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Original poster

I've just come out of private rehab - AMA

50 replies

DonnieDark · 09/10/2021 23:06

Sobriety is pretty boring right now so if anyone's interested in the inner workings of a very expensive private rehab, ask away!

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MichelleScarn · 09/10/2021 23:10

How much did it cost and what's the assessment process? Is there one or is it just you pay and is ok?

Xiaoxiong · 09/10/2021 23:11

Firstly - amazing and so proud of you for choosing a sober future.

What made you decide to go to rehab?

Original poster
DonnieDark · 09/10/2021 23:12

The first month was in a psych hospital and 28 days cost 24k - thankfully my insurance covered that. Then I spent another month in secondary care, which is a house full of addicts, insurance wouldn't cover that so it cost me 6k.

As long as they have a bed and you can pay up front you can go basically.

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MichelleScarn · 09/10/2021 23:13

Wow, are you uk op? And also well done for completing rehab

Original poster
DonnieDark · 09/10/2021 23:14

@Xiaoxiong thank you 😊 I'm quite proud I got through it!

I had liver failure and internal bleeding but wasn't able to detox safely without medical supervision so I had to go really. I'd been asking for help for a year beforehand but the NHS services just never returned my calls...

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Original poster
DonnieDark · 09/10/2021 23:16

@MichelleScarn I'm doing ok so far thanks - it's not easy but after 25 years of using my body was wrecked and I needed to get well for my DS.

Really appreciate such supportive replies!

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PassTheDutchyUpYrLeftBackside · 09/10/2021 23:16

Hi OP,

Hope you are feeling better.

What circumstances meant that being admitted as an in patient was needed?

user1000000000009 · 09/10/2021 23:16

Well done for completing it!!

How do you feel?

RagzReturnsRebooted · 09/10/2021 23:17

Firstly, well done!

What's the food like? Did you have lots of interesting activities and classes? Were the staff good?

PotatoBreadsticks · 09/10/2021 23:19

Any advice for someone who cannot afford to go into private care (or any care for that matter)?

MichelleScarn · 09/10/2021 23:20

[quote DonnieDark]@MichelleScarn I'm doing ok so far thanks - it's not easy but after 25 years of using my body was wrecked and I needed to get well for my DS.

Really appreciate such supportive replies![/quote]
donnie after 25 years even more of a bloody fantastic you! Every day is a new day now!

Original poster
DonnieDark · 09/10/2021 23:21

@PassTheDutchyUpYrLeftBackside I may have covered that in my last post bit if you want me to expand on anything I'm very happy to.

Right now I feel a bit out of sorts but certainly loads better than I did. I thought I was going to die in the last few days and was forcing down alcohol and opiates purely to stop withdrawals but vomiting it all back up. It was pretty horrific tbh.

The hardest thing is having to actually feel my emotions without being able to escape - my use was self-medicating for past trauma, ADHD, PTSD, depression/anxiety and autism and I've had a pretty crazy life so now I'm out and spending a lot of time alone (I don't go back to work until January) I find it tough to motivate myself to do much and feel restless and bored a lot.

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SouthOfFrance · 09/10/2021 23:22

Well done Op!

What was the final push you needed to go through with the treatment?

What has been your lowest point during the treatment?

Did you like the others you were living with/in groups with?

What's your plan for the future and how will you stay sober?

Hope all goes well from here Flowers

SouthOfFrance · 09/10/2021 23:24

Just seen your last msg, so another one, how do you plan to fill the time between now and January? Are you tempted to go back to work early?

Original poster
DonnieDark · 09/10/2021 23:24

@RagzReturnsRebooted I'm vegan so the chefs weren't really that great at the start but I got them to give me something other than beans eventually. I have an eating disorder too so food is always a bit of an issue.

Some staff were amazing but there was a lot of drama and complaints, bank staff giving out the wrong meds and the fire alarm constantly going off at night. I guess it's to be expected when you have a building full of addicts and people with severe mental illness bunched together though. There were definitely staff that everyone hated!

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KingsleyShacklebolt · 09/10/2021 23:25

Have you read "Rachel's Holiday" by Marian Keyes? It's all about a young woman who goes into rehab thinking it's sort of like a spa break, and discovering it's really not.

