GregoryPeckingDuck
Is you name Todd?
Yes, that is my first name.
SeaweedDress
She won’t let me set for mediocrity, and that was what was hurting our marriage in the beginning. She knows how to get the best out of me.
Why were you 'mediocre'? Why can't you get the best out of yourself? Do you think that it's a woman's job to 'make something' of her husband? You make yourself sound like a difficult horse being intensively schooled in the hope that eventually he'll be a decent ride.
Thanks SeaweedDress for responding and asking those questions. Answering your last question first, no, I don’t think it’s the wife’s job to make something out of her husband. Nor do I think it is the husband’s job to make something out of his wife. But, I do believe the both parties have an obligation to help enhance/ strengthen their partners if possible. Everyone has strengthens and weaknesses, when we get a partner, IME, that partner helps cover or smooth out our weaknesses, not always, but usually. Unfortunately there is a down side to this also in that, if we’re not careful those differences could also become an area of contention.
Your first two questions can simply be answered by the statement I was young and growing up I was a mama’s boy who had literally everything done for him. Never learned to cook as a child, never cleaned a room in the house (meaning no dusting, vacuuming, mopping, etc.). My mom did all of that, and us children were expected to be out of the way back then. Brought this crap baggage into my marriage, and not “knowing” any better assumed that was how things should be, but thankfully my DW, realized that I was not too difficult of a horse, and that she could communicate with me, and we could actually have a growing partnership of a relationship.