I'm a teenage mum- ask me anything

[youngmum00]

I'm a teenage mother ask me anything (within reason!)

Also how do you keep your own mind?
What I mean is I was 33 when I had my first child and even at that elderly age I was SO influenced and easily guilt tripped into doing things for and with my baby by other people.
Not at all with my second but I imagine that you even more so will get pushed and influenced by (well meaning) people about child rearing.

How did your friends react, and are you still in touch with them? I ask because at 16 I'd have struggled with the concept of a friend with a baby. I had no idea how hard having a baby was until I got pregnant in my late twenties, and would have been a v selfish and judgmental friend!

@crosser62 I barely manage! I'm on benefits (which is less if you're 18) and I buy all baby things ad eBay bundles of at charity shops or on Facebook groups or get given things by other mums I know. I also rent a flat which I get housing benefit on (which covers most of the rent) but things are really tight and sometimes the bills bounce which is shit because I'll have a bad credit rating before I even turn 18. I buy everything in charity shops too. It's hard but there are people a lot worse off than me. I'm very lucky compared to most people in the world and I do know that although it's hard to remember sometimes.

I keep my own mind by trying not to take people's shit but it's a lifelong learning project but every time I do take people's shit I just end up worse off some how (physically, mentally, emotionally or literally). I've got nothing and no one to lose though to be honest so I just try and stick up for myself but it's hard and I'm tested and I get it wrong all the time but every time it I do get pushed over and eventually stand up for myself I feel a little bit stronger.

Saffy- I only really had one close friend/person I bothered to tell and they were supportive of my decision but always moving around so I didn't see much of them and the only other person around my age where I was at the time was really upset with me because they didn't understand why you would want to bring a child into this world. I was pretty isolated my whole pregnancy but that's a long story and I've had a bit of a strange life. The other people around me who were kind of like friends/people I looked up to and spent time with were older and a lot already parents and were very supportive of me which was lovely. (This situation might sound weird but in context it makes sense but I don't want to put even more details on here!) anyone reading this will know it's me though luckily don't think I know anyone that uses Mumsnet but who knows. Nothing incriminating eh

Yea @needsahouseboy it's so hard and pretty mind numbing a lot of the time. I'm just looking foreword to when they get a bit older and enjoy going to the park instead of being scared by everything lol. I just end up stuck indoors for days sometimes.

And @thereallifesaffy yes I am still in touch with that person they're still my favey person.

And it makes me happy to see them doing all the things I wanted to do and traveling and working and having fun although I do feel sad I'm not doing it with them sometimes. But in a funny way I feel quite proud of them for doing all those things and being so free.

Find a decent baby group. They weren’t really my thing but I found one that was okay.

My DS comes everywhere with me festivals, camping and we’ve driven through France to Germany. Don’t let having a child stop you from achieving what you want to do.
Get your exams, go to college/uni you can do it and byvthat time your child will be old to go travelling with you.

Have dreams because having a young kid is so bloody boring at times and so monotonous. So much better once they get to about 8 😁😁😁

Old enough that should say

. I just end up stuck indoors for days sometimes

That sound awful. I'd have gone crazy if I had done that. I guess everyone is different but I made sure I went out everyday come what may.

I'm shocked there are no baby groups at all in your area. What about church groups? I'm an atheist but was welcomed at a church mums group.