Any advice please?

I know what I'm about to say isn't very feminist (and goes against what I believe) but would they take the message on board if it was a male teacher?

Unfortunately I completely see your point in this. I've encountered a fair few "anti-feminist" boys (who attended an all boys school) with whom I eventually realised it was pointless engaging. Then, a boy perceived as being incredibly "cool" at this school (rugby team captain etc) started going out with a friend of mine, engaged with feminism and decided he was a feminist (and seems to genuinely care). Suddenly, a couple of those boys with whom I've since engaged have declared they "see where feminism is coming from" and that school even has a joint feminist society with their sister girls' school now. So, much as it's frustrating and shows the need for feminism in itself that sometimes boys/men will only think about things when they hear about it from other boys/men, it can have positive results.

Also, OP, I very much feel for you. I see you've already discussed ways in which outdated views harm men, such as terms like "man up" and boys/men being discouraged from expressing feelings and showing sensitivity etc. Although it may not be top of their list of considerations at the moment, there are also issues such as how fathers are discouraged from being primary caregivers for their children, mothers assumed to take on that role, lack of equal parental leave meaning fathers find it difficult to stay at home/take on most of the parental responsibility if they want to, pressured into feeling they have to be the "breadwinner" when they want to be bonding with their child etc which still happens. Though of course I'm no expert! Also perhaps how girls and boys are pushed towards thinking certain subjects aren't for them which inhibits all children.

I don't know if this is suitable for the age you're teaching (just being cautious) but it's a domestic violence advert addressing respect for women from Australia that has had some excellent press recently.

I think it's quite powerful and shows the link between seemingly innocuous statements we hear a lot and damaging attitudes towards women.

Could be a debate topic?

Yeah I know mousse
Just lecturing the OP who's clearly an amazing teacher on how their own prejudices aren't helping momentarily got my back up.

Quentin it depends how the lesson is done. If presented in a 'we are worried about boys' way they may well engage. Asking why boys do worse than girls and making them think might work. Pull out the specific behaviours that reduce the achievement of boys and analyse them. See if they can relate these behaviours to themselves.

Yeah great spicey. Talking to a bunch of boys who are already anti woman about why "boys do worse than girls at school" will definitely be useful

I think you need to try to avoid teaching equality in the manner that a vicar would teach RE. Everyone needs to challenge their prejudices. That very much applies to your pupils, but to you as well i.e. trying to understand their views will help the discussion and learning.

The other thing is that everyone finds it hard to worry about things they have little experience of e.g. poverty in Africa. Therefore, it may be harder for kids to appreciate things like different salaries.

You could talk about things like why do boys do worse than girls at school? Is it sexism that means women live longer than men? Anything to get them thinking!

jellies c4 did a program a few years back called "sex in class" and it was really good. Don't know if you have already watched it but if not it might interest you. She was very clever at getting boys and girls to be open about their expectations of sex and relationships. And identifying where these were unrealistic (for the boys who'd been learning from porn (
www.channel4.com/programmes/sex-in-class

Oh and when you have planned and resourced these lessons could you make them available to the rest of us

Men often present their arguments as 'logical' as opposed to the 'over emotional' stance of feminists.

As pp have suggested. A fact based lesson. They have to match percentages to facts - women killed by DV - women who have suffered FGM.

Or to support their arguments they have to research and prove their points with well substantiated facts. Not the wild opinions of a YouTube blogger. Link it science and history where you need to evidence your opinions.

Use cold, hard logic. Point out their over emotional investment in their 'feelinz' - obviously don't humiliate, but you can make them uncomfortable.

Hi, the only way you're going to win these boys over is with plain old logic - you're going to have to show them that you make more sense than one of these anti feminist YouTubers - it's that simple.

The thing is it's not that simple. It's hard to argue logically against ideas that are so endemic.

Like blaming victims for what they wear. To say "if you don't want to attract male attention then don't wear revealing clothing" sounds logical and simple but it ignores the complex reality of girls' lives: the pressure of fashion and conformity, the conflict of wanting to look attractive to the opposite sex (entirely natural) whilst only wanting that attention from boys you like. The ideas we are taught about the male ego and its fragility etc etc.

And what seems "logical" and objective is often just the subjective opinion of the mainstream.

Ok, no problem.

Good luck.

A lot of universities especially those in the Russell group are focusing on this. Perhaps contact them for advice

Good luck Jellies, I hope you find a way through. It's very distressing to think waves of young men are entering adulthood with ingrained disrespect for fifty percent of the population.

So depressing. Good on you for tackling this.

I'm glad your SLT member was supportive.

A Call to Men come into schools to do work with boys aged 11+ but that would be an extra demand on the school budget. And it's shit that we have to get men in to talk to boys because they won't listen to women

You could also direct them to this thread:

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/2884837-AIBU-to-say-that-the-vast-majority-of-women-are-sexually-assaulted-at-some-point-poss-trigger

OP I have no advice but I feel for you. The kind of videos DS and his classmates watch are littered with misconceptions about feminism: that it is against men, that it is about treating women like special snowflakes, that the pay gap isn't important because women choose their occupations, etc.

Even the girls are anti-feminists, presumably because it's not cool and because they've been fed the same misinformation.

Feminist is a standard insult. It made me laugh because one of DS's female classmates called Katie Hopkins a feminist just as a way of insulting her.

I don't think there is much you can do because you are just one person and anti-feminists like MY may be jerks but are very charming and good at arguing. Unfortunately the better/more logical/morally fair argument doesn't always win the day. Particularly in the case of feminism because it's been so wilfully mispainted.

Your best bet is to take feminism out of it and talk about consent and the legal requirements of the land. A great case to study would be the Brock Turner case for three reasons: the consent issue is a good teaching point, the men who rescued her were visibly shaken by it, and her impact statement was amazing and went viral.

Good luck

Have you come across the Bristol Ideal?
They may have some resources that are useful to you, but more importantly they emphasise that it has to be a whole school approach.

Your lesson shouldn't be the only place where their behaviour and views are challenged. Other female teachers may also be having a hard time.

Girls at your school probably deal with sexual harassment and assault on a day to day basis. The Report to the Women & Equalities Committee last September reported the extent of this, and your school has a duty to address this. But again it needs to be the whole school challenging behaviour and attitudes not just one teacher in one period a week.

Hi, the only way you're going to win these boys over is with plain old logic - you're going to have to show them that you make more sense than one of these anti feminist YouTubers - it's that simple.

I happen to be be one of those anti feminist YouTubers ... www.youtube.com/c/BearingBear ... you're more than welcome to join me for a live discussion - I'm perfectly polite to my guests and I am willing to change my views.

Best case scenario, you change my mind on a few things and look like a hero to your students ... worst case scenario, we don't agree on anything and we've lost nothing but an hour of our time ... you'd probably still gain some respect for having the backbone to have the conversation in the first place.

Email me if you're interested .. [email protected]

Cheers.