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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

14 year old dd wants to do something

37 replies

marvelousdcomics · 01/11/2016 18:14

And she's not sure what.

I already have a thread detailing 5 FTM students at her school and their homophobic bullying towards her, and her gender-critical feminist views. I've shown her the Spartacus threads and some other stuff, and she completely agrees with everything and is extremely passionate about the topic. She really wants to do something, anything, to make people see the 'trans trend' for what it is. It's taking over her life and damaging her friendships.

We have agreed to send the letter template from another thread to our local MP, so that could be an option, but would anyone listen to a 14 year old? She really really wants to help the cause.

Also, on my other thread, some people said she shouldn't have said 'i wouldn't date a transwoman purely because I'm a lesbian and transwomen are biologically male' for which she got insulted for by her apparent friends, because it could be viewed as transphobic and may get her excluded from LGBTQ+ groups. I do understand this and dd already said she doesn't fit in with these groups, but isn't dd right to challenge what so many people are afraid to??

Any opinions welcome, thank you.

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marvelousdcomics · 02/11/2016 14:19

Umm. So, after a park trip and McDonalds lunch, dd rushed to refresh the GCT website and they've mentioned mumsnet. I cant attach a picture, sorry, but they've mentioned the Spartacus thread.

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PoisonWitch · 02/11/2016 13:04

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marvelousdcomics · 02/11/2016 11:40

Oooo, there's another post on it now. Haven't read it though - dd is refreshing it every 10 minutes and watching Magdalen Burns on youtube Grin

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marvelousdcomics · 02/11/2016 10:42

I agree!

That would be a good idea, thank you Smile

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YetAnotherSpartacus · 02/11/2016 09:25

Looks promising! There is a 16 YO gender critical young woman posting here too - maybe you could pm her and she and your daughter could chat?

marvelousdcomics · 02/11/2016 09:22

gendercriticalteen.blogspot.co.uk/?m=1

Not sure if that linked. There's only 1 very recent post and dd said it has a catchy name Grin

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YetAnotherSpartacus · 02/11/2016 09:14

I'd love to see it! I've seen the young radical women one, but not anything specific to trans issues...

marvelousdcomics · 02/11/2016 09:08

Thank you Smile

We've found an amazing blog website, but I think dd wants to just follow this other blog we've found and perhaps create one soon. Am I allowed to link this other one I've found?? It seems that other young people have the same view as dd, which is great

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YetAnotherSpartacus · 02/11/2016 08:43

:) and happy to help... I'm not a blogger though so can't help you with the technology ...

marvelousdcomics · 02/11/2016 08:41

Just been looking around for a good blogging website. Whilst looking, I found a new blog by another teenager on exactly this topic!! How weird!? It's very new with 1 post, but dd thinks it's cool. I could try and link it if anyone wants it

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marvelousdcomics · 02/11/2016 08:19

Spartacus, I too think a blog would be great. She's really into the idea of it. The thing is, we don't have a computer - just phones. Do you know of any phone accessible blogging websites we could use? Thank you for your post, it has some great ideas Smile

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YetAnotherSpartacus · 02/11/2016 08:16

I reckon a blog is a great start. What I think is needed is a place on the net for young people (or even just young women) to find information about the kinds of struggles they go through that might lead them, in the current climate, to think they are trans. Currently, most of the information suggests that angst is the question and trans is the answer. However, there are many causes of dysmorphia, dysphoria and not wanting to be a woman (or a man) that don't necessarily indicate that someone is trans. Stories from young people about these struggles dont tend to gain much exposure. Maybe your daughter could create a blog and also collect these stories from young people (and young adults) to give questioning young people an alternative perspective to "I must be trans, quick, pass the drug therapy". This would not have to be in direct opposition to the trans sites, it could simply offer an alternative perspective and place for young people to go for information whilst sorting out their feelings. Initially, she could start with her own words and some links to other young people who have posted their stories (including de-transitioners). It strikes me that we have a site for professionals and for parents, but one led by young people for young people would be excellent. Just an idea ...

marvelousdcomics · 02/11/2016 07:59

singing, my other thread is in AIBU - I think its called 'dd and argument with trans friends'

Clona, no we aren't in London.

Thank you so much everyone, she will love all the ideas/comments

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Prawnofthepatriarchy · 02/11/2016 07:50

I remember being fired up by feminism at 14. It's an amazing age. Good for her! Star

LassWiTheDelicateAir · 02/11/2016 00:36

There's a thread in Activism about Reclaim the Night 2016.

Reclaim the Night 2016, when and where | Mumsnet Discussion
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/feminist_activism/2761533-Reclaim-the-Night-2016-when-and-where

Clonakilty · 01/11/2016 23:31

Are you in London? It sounds as though your DD wants to take action; My DD is very similarly minded. She and I are attending Reclaim The Night.

PoisonWitch · 01/11/2016 22:42

There is a radfem collective social weekend in February. I know people going to it. Perhaps you two could go together. You can find the details with a quick Google.

LRDtheFeministDragon · 01/11/2016 22:06

Good on your DD.

I don't think I have anything else to say, but I do think it isn't impossible to find people who do not think it is TERFy to state you're not attracted to male genitalia. I have a very good friend who identifies as non-binary, and who would agree with me strongly on this. We are both in our 30s and both of us work with students in their late teens/early 20s, and I think we are consciously responding to seeing a lot of anger and throwing around of insults in those groups.

So, it is worth knowing that within LGBT groups, and non-binary/trans groups, there are people who would perfectly well understand your DD's sexuality, and would respect it.

singingsixpence82 · 01/11/2016 21:54

Good on your daughter! We need young people saying these things. And so sorry for what she's been through with regard to the homophobic bullying. Where is your other thread incidentally?

venusinscorpio · 01/11/2016 21:00

I think she sounds awesome Flowers

marvelousdcomics · 01/11/2016 20:28

Thank you Felas Smile That's a good idea about finding/joining a group. She'd love it, I'll have a look around. Thank you.

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Felascloak · 01/11/2016 20:19

Aw bless her. She sounds amazing. Tell her never to lose that passion.
I am not a lesbian but have heard younger lesbians say that finding older lesbians and understanding more about lesbian culture (especially butch culture) has really helped them feel supported. Could she join a radfem group and maybe get some support and ideas from action as part of a group? It might be safer for her.

marvelousdcomics · 01/11/2016 19:45

Imina, I keep telling her to. I'm worried about her safety and wellbeing. However, shes unlike any teen I've ever met. Shes so passionate, so insistent. She wont quit with anything she puts her mind to. She says 'im not going to be silenced like everyone else. I have to stand up for everything I believe in otherwise id have to go along with it and be a hypocrite.' Sad I am terribly worried for her, I truly am

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IminaPickle · 01/11/2016 19:41

Honestly. For her safety and sanity, I'd advise her to keep her head down. Sad

marvelousdcomics · 01/11/2016 19:37

Flora, that's a good idea - thank you.

Thanks Venus Smile I think she will

Thank you steppin. She loves researching new things so that would be good.

Thanks Vestal. I will be careful before making a blog or anything.

Does anyone know of any good blogging websites just for future reference?
Thank you everyone

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