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I home educate my DS - AMA

54 replies

StudentNurse3 · 22/09/2022 11:33

My DS has been home educated from the start. He is 15 now.

OP posts:
Saracen · 24/09/2022 00:06

I home educate my teen too, but that doesn't stop me being nosy about other people's experiences! 😆

Did you have a partner when you started home ed? If so, were they on board with the idea from the beginning? How has that worked out? Are you always in agreement about how to home educate? How much input does your son have into the details of how he is educated?

Does your son have a particular talent, and if so how have you helped him develop it?

Your expectations about what home ed would be like for your family were probably very different when your ds was four. What has surprised you most about it?

OhMaria2 · 24/09/2022 19:09

I have a baby son and I am interested in home schooling. Where do I start?
Did you find it plain sailing or were there ups and downs?

Eileen101 · 24/09/2022 19:10

Do you feel like you can do it justice? I feel like there's no way I could provide a rounded education covering all

Comedycook · 24/09/2022 19:10

Do you work?

Eileen101 · 24/09/2022 19:11

Oops * all the things they'd learn in school, or even the basics of the main subjects.

TERFwithAcat · 24/09/2022 19:12

Do you have any regrets about it?

wishing3 · 24/09/2022 19:15

What made you want to do it?
Do you get regulated eg OFSTED ?
How much time a day do you spend on formal sit down lessons on average (I guess didfoat different ages)?
Do you think your son will do better academically as a result of your 1:1? Do you think he is happier?
Does he go lots of groups to make friends and how are his social skills?
Do you find it boring?

sorry for so many questions-find it very interesting!

BeanieTeen · 24/09/2022 19:38

Why did you decide to home educate?
How does your son feel about being home educated?
What do you teach? And how and why do you decide what you teach?

StudentNurse3 · 24/09/2022 19:40

Saracen · 24/09/2022 00:06

I home educate my teen too, but that doesn't stop me being nosy about other people's experiences! 😆

Did you have a partner when you started home ed? If so, were they on board with the idea from the beginning? How has that worked out? Are you always in agreement about how to home educate? How much input does your son have into the details of how he is educated?

Does your son have a particular talent, and if so how have you helped him develop it?

Your expectations about what home ed would be like for your family were probably very different when your ds was four. What has surprised you most about it?

Please, nose away! ☺️

Yes, I was married to my DS's dad. He was supportive of my decision to home educate but has never really got involved except sometimes taking him to things. It would have been nice for him to be more involved, but that's just the way he is. He doesn't really have an opinion about how I home educate. When my DS was little I was very much child-led. As he's got older we've got more structured but decisions about his education have always been made in partnership.

My DS used to be very into karate and he was able to do all the classes he liked and all the courses and competitions because we didn't have to worry about school. Now he is an avid reader and again he has all the time he wants to read because not having to worry about getting up early for school. He's also very talented with computer things that I don't even really understand. And again, it's just been about giving him the time to follow his interest.

I suppose there's been quite a few surprises along the way! The first was how big the home-ed community was in our city. I thought it would just be an odd few families! And I think I was surprised how diverse the community is too. I think the next thing to suprise me was how children learn when you just follow their lead. Seeing my son and his friends learn to read so easily when all my friends with DC at school were struggling with having to do reading practice with them every night after a full day at school. And then I suppose I'm surprised by how much things change and evolve as they get older. Home-ed now is completely different to when we first started or even to a couple of years ago.

OP posts:
Reluctantadult · 24/09/2022 19:42

What was your main reason?

AncientMariner · 24/09/2022 19:45

Is your 15 year old taking GCSEs, if so which ones?

Italianmamami · 24/09/2022 19:48

I tried home educating ds 9 and it was awful. My experience was bad due to my son needing the constant routine of school and socialising. He is really sociable and we struggled to provide the same socialisation that school does. I have found him a place in a school setting but that was a nightmare and to be honest I don’t think the education department are that keen to place sen children in school and the school were not that eager to offer him a place. I was left disheartened by the school system

StudentNurse3 · 24/09/2022 19:49

OhMaria2 · 24/09/2022 19:09

I have a baby son and I am interested in home schooling. Where do I start?
Did you find it plain sailing or were there ups and downs?

I'd have a look at the website Education Otherwise for the basics. Then I would try to find the home-ed community in your area. There are often Facebook groups. Then find a meet-up that would be suitable to attend with your little one (maybe wait til he's a toddler as there are often 'play group' type meet ups that he could join in with) and get to know other home educators and chat about what there is going on in your area and how they've found it. In my area there is loads going on but I imagine it would be a different experience if there wasn't.

There have definitely been ups and downs! There have definitely been wobbles now and again - I think everyone gets them! I think it is so important to have fellow home educators around to support you. At times it can feel the best thing in the world and at others in can feel quite overwhelming being in charge of all the details of your DC's education. Good luck with whatever you decide.

