today last year after an eighteen day stay. I know lots are in for much longer.

Nubnut · 08/08/2023 13:14

I have a question: what do you think of this new research and work that's all about trying to make the NICU a better developmental environment for babies, for example, finding ways for NICU babies to be breastfed if possible?

Does it feel like it's all too much on top of keeping them alive? Or does it feel like someone is finally putting into practice what you know would be better, if you had the resources? Or something else?

Thank you for your work.

BusterGonad · 08/08/2023 13:15

I have a question, is there any link to pre term birth and autism? Say a 28 weeker?

CrispAppleStrudels · 08/08/2023 13:15

My daughter spent 4 days in NICU, 7days in SCBU with GBS sepsis in 2021. I found all the nurses generally to be brilliant but i remember on day 5 trying to establish bfing and every single nurse that day gave me different and contradictory advice. I remember so clearly bursting into tears because it was just too much on top of everything else that i didnt know what i was supposed to be doing. What sort of training do you have for bfing and how often do you all review / update etc? Same goes for advice on car seats - a nurse had to sign off a car seat check but ive subsequently realised that my daughter wasn't really in a safe position at all and there would have been much better seats to buy for a tiny baby. Do you get any special car seat training?

skinnytobe · 08/08/2023 17:38

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Original poster
skinnytobe · 08/08/2023 17:39

Nubnut · 08/08/2023 13:14

I have a question: what do you think of this new research and work that's all about trying to make the NICU a better developmental environment for babies, for example, finding ways for NICU babies to be breastfed if possible?

Does it feel like it's all too much on top of keeping them alive? Or does it feel like someone is finally putting into practice what you know would be better, if you had the resources? Or something else?

Thank you for your work.

We've been raising this since Covid. We are SO short staffed and have been for over two years (we should have 17-21 nurses on a shift, most shifts are 10/11/12.

But. We have also just appointed two senior breast feeding nurses who solely do that 4 days a week then one clinical shift.

We didn't have much training until recently!

OP posts:
Original poster
skinnytobe · 08/08/2023 17:40

BusterGonad · 08/08/2023 13:15

I have a question, is there any link to pre term birth and autism? Say a 28 weeker?

I couldn't answer that, once the babies leave the unit we don't really see their progress!

OP posts:
Original poster
skinnytobe · 08/08/2023 17:41

CrispAppleStrudels · 08/08/2023 13:15

My daughter spent 4 days in NICU, 7days in SCBU with GBS sepsis in 2021. I found all the nurses generally to be brilliant but i remember on day 5 trying to establish bfing and every single nurse that day gave me different and contradictory advice. I remember so clearly bursting into tears because it was just too much on top of everything else that i didnt know what i was supposed to be doing. What sort of training do you have for bfing and how often do you all review / update etc? Same goes for advice on car seats - a nurse had to sign off a car seat check but ive subsequently realised that my daughter wasn't really in a safe position at all and there would have been much better seats to buy for a tiny baby. Do you get any special car seat training?

We now have annual training, but only a recent thing on our unit! Plus online training.

But we honestly struggle for time with being so short staffed. It's horrible for us to know we can't give that support too 😩

OP posts:
Nevermay · 08/08/2023 17:43

wow- you are amazing!
Do you ever go home and cry? Do you ever think a baby is so damaged it is not in their best interests to try to keep them alive? Do newborns show much differences in character? WHat is the longest a family has kept in touch with you?

TomatoSandwiches · 08/08/2023 17:51

CrispAppleStrudels · 08/08/2023 13:15

My daughter spent 4 days in NICU, 7days in SCBU with GBS sepsis in 2021. I found all the nurses generally to be brilliant but i remember on day 5 trying to establish bfing and every single nurse that day gave me different and contradictory advice. I remember so clearly bursting into tears because it was just too much on top of everything else that i didnt know what i was supposed to be doing. What sort of training do you have for bfing and how often do you all review / update etc? Same goes for advice on car seats - a nurse had to sign off a car seat check but ive subsequently realised that my daughter wasn't really in a safe position at all and there would have been much better seats to buy for a tiny baby. Do you get any special car seat training?

I experienced the same, unfortunately some nurses contributed negatively to the really awful situation we as a family found ourselves in.

Original poster
skinnytobe · 08/08/2023 17:56

Nevermay · 08/08/2023 17:43

wow- you are amazing!
Do you ever go home and cry? Do you ever think a baby is so damaged it is not in their best interests to try to keep them alive? Do newborns show much differences in character? WHat is the longest a family has kept in touch with you?

