Hi,
I'm just looking for some honest opinions on my current situation or some advice.
My partners brother who we will call harry has just recently moved in with me & my partner temporarily to our rented house as he and his girlfriend who we will call Sally have just bought their first house and are in the process of renovating it. He was renting off a friend but this friend is kicking him out as he wants to sell the house.
My partner told him he could move in with us without really speaking to me properly about it first. He also agreed with him that he would only need to pay us £100 a month.
If Harry wasnt such a pain in the bum maybe I could see it as we are doing him a favour helping him save towards their new house BUT since first getting together with sally he has non stop bragged to me and my partner about the amount of money they are both on between them, about the size of the engagement ring he plans on getting her worth 9 grand! He once booked her the same hotel we stayed in and told us it was the best room there! (Course it was !), The 'lets face it me and Sally will be having kids before you two" comment was also massively insensitive. The list is endless. You just couldn't write some of the stuff he comes out with.
Me and my partner are very happy and we do try and rise above these comments. Sally has offloaded several times to me before about how awfully he treats her so I know its not as amazing as he makes out but I'm a student and my partner has only been in his career 2 years so money is very tight and things like marriage a house and kids are on hold until we can afford it so we dont appreciate him saying these things. It's so massively insensitive!!!
I was also working with Sally for 4 months doing some work for her for some extra cash but this then suddenly stopped right before Christmas. She told me they where no longer able to take bank staff which to be honest I find very hard to believe when they are in their busiest period.
This all then brings me back to the living situation!! Why on earth when me and my partner are struggling for money would harry even think to ask if he could move in with us for £100 a month?! Not only that he was only living with us for a day before sally was texting me asking if she could stay over too !!! Meanwhile shes also posting pictures of her brand new BMW on instagram and they have booked a cottage away in the lakes for new years and are going for nice meals every weekend. So it's so nice to know that extra money hes saving is going towards their new house!! Sally has also got herself a personal trainer which much be costing a fortune, and harry tonight has been telling me how much money hes spending on her for christmas which is obscene.
I suppose I'm frustrated with the whole situation because why is it me and my partner are helping them when they are both loaded, have bought their first house and are still able to do all these nice things - they are basically set for life yet me and my partner are being massively inconvenienced, arent getting any help whatsoever and they really dont seem to give one to be honest!! I'm sick of going into social media and seeing the fact they've booked these fancy trips away or a new car and we struggle to even buy toilet roll. (Slight exaggeration!) I cant help feeling resentful towards sally for the whole bank shift situation too because shes really screwed me over with that one and it wouldn't surprise me if it was all a lie. To make it worse shes going to come in with a big sack of presents for my partners family and I'll be there with my stocking of poundland presents. I know it's the thought that counts but after everything its just something else being rubbed in my face!
The amount of arguments this is causing between me and my partner is ridiculous. He keeps telling me to ask for more money off harry if I'm so bothered but I hate confrontation and i just feel like it would be better coming from my partner since they are brothers ! I just cant get my head around how they even think this is acceptable. I also dont understand why his mum isnt offering him to stay at hers especially since money isnt an issue for her and their stepdad and they've even just recently done up the spare room. It's just a joke and I'm getting so angry and frustrated by it but I feel completely powerless to do anything about it. I feel like everyone is just taking me and my partner for mugs and its not right.
Any advice on how to deal with this would be great!!