In a ethically non monogamous marriage

[SE6London]

Just recently opened up our marriage. Anyone with questions and or previous experiences?

What was your motivation OP? I wish you well. I have some long ago experience of a chaotic kind of non-monogamy, but it won't be similar, just makes me interested in how people do it now.
I'm talking the 1970s and 80s.

Are both of you interested in seeing other people or just one of you?

We are just doing the same thing - very early days, but dp and I haven't had sex for over 15 years, are raising our dc in a loving, platonic friendship relationship and have recently agreed that I can see other people. I have been fine with a platonic relationship until the last few years, when I've been lonely and miserable.

We discussed separating and it may come to that eventually, but he has said he would rather I fulfilled the side of me that isn't happy and for us to stay together than for me to leave. He has no sex drive and no desire to see anyone else.

I haven't met anyone yet, but there is someone who I know who is potentially someone who might be interested in me. I'm taking the idea slowly.

OP - can I ask how the conversation went between you and whether you've agreed any 'rules' to telling each other details about other encounters. This is the bit I get stuck on when I start to think it through - how much to tell dp?

How do you keep jealousy at bay?

What is an ‘ethically non monogamous marriage’?

Why have you decided to do that?

Well it was on both of our minds to be honest. Talking about our relationship and our needs, wants, desires and such. It is early on in this journey but I think for us it makes sense.

You've not really explained why...
Is it that you just find monogomy boring? Or you have a huge desire to have sex with other people? Have 3 somes?
What exactly have you done it FOR?

Why have you made this decision? And how much do you plan on sharing with your other half?
What about jealousy or guilt? How do you keep those at bay?

We haven't set out on this with seeing other people in mind. But if someone comes along, a crush, a feeling and either of us wanted to make a move on that then they are free to do as they wish. It's a two way thing. We aren't each others property. For me I can't see how being with someone from your 20s/30s can work. But thats my opinion. For many sure its possible but each to their own I guess. Relationships evolve and this is where we are at at the moment.

We aren't each others property.

Are you insinuating that those in a monogomous relationship view each other as property?

Are you the man?

And is this an advertisement? 😂 noting your username...!

Are you using protection 🤔 would you be openly bringing someone into your joint home or?

Why do you think your sex life is of any interest to anyone else ?

Have you discussed what would happen if jealousy comes up at some point?

So you aren't actually in one yet? Bit of a non thread really.