I often go home and cry. Most shifts lately. Sometimes because of a death. Mostly because we are short staffed I know that the babies I've been looking after haven't had the quality care they should have. But I did my best.

My unit takes babies born from 22 weeks. So yes, very often we as a nursing team think we do too much which prolongs their suffering in our opinion. But we are often guided by what the consultants and parents have discussed.

OP posts:
Original poster
skinnytobe · 08/08/2023 17:57

@Nevermay

I'm still in touch with a family of a little 27 weeker who's now 5 years old :)

All babies have their own little character I think! But the teeny prem girls are very feisty!

OP posts:
Nevermay · 08/08/2023 18:01

skinnytobe · 08/08/2023 17:56

I often go home and cry. Most shifts lately. Sometimes because of a death. Mostly because we are short staffed I know that the babies I've been looking after haven't had the quality care they should have. But I did my best.

My unit takes babies born from 22 weeks. So yes, very often we as a nursing team think we do too much which prolongs their suffering in our opinion. But we are often guided by what the consultants and parents have discussed.

Show quote history

wow, thank you for carrying on with the job. I am sorry you go home crying so often, I would expect it occasionally is such an intensive and emotional situation, but it sounds like it is really taking it out of you

I have more questions, do you have lot of twins? We had premature twins in my family 18 months ago, and didn't think they would make it, but they have. One has cerebral palsy but is so bright and alert and vocal the she is clearly going to have a great quality of life, even if she never walks, or walks badly.

It seems to me that a lot more twins are born these days, maybe because of IVF, or more knowledge about how to keep twins pregnancies going, but that twins seem to have more problems.

Also, have you been on strike - don't answer that if you don't want to, but if you feel able, it would be interesting to hear your take on the situation

tellmethetruthplease · 08/08/2023 18:01

Do staff ever feel suspicious or judgemental of mothers whose children arrive very prem and at very low birth weight? Please answer honestly, not how things 'should' be. I was in this situation with my 30 weeker, and we had a disastrous time with some NNU staff.

Original poster
skinnytobe · 08/08/2023 18:04

@Nevermay we have a lot of twins! We've had quads and triplets in the same week this year! Lots of 28 -35 weeker twins who generally all do ok though!

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riverlodge90 · 08/08/2023 18:06

@skinnytobe thank you for responding!
It's nice to get some insight from someone in the role, as many judgements have been made without the knowledge of how the system actually works.

Original poster
skinnytobe · 08/08/2023 18:06

Also never been on strike. As an intensive care unit we were always told we couldn't, which is fine, I was never on shift on the strike days so far.

I do think the pay is crap. Though. But I never went into it for the money. When I was a single mum to 3 children before I met and moved in with my DP.

My salary wasn't enough to live on but I just earned over the threshold to not qualify for government help too. Which mean I switched to nights and weekends to bump up my pay,

OP posts:
FTMFML · 08/08/2023 18:06

Why are the units all so understaffed at the moment?
Im in another area of nursing at the minute and interested i applying for a post in neonates, why did you choose neonates? 😊 TYIA

Original poster
skinnytobe · 08/08/2023 18:07

tellmethetruthplease · 08/08/2023 18:01

Do staff ever feel suspicious or judgemental of mothers whose children arrive very prem and at very low birth weight? Please answer honestly, not how things 'should' be. I was in this situation with my 30 weeker, and we had a disastrous time with some NNU staff.

I never have! There's many many reasons babys are born small for their dates! I had an Iugr baby myself at 21 and was very judged! So I know what you mean though! But I think because I've also been on the other side I know what it feels like

OP posts:
Original poster
skinnytobe · 08/08/2023 18:09

FTMFML · 08/08/2023 18:06

Why are the units all so understaffed at the moment?
Im in another area of nursing at the minute and interested i applying for a post in neonates, why did you choose neonates? 😊 TYIA

In all honesty. In my opinion, we are losing experienced staff because they are grunt out/ under so much pressure and the newly qualified nurses that come through the door, leave quickly because we lack experienced staff to take care of the sick sick babies and they are being put in the situation so early on with no training other than support from us experienced nurses.

I never looked after a ventilated baby until I was over two years qualified now we have nurses qualified 6 months to a year already being thrown in at the deep end!

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