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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Feminist Pub XVIII, in which the Bluestocking greets the first signs of spring with a glass of something soothing

994 replies

PuffinsAreFictitious · 16/03/2015 23:08

Just starting this one as the last is nearly full

OP posts:
StormyBrid · 22/03/2015 09:34

There's certainly revulsion towards beards in some areas. Possibly just age related though - when you're fifteen and you fancy seventeen year olds the big bushy beards are a bit thin on the ground. I recall my peers being revolted by beards at that sort of age. (Not me though - thanks to early exposure to Commander Riker I've been a beard fan for many a year.)

lagartaroja · 22/03/2015 08:33

Smile lagar I quite like that unforeseen shortening of my name.

I meant to add that over the years I've found discussions on here really thougt provoking (and eye opening in terms of some of the attitudes) and they've shaped my thinking no end. Cheers!

SoMuchForSubtlety · 22/03/2015 08:05

kickass I was awake stupidly early too, but more because I went to bed early in a huff! Hope the mental treadmill stops.

SoMuchForSubtlety · 22/03/2015 08:03

I don't think men shaving their face is quite the same. There isn't the same level of revulsion in discussions about men with beards I think.

YonicScrewdriver · 22/03/2015 07:26

Welcome lagar!

kickassangel · 22/03/2015 07:07

Morning everyone, new and old/familiar

It is 3 am and I am wide awake worrying about problems which dint even exist. Gah!Hmm

drspouse · 22/03/2015 06:40

Morning!
I gave in and started shaving my legs in my 30s. Before that I bleached my leg hair, it was always quite blonde. Now I get them waxed. But DH shaves and always has and won't consider a beard even though I've asked. Is that in any way equivalent?
Refuse to do anything about hair higher than my knees and lower than my navel though. A rather forthright beautician once suggested I must "because you are a woman after all".

Just contributed to a thread about the oldest age to be a mother. Not a SINGLE person has mentioned the oldest age to be a father.

lagartaroja · 22/03/2015 06:17

Hello!

Could I join in too please? Long time lurker here as well.

So, body hair... I stopped shaving about 6 months ago and although I wasn't too enamoured with my legs, I loved my pits. Then, maternity leave finished and it started to get warmer. Without tights my legs itched each other when I walked and I kept getting electric shocks from escalators!

Anyway I shaved my legs. My pits followed soon afterwards when I went back to work. I'm vaguely annoyed with myself for giving in though.

EBearhug · 22/03/2015 01:46

In IT?

(I can't believe I'm the only one in the building with MN connections.)

SeraOfeliaFalfurrias · 21/03/2015 22:42

No, EBear, but DH works in Reading, as it happens.

EBearhug · 21/03/2015 22:36

Sounds like us (it's not in Reading is it?) I'd be going for office casual, too. I'm usually in trousers and a plain top - I rarely wear skirts after the day I had to to the datacentre unexpectedly. Crawling around on the floor and going under the floor space to trace cables is not as easy in a tightish skirt. I did wear a dress on Thursday when we had a high-up manager from the US over, though.

SeraOfeliaFalfurrias · 21/03/2015 22:26

They seemed to range from jeans and t-shirt to office smart. I'm going for office casual - slacks and top/blouse but no jacket. I want to stay fairly smart - dress for the job you want and all that. But being a slob around the house in a tracksuit sort of girl, even though I think I have it sussed, chances are I'll cock it up somehow! It's just weird having to have a work wardrobe again.

EBearhug · 21/03/2015 22:15

What were they wearing when you interviewed? Smart casual or suits? I would aim for slightly smarter than usual until I'd sussed it out.

SeraOfeliaFalfurrias · 21/03/2015 21:40

So on Monday I start my new job, and it's the first job in a very long time where I have to wear clothes that I actually own and choose myself. For the past 5 years I've worn scruffy, ugly and crap-fitting scrubs under a lab coat. Figuring out what on earth normal people wear at work is causing more panic than any other part of starting a new job!

MsDragons · 21/03/2015 20:46

Actually Ebear, you make a good point. I certainly can't tell whether people have shaved or not when I go swimming, due to not having my glasses on/goggles being steamed up. It's more the changing rooms/ getting to and from the pool that bothers me. People can see me then, and it's uncomfortable for me to show hairy armpits, more than it is for me to have (not very) hairy legs, or an untrimmed bikini line.

EBearhug · 21/03/2015 19:55

If you swim competitively, then full body shaving may be reasonable.

I reckon at the times I go, most people are swimming without their glasses and can't make out much more than there's another person in the pool.

(This isn't fully logical - after all, I am probably not the only one who has had their eyes lasered, and some will have naturally good eyesight, but even then, I doubt they're staring at me anyway. My swimming is neither so good nor so bad as to be noticeable.)

magimedi · 21/03/2015 19:35

MsDragons - I also swim 3 x a week & have got quite fixated about it & my times & justify shaving as it will reduce the drag.

Grin
FibonacciSeries · 21/03/2015 19:01

I have pale skin and dark, abundant body hair. So I wax. I figure as long as I don't judge women who don't (and I really do not judge), I'm not doing too badly on the feminist stakes.

MsDragons · 21/03/2015 18:16

I don't shave very much either. But like Ebear I'm not particularly hairy anyway and I suspect I would bow to social conditioning and shave my legs if I was going to have them on display. I do shave my armpits every couple of weeks because I swim quite often and don't like the looks I get when I leave it too long.

EBearhug · 21/03/2015 16:04

I get my eyebrows shaped once in a while (probably about 3 times a year.) I shave my underarms once in a while, but not all the time, as the skin gets sore. Even more rarely, I wax my legs. I haven't done them for ages, but I am not particularly hairy anyway, and I don't reckon most people would notice without being right up close.

I do sometimes wonder how militant I might feel about depilation if I were hairier. I mean, it's quite easy not to shave if you don't have very noticeable hair in the first place. Mind you, I also don't dye my hair, and the white hairs are becoming more noticeable, particularly in one streak. So I suspect I would still not be very active when it comes to depilation.

BeyondDoesBootcamp · 21/03/2015 15:36

I did try not shaving under my arms. The hair was pitiful and dh didnt even notice, all it did was annoy me. So i've given up amd started again

SeraOfeliaFalfurrias · 21/03/2015 15:30

I keep trying to embrace my hair and stop epilating. But societal conditioning always gets me in the end. Sad

magimedi · 21/03/2015 15:29

Blush Not so sure about the lovely & the wisdom is possibly only that of years!

SeraOfeliaFalfurrias · 21/03/2015 15:24

Hello magi! I'm very pleased to see you here.

Magi is indeed fabulous, folks. I have met her in RL at a meetup. She is wise and lovely.

magimedi · 21/03/2015 15:20

I shave more now I am post menopause than I did before! My skin is so dry & I find shaving legs helps exfoliate them & moisturiser soaks in better.

I wish I could accept my facial hair & not wax & tweeze - but I just can't.

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