I just outed myself as a “Terf”

I just wish I hadn't said anything but it was relevant and I couldn't just let it pass

I suspect you would have regretted it more, if you hadn't spoken up.

If the two of you discuss it further, you could mention that you are aware that many trans people reject the 'born in the wrong body narrative', and that many gay people consider it homophobic in the extreme (because the people usually identified as being 'in the wrong body' typically have characteristics associated with being gay e.g. "effeminate" men). Surely she is not suggesting your organisation uses homophobic terminology?

Or, taking another approach, suggest that you survey service users to ask if they want to retain the words 'woman' and 'female' in discussing maternity services.

Love those sweet women in the video (doulas)

• non existent transman who is so dysphoric they have had a full mastectomy Sorry I'm not calling transmen who have had a full mastectomy non existent. But ones who do this and want to breastfeed will be.

The whole rewriting of
breast feeding = chest feeding doesn't even stand up to transgender ideology scrutiny.
Seeing as newsflash MEN have breasts too!

Men can get breast cancer.
Men can lactate from their breast.

If the idea that this language is supposed to accommodate the non existent transman who is so dysphoric they have had a full mastectomy so no longer have breasts well newsflash
They will NOT BE breastfeeding because they no longer have their breasts from which to feed so do not need to be included in discussions about breastfeeding.

If we are supposed to buy into the Female Penis, it is not a stretch to buy into the male babyfeeding breasts.

Basically all of my friends are very lefty, right-on, liberal blah blah. Most of them repeat the 'transwomen are real women' line in public, but in private, they'll admit that they don't actually believe it.

I'm the only person I know who will publicly 'admit' to not believing in it. (Admit makes it sound like it's a bad thing, which I don't think it is.)

Quite sick of this whole nonsense, especially considering it affects such a small percentage of the population.

Maternity services may also end up in the situation where a woman who requests a female HCP does not actually have a guarantee of getting a biological female, but instead a TIM. I wonder if your chair would be more likely to see the issue with this? (Eg could send the cervical smear news item)?

I’ve now sent her a link to some resources but basically she now thinks I’m an evil bigot. Arrrgh! This is beyond awkward

It's because she has no idea what's going on. It would sound quite neurotic to the blissfully unaware to bring up trans people as something to be bothered about, who in her mind are poor vulnerable dysphoric people just trying to get by in life.
She likely totally clueless that it's a whole movement that includes Riley, Danielle, and a bunch of MRAs.
It's why on first encounter what you said... sadly... actually does seem bigoted and irrational. She needs to peak.
Don't be ashamed, you have a genuine cause for concern!

You could point out that there is a growing trend to centre trans people in all female centred care services.

While trans people are a tiny minority many female focused organisations are being pressured to deny the existence of their own biology and being told that naming female biology is transphobic.

Eg chest feeding, pregnant people.

Just point it out. Say you are raising the issue.

This video exposes what is going on in American Doula training. One person was kicked out for challenging female erasure even though she didn't break any official rules.

If a male identifying woman needed our services I would of course be happy to call him by whatever name he wants and use the pronouns he wanted. But I’m not re writing our leaflets which are valid for (currently) 100% of our service users. I’m not erasing women.

I work in maternity and we had a hand maiden approach us recently about our TERF leaflets which dared mention the word “woman”. She was firmly told to go away.

Midwives are normally quite good st the feminism/sticking up for women thing and I’m surprised you’ve encountered some who aren’t. Hope you manage to educate them.

Maternity services do need to be sensitive to the needs and mental health of transmen - ie femininity-rejecting women who are of course going to get pregnant from time to time (sometimes by accident and sometimes intended - many transmen may identify as gay and be in a relationship with a man or if they identify as heterosexual they may be in a relationship with a transwoman with a fully functional sperm-producing ladydick so plenty of opportunities). If they don't want to be called mum or have their biological organs described in terms they find distressing then it is right and proper for the professionals supporting those individuals to adapt the language used in their presence.

It is not at all appropriate or right - but would be erasing and misogynistic - for that adapted language to be used for every woman who is having a baby.

I totally agree. It's breast feeding, women who get pregnant. But if you're a TIF then it should be written in your file, together with the pronouns you want used.

This could be managed similarly to how pregnant women are asked about rape/sexual assault. If they answer yes it's put on their file, because it's important for those treating them to know.

How many pregnant transmen are there?
Giving birth was very much something I did as a woman. If hate all language to become "inclusive' around childbirth as for me it was important to recognise it was something women do and support as a woman from other women who had done it etc.

And breastfeeding not chestfeeding . Fine to change terminology for the fee that need it but to bulldoze over the rest of us seems so very wrong.

It feels like erasing our womanhood completely.

This doc was interesting, on YouTube (an example of trans identifying women having a baby together, while identifying as ‘dads’). Very difficult to hold those two self images together I’d have thought. The doc makes it clear that a lot of pressure is on NHS maternity services to adopt the trans agenda and language, which I would say would be a massive disservice to most women. IMO it’s OK to be respectful of someone’s chosen pronouns if they are also respectful of everyone else’s labels (eg I will never accept cis) but that’s as far as a women-focused maternity service should go as far as adapting. So eg making the default descriptors of a maternity service to be “person’ or talking about ‘chest feeding’ etc unless to a TIF who you know prefers this speech, would be wrong, in denying of other (most) women’s reality.

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/womens_rights/3139511-Sex-map-of-Britain-transgender-dads

What would make a woman who rejects her female body and thinks it was an accident of birth that she wasn't born male decide to get pregnant in the first place?

Totally anecdotal.

I'm close to a Mother who is gay.
Basically throughout her teenage years she was bullied. Horribly.
Denied being gay and instead identified as Male.

Eventually fell in love with a woman who adores her, accepted her.
With age, maturity and the security of a civil partnership they decided to have a baby.
She got pregnant was (sort of) still 'going as' a man.
During pregnancy embraced her womanly self. Had a daughter. Became a woman.

I don't get any of it tbh but she's now a happy, fulfilled woman.
Married to another woman, raising a daughter.
Everyone pretends she was never a 'boy'.

It all confuses the shit out of me.

It is impossible to be born in the wrong body. That is a science fiction story and naught to do with material reality.
Has anyone noticed that trans identified males "transwomen" make the news for sports, business, and politics, while trans identified females "transmen" make the news for having babies? That is misogyny!

What would make a woman who rejects her female body and thinks it was an accident of birth that she wasn't born male decide to get pregnant in the first place?

Good question

The Equality Act protects sex as a protected class and term.

SEX IS NOT GENDER.
SEX IS NOT GENDER.
SEX IS NOT GENDER.
SEX IS NOT GENDER.

In revisionist biology shall we start talking about people born with the wrong hands for their bodies? Or the wrong brains for their bodies?

Just musing... What would make a woman who rejects her female body and thinks it was an accident of birth that she wasn't born male decide to get pregnant in the first place?

Wrong body my arse.

'The issue is that I cannot be on board with pretending biological men are women and vice versa'

And it's utterly ridiculous that you're in a position where you feel that you're being expected to go along with this nonsense. It's biological FACT, not just a random opinion. Being 'born in the wrong body' may be a genuine feeling for some people, but it has no basis in reality

Changing the language they use for everyone s not inclusive. It excludes the majority of users who are comfortable being pregnant women.

Under what circumstances would a biological man rock up to a maternity unit? If you're talking about a transman, if they have a uterus (and a full one at that...) they're treated as the woman they are, surely?
Trans has no place in a discussion on Maternity Services, the bloody world's gone mad.