OP posts:
StudentNurse3 · 24/09/2022 19:58

Eileen101 · 24/09/2022 19:10

Do you feel like you can do it justice? I feel like there's no way I could provide a rounded education covering all

Yes, but not on my own! I mean academically I feel I can provide all the basics. But then beyond that classes, groups, trips come in. So for example he has gone to Science classes, a gardening group and trips to a STEM college and an outward bounds camp. Over the years he has done so many diverse things, much more than he would have done in school, tbh.

OP posts:
StudentNurse3 · 24/09/2022 20:00

Comedycook · 24/09/2022 19:10

Do you work?

Yes, I'm a nurse. I didn't work much until my DS was 7, though.

OP posts:
Psychopomps · 24/09/2022 20:00

But why? Does he have educational needs you felt wouldn’t be met by school? Do you work?

Psychopomps · 24/09/2022 20:01

Sorry, cross-post.

5zeds · 24/09/2022 20:07

Does he have additional needs? What proportion of the home Ed kids you know (just count the ones you’ve seen in the last couple of weeks) have additional needs?

StudentNurse3 · 24/09/2022 20:08

TERFwithAcat · 24/09/2022 19:12

Do you have any regrets about it?

Not really. I do wonder if he would have been ok in a school from Y10 and it would have taken some of the pressure off me! Once he got to GCSE age it was like 'shit just got real!' 😂 But I suppose he was settled and thriving and I didn't really want to mess with that.

OP posts:
FruitPastilleNut · 24/09/2022 20:09

Why?

Hermione101 · 24/09/2022 20:10

Is he encouraged to learn and study things that he finds difficult or uninteresting? Or is it all child-led?

StudentNurse3 · 24/09/2022 20:39

wishing3 · 24/09/2022 19:15

What made you want to do it?
Do you get regulated eg OFSTED ?
How much time a day do you spend on formal sit down lessons on average (I guess didfoat different ages)?
Do you think your son will do better academically as a result of your 1:1? Do you think he is happier?
Does he go lots of groups to make friends and how are his social skills?
Do you find it boring?

sorry for so many questions-find it very interesting!

Please, ask away, I'm happy to answer 😊

So, the reason I chose to home-educate was because my son is autistic. At age 4 he was not ready for school atall on an emotional level. He was very intelligent, though. His health visitor asked me if I'd thought about it when he was 3 and I started looking in to it.

No, you do not get regulated by OFSTED or any other body. In law, parents are responsible to educate their DC either by delegating to school or otherwise.

My DS is now in Y11. He goes to college 3 days a week. At home he is studying for GCSEs in Eng Lit, Sociology and History. I spend 2 hours a week per subject with him. He then probably spends 1-2 hours per subject per week studying on his own. When he was Primary age I did very little formal work and it just gradually increased as he got older.

I think lots of 1:1 is beneficial. My hope is that he will reach his potential. He has already done a couple of GCSEs and did very well.

He was happier when younger being with me (I tried nursery and it was a disaster!) Lots of autistic DC come into the home-ed community from school where school did not suit their DC and made them very unhappy. I think that would have been my DS's fate too. I think he could cope with school now but I think now he is happier having the flexibility of home ed and not having to get up super-early (for a teen!) every morning.

He used to go to lots of groups before he started college. He has a nice circle of friends that he's collected along the way. His bestie he has known since they met as toddlers at a home-ed group. She started at college with him. He also has other friends that he made over the years from home-ed or other activities (Cubs etc) and he has made new friends at college. I think his social skills are pretty good, but of course autistic people do struggle with social skills. He prefers a smaller group or 1:1. He doesn't always want to socialise but he has a nice group of friends so I'm happy.

In general, I've not found it boring. When the DC are younger it is very social and I made good friends within the home-ed community. I'm quite academic so have enjoyed learning alongside my DS and passing on my knowledge. I've also found it interesting learning about how DC learn and watching them learn. All the trips were fascinating too, but now he's older we don't do that kind of thing as much - they start doing things on their own as they get older. So it is more boring now as I don't get to see people/places anywhere near as much.

OP posts:
StudentNurse3 · 24/09/2022 20:47

BeanieTeen · 24/09/2022 19:38

Why did you decide to home educate?
How does your son feel about being home educated?
What do you teach? And how and why do you decide what you teach?

I explained above that I decided to home educate as my DS is autistic.

My DS likes being home educated, but it's all he's known of course. He does look at teens in ties and blazers and having to be up early every morning with pity!

I'm educating my DS in English Lit, History and Sociology at the moment. He did his English and Maths GCSEs last year and is doing Computer Science and Science GCSEs this year at college. My DS picked which GCSEs he wanted to study after looking at A level options and of course I

OP posts:
StudentNurse3 · 24/09/2022 20:50

gave him my advice too. When he was very young I just followed his lead and gradually added in some academics as he got older trying to expose him to a wide range of subjects. I also taught him lots of practical things like cooking.

OP posts:
Hotandbothereds · 24/09/2022 20:52

StudentNurse3 · 24/09/2022 20:00

Yes, I'm a nurse. I didn't work much until my DS was 7, though.

Do you work now? How have you provided financially if you haven’t worked full time and have focussed on home education?

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