Excellent book though.

Original poster
DonnieDark · 09/10/2021 23:27

Sorry forgot to add about the timetable - I was on a specialised addiction treatment programme so we had stuff from 9.30am until 4pm every day except Sunday, which started with group therapy, then things like art therapy, watching videos, ex patient shares, horse therapy (that was pretty weird), then optional relaxation and exercise. We also had a weekly walk outside the grounds and addict meetings online.

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Original poster
DonnieDark · 09/10/2021 23:29

@PotatoBreadsticks I think it depends on your drug of choice - some withdrawals can't be done at home for instance. I don't know if this helps at all but I raised the money for my second month partly through via crowdfunder.

NHS access seems like a postcode lottery but worth looking up what's in your area through your GP.

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Original poster
DonnieDark · 09/10/2021 23:38

@SouthOfFrance

Well done Op!

What was the final push you needed to go through with the treatment?

What has been your lowest point during the treatment?

Did you like the others you were living with/in groups with?

What's your plan for the future and how will you stay sober?

Hope all goes well from here Flowers

The final push was being completely unable to function and having a seizure at a friend's house, which scared her to death.

I had functioned fairly well up until I didn't! I started blacking out during the day and forgetting work meetings, and it all became completely unmanageable.

The lowest point was the first few days when I couldn't walk or talk properly. I don't remember much of that but someone had to gold my head up for me...

I made some friends for life but there was one or two who caused drama, it's like the Big Brother house!

My only plan is to keep going to meetings and having therapy, I do a sport I want to get back to but I've lost a lot of weight so I'm still physically not there yet.

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Original poster
DonnieDark · 09/10/2021 23:41

@SouthOfFrance

Just seen your last msg, so another one, how do you plan to fill the time between now and January? Are you tempted to go back to work early?
As bored as I am I know going back early would be a mistake, I'm spending time with my DS and my DP, walking the dog and doing DIY. I had grand plans to write a book and I also write music but I haven't felt inspired yet. It's taking time to adjust to building a routine and getting used to all the meds I'm on so I'm not beating myself up too much about it.
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Original poster
DonnieDark · 09/10/2021 23:42

@KingsleyShacklebolt

Have you read "Rachel's Holiday" by Marian Keyes? It's all about a young woman who goes into rehab thinking it's sort of like a spa break, and discovering it's really not.

Excellent book though.

I'll check that out - I think that's most people's idea of private rehabs!
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AnnieSnap · 09/10/2021 23:44

Well done @DonnieDark You have clearly been down a very tough road. My husband is an alcoholic (not as far gone as you were, but well on his way). Thankfully, he has now been sober for 2 1/2 years. He went through a 12 week rehab, followed by weekly continuing care meetings for a few weeks (then we went on holiday & Covid had hit when we got back). Amazingly, his rehab was provided by a joint NHS/Charity programme. It was not residential, but participants had to be there 8 hours a day, starting at 9am and AA several evenings a week.

Original poster
DonnieDark · 09/10/2021 23:47

@AnnieSnap

Well done *@DonnieDark* You have clearly been down a very tough road. My husband is an alcoholic (not as far gone as you were, but well on his way). Thankfully, he has now been sober for 2 1/2 years. He went through a 12 week rehab, followed by weekly continuing care meetings for a few weeks (then we went on holiday & Covid had hit when we got back). Amazingly, his rehab was provided by a joint NHS/Charity programme. It was not residential, but participants had to be there 8 hours a day, starting at 9am and AA several evenings a week.
So glad your husband got the help he needed and definitely much better not to get to the point I did.

It's especially hard for the families of addicts so I hope you've had support too?

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Classica · 09/10/2021 23:53

The very best of luck to you, OP. Sounds like you've been through the wringer. So often addiction seems to be self-medication as a result of past trauma or undiagnosed depression.

Assuming he's a child, how did you explain your absence to your son?

Also, do you need to cut contact with your old social circle in order to avoid slipping back?

jelly79 · 09/10/2021 23:54

Well done to you!! You should be so proud of yourself OP!

Can I ask, did you lose any friends along the way? Was there anything anyone could of done to help you sooner?