Teacher upset with my child questioning about trans child

I think it’s the same friend we just don’t know who it is.

I don’t really want to take WhatsApp away as she then can’t communicate with friends at all outside of school

She didn’t leave the classroom, she has never done that. she got in trouble for repeatedly asking to go to the loo when she felt her period leak. It was her first period so she was very anxious. I believe that is being reviewed as she should have been allowed to go.

other things she has done wrong is truanting - she missed 2 lessons due to being in medical.

so she really has made a name for herself.

…

Can this be classed as the equivalent of homophobia or racism ? Is it discriminatory of her / me?

…
im not going to force her to accept or use the pronouns, she needs to trust me and she spends enough of her life confused about adhering to social norms as it is.

Men still aren't women though.

Bless her. The start to Year 7 sounds a challenge.

I'd certainly ask for a meeting with her Head of Year? Get them to explain how she got the detentions and why they think it's proportionate? The school are legally obligated to make "reasonable adjustments" for her SEN yet it seems
the school are taking it on themselves to discipline children for accurately sexing this male teacher using tale telling from other children as their source .
As I said, I can't see anywhere in all the guidance where this is specifically addressed other than the general expectation about treating others with respect.

I agree that reality exists independently of us. My point is that we can only perceive and understand it through our minds. We don’t create reality by looking at it, but we inevitably interpret what we see.

Gender is how our minds perceive and make sense of sex. That doesn’t mean gender creates sex. It means that when we perceive and give meaning to sex, we’re already engaging in the process of creating gender.

It means that when we perceive and give meaning to sex, we’re already engaging in the process of creating gender.
What in the name of all holy does that actually mean??

What is gender, in your view?

Socially transitioned- told he was actually a girl trapped in a boy's body, that some people had different brains and that he had a 'pink' brain, dressed in girl's clothing and female pronouns used.

Gender is the knowledge, recognition and meaning that we give to sexual differences

Or to put it another way- gender is how the brain processes sex

I see you're now creating your own meanings for words.

This makes communication with you very difficult, because your personal made up definitions of words are not the same as the dictionary definitions that the rest of us are using.

It's as though you're using your own personal language, using English words, but attaching different meanings to them. So this is why you don't understand what we're saying and your posts make no sense to anyone else.

Well, that’s a load of hooey 🤔

I’m not making up my own definitions of words. I’m explaining what gender is and how it relates to sex — a relationship that is fundamentally misunderstood in this discussion.

this misunderstanding is at the heart of why many people struggle to make sense of trans experiences.

Can you give any external references to gender being "knowledge, recognition and meaning that we give to sexual differences" and/or "how the brain processes sex"?

If you didn't make it up, where did you get that definition from?

There are any number of academic books, articles, scientific textbooks and authoritative reference works discussing gender and its relationship to sex. You could start with these:

1. Stanford Encyclopedia of Philosophy. Mikkola, M. Feminist Perspectives on Sex and Gender. Stanford University.

1. American Psychological Association (2018). Guidelines for Psychological Practice with Girls and Women.

1. National Academies of Sciences, Engineering, and Medicine (2022). Measuring Sex, Gender Identity, and Sexual Orientation.

1. American Psychological Association. APA Dictionary of Psychology: Gender.

1. World Health Organization. Gender and health

No. The " misunderstanding" arises because genderists expect us to pretend that "sparkle" can means "diamond" when it's not a diamond doing the sparkling.

This is what you believe. Because you are fundamentally strongly invested in something you call “gender” being the means by which we decide access to male or female spaces.

You acknowledge sex is real but you don’t want to use sex as the means by which access to single sex spaces is controlled.

Because you believe that males who think they are female/want to be female should be allowed to use female spaces.

That belief is the starting point that necessitates the garbled nonsense about “gender” being different to sex and yet somehow also interchangeable with sex.

It is at the root of your strong desire to believe that our perceptions can somehow create reality.

You have to believe this so you can blur sex vs “gender” sufficiently to make it seem reasonable to allow males access to female spaces for their personal validation.

Sex is real. It renders the female more vulnerable. That’s the entire point of single sex spaces.

I do not agree that act of viewing something changes its fundamental underlying reality.

I am so sorry for your child.
This should not happen.

@Lacksie

I asked you this earlier, but you ignored it.

Could you please explain to me what you think I have in common with a so called ‘transwoman’ that would make that categorisation more important than what I have in common with members of my own sex?

Because I cannot think of a single thing

A boy who was friends with my son in the school nursery had 'become a girl' by yr 1. It happens.

Which part are you finding to be garbled nonsense?

Do you acknowledge these two things , or are you disputing them? If the latter , can you explain how?

• reality exists independently but we can only perceive and understand it through our minds.
• We don’t create reality by looking at it, but we inevitably interpret what we see.

Likely creating lifetimes of mental and physical problems; and confusion in other children’s minds. It is child abuse.

World Health Organization. Gender and health

Gender refers to the characteristics of women, men, girls and boys that are socially constructed. This includes norms, behaviours and roles associated with being a woman, man, girl or boy

Do you agree with this definition?

Yes, absolutely. That’s a more applied way of expressing the same idea. The WHO describes some of the forms that gender takes in society — the characteristics, norms, behaviours and roles associated with sex. I’m explaining the underlying process through which these meanings arise: how we perceive, understand and give meaning to sex and sexual differences.

In other words, they’re different ways of describing the same phenomenon. One focuses on how gender manifests in society, the other on what gender fundamentally is and how it arises

We interpret what we see.
This does not alter the underlying reality.

So please explain why some male people should be allowed into spaces and services legally reserved for female people by use of single sex exemptions.

Are you saying it is because these males perceive themselves as female?

Are you saying that, if every observer present at the time thinks this male person is female, then they have become female?

Are you saying that if only some of the observers think this male person is female then they have become female?

Are you saying that if some/all the observers think this male person is female, he hasn’t become female, but it is nevertheless OK for him to use female spaces?

Are you saying that a male person who thinks they pass well as female should be allowed to use female spaces, regardless of the feelings of the female people present at the time?

Or what?

Because I do not see what anyone’s perceptions of another person’s appearance have anything to do with it.

Sex is a fact, not in the eye of the beholder.

How this is not child abuse?...

What if I don't think it's valid to give any psychological meaning to the sex categories? If I don't want gender taking up any space in my head except to remind myself (when school mums say "oh that's such a boy thing" or women say "it just made sense for me to give up work, his job is more important") that it's a load of rubbish?

"How the brain processes sex" by the way is completely made up. The brain works out what sex someone is. Some people then go on and think "so that woman will be nurturing". That's called stereotyping. Aka oppression. It's not a characteristic that should be encouraged and it's also not different to stereotyping. You can't make it nice and fluffy by calling it gender. It's just prejudice. We don't like prejudice. We do use it as humans to categorise people but we need to be aware of that and resist it where it's harming people, not decide "because people categorise other people into skirt wearers and non skirt wearers this is a natural category we can use to divide people up". We also categorise people into drivers and non drivers but that doesn't mean this is a natural category.