I let my hair go grey at 38, AMA

[starsandstuff]

I stopped dying my hair at 38, I'm now 42 and it's been fully grown out for a couple of years and I love it! I sometimes see some people saying they might like to but they're unsure so AMA.

Is it fully grey or a mixture of grey and your original colour?

Do you think it makes you look older?

(Also, we'll done for defying convention like that!)

I am 38 and doing the same.... I look awful at the moment!!! How long did it take for you to have great hair again??? Help!!!

There are streaks still of my natural colour - I was naturally quite dark - streaks of pure white at the front which I love, and underneath is really white. So a mixture!

Most people were really negative at the beginning and told me how much older I'd look, but now they say it doesn't make me look any older. But sometimes it can depending on what I've done with it or what I'm wearing or my makeup, but I quite like that - it makes me feel like I have a bit more authority!

What colour is your natural hair? I always think (with zero evidence whatsoever) that this is easier for those with blonde/light coloured hair.

When I was about 5 months in it was a horror show and I really wasn't sure about what I was doing, but then it passed a point and I kind of fell in love with it. My hair was really long to start. About maybe 7 months in I cut a good bit off it, then after I think just over a year I cut most of the rest of the colour off which left it just above shoulder length. That was the shortest it's been in my adult life, so then I started growing it again (and people told me not to in case I looked like a witch 🙄). Now it's back to the length it was before. Stick with it!!

When I was born I had a full head of jet black hair - my mum had to cut it at 6 weeks old cos it was growing over my eyes! As I got older it lightened a bit, but no my natural colour is dark brown. I still have a streak of black right at the front. So my roots were very noticeable!

Why? I have seen a few people do this and I’ve never understood the appeal.

Because my hair was dark I had to dye it all the bloody time. My roots showed up again after about a week. Whenever I had anything coming up I had to plan when to dye it - close enough that the roots wouldn't have started, not so close that I still had dye-marks on my face or the flat look you can get when it's just done. It was so much time and effort and mental energy and money and I just thought - why? I was curious what it would look like, and grey hair was having a real moment with young girls going and getting it dyed grey I thought time to see what it looks like for free.

Fair enough.

I have dark hair with greys and I dye mine. I get mine done every 4 weeks ish, it can be a pain though!

I'd never tell anyone not to dye it - everyone should do exactly what they'd like with their own hair. It's such a personal thing. For me it just stopped being worth the hassle and I honestly love never having to think about my roots ever. It's funny how negative people are about stopping dying it though (I don't mean you) but irl people said really horrible things. I'd never say "That colour looks shit on you" but I walked into work one day and my female boss said "That looks awful, get it dyed!" I just rolled my eyes...

Yeah that is really rude. I think grey can look striking with certain haircuts, but even if I thought it looked funny I wouldn’t say it!

I get my legs waxed instead of shaving and I love never thinking “are my legs shaved?” so I do get the advantage of never having to think about it lol!

Do you have a partner? If so what do they think of it? My friend attempted this but had to abandon it after her husband complained she looked old 🙄

My partner was really supportive. His attitude was it's my hair, my business. He's older than me and he has grey hair too, and he really had his eyes opened up to the difference in when he went grey and I did, as in no one told him how he was letting himself go or he was too young or whatever... He thinks it's beautiful, sometimes he'll just randomly say how nice it is when it catches the light or something. Mind you he did have to put up with months of me standing in front of the mirror in the beginning wailing "why won't it groooooow??" But he was great.

I would like to see a picture if possible? For inspiration...

I'm 37 and doing the same, am over half way so hopefully all done by Christmas! I'm loving the freedom from dying it, and the white front.

These are a couple of months apart, the most recent only the other week (it proper needs brushed in that one!) The colour looks lighter or darker depending on the light which I quite like - it's nice that it changes and it's not just a flat colour which I sometimes felt it was when I dyed it dark. Although it's been every colour over the years.

Your hair is beautiful... and matches your wall and lighting too, as an extra perk!

That looks far nicer that what I had imagined, it’s striking! You have great hair!

Thank you My whole house is painted grey coincidentally (or not)

I'm doing the same. I'm 39. Mine is naturally dark brown with some reddish through it.

Once you started going grey, did it feel like it was taking ages? I have a lot of white, but spread through mostly underneath and at my temples. It's sort of "diluting" my natural colour at the moment rather than blocking it out.

Your hair is what I hope my hair will eventually look like!

Oh another question - is your hair in better or worse condition now it is white, do you use any treatments on it?

Excited to hear your story. I am 38 and decided to stop colouring my hair 2 weeks ago. I now have 8 weeks regrowth. I had naturally dark brown hair, but now very grey. Fortunately my hairstyle is short, so I hoping it will grow out fast.

What did you do to motivate yourself to keep going?

There was a stage a few months in where it felt like it was taking forever. I was like, how come it grew so damn quickly between hairdresser appointments! But once it was over it felt like it happened really fast - like anything in life really.

It is in so much better condition now. Everyone says how coarse grey hair is, but it really isn't. It's really soft, and even though it's long again I have no split ends. Anytime I go to get it blow dried the hairdressers say what good condition it's in. It was always quite frizzy before and dry at the ends which I just assumed was my natural texture. It never occurred to me it was the dye but now I think it was. I use products for grey hair - White Hot Hair when I'm feeling flush, and Touch of Silver from Home Bargains when I'm not (which is more often lol)

I joined a FB group called Gray and Proud - it's a US based one hence the spelling - which was great (other grey hair support groups are available...) It was so lovely and supportive. Any bad hair days I would post a pic saying WHAT AM I DOING and women come in to encourage you and tell you not to give up, and there are posts from other women who have fully transitioned which are really inspiring. It definitely got me through the worst stages. It was lovely to see how many variations of colour and cut there are so it kept me motivated to see how mine would turn out. It's also a good place for a rant when someone says something negative, or to share when you get a random compliment from a stranger which is a lovely thing I totally wasn't prepared for. All of you growing it out now, you'll definitely see what I mean when you get through it

Thanks @starsandstuff I'm going to stick it out and I'll look at that FB group too.

Your hair looks fab! Very inspiring. I think about doing this all the time for the same reasons you mentioned. Dying it all the time is no fun and the grey roots appear after a week. But I just had my first baby (I'm 42) and I don't want everyone to think I'm her Granny! But they probably think they anyway because i never have time to do my roots.
Did you change anything about your style or make up when your hair became mostly grey?