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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Article about strip clubs in the Guardian

891 replies

SaskiaRembrandtVampireHunter · 19/10/2012 10:05

Never read such a load of twaddle in my life:

www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/2012/oct/19/strip-clubs-new-normal

"Is it good or bad that for young men, going to a strip club is the new normal? I'd venture that it's a good thing. It's a place where they can step outside the anxiety-fraught dating scene and talk to a woman who, as long as he keeps tipping, will give him the time of day. It's a world where women parade around nude or nearly so in which doing so doesn't get anybody arrested or elicit gasps. It's a private room wherein a lap dance is on the table and a man expressing his sexuality isn't going to be met with a sexual harassment lawsuit."

Oh yes, because thanks to the feminazis it's now illegal to talk to women Hmm

OP posts:
FastLoris · 31/10/2012 09:18

That's interesting sausage your theory may well be correct. I certainly think the idea that lapdancing automatically means a one-sided dynamic in which the dancer "only exists" to "service the man" is over-simplistic. I mean, she's providing a service, like anyone being paid for a service. But there is a clear behavioural brick wall which he cannot cross, which massively circumscribes what he can do about any sense of power or control he may feel anyway. In the process, he is spending large amounts of his money to make her richer, and not really getting anything for it except a bit of visual titillation. Who's power and who's control is that?

I'd say there's just as strong an argument that lapdancers are "objectifying" their customers - focusing on them as a source of money, doing everything they can to maximise their short-term profit out of them and not giving a toss about them as people - as there is the other way around. But then that's how capitalism, and to a large extent society in general, works anyway. Everyone objectifies everyone else within certain agreed limits.

The problem is that people get attached to singlular, one-size-fits-all models of thought and don't stop to check whether that's really what's happening, or whether it happens differently for different individuals. Human thought is infinitely more complicated and hard to pin down than that. That's why whatever we may feel personally about various activities, it's only justifiable to ban those which cause direct, demonstrable harm. Once you start making presumptions about how an activity engenders thoughts that you believe will cause harm somewhere else, hell you could make a case like that about practically anything.

grimbletart · 31/10/2012 09:04

It is why I am so anti religion as he was very religious and a woman's place is at the kitchen sink.

So your experience of one man led you to generalise and form a very strong opinion (irrespective of the facts about religion)?

Could it not be that the experiences of some of these posters of many men also led them to generalise and form a very strong opinion (irrespective of the facts about lap dancing)?

As I said I would not let my personal antipathy form a basis for banning, but I have to wonder.. if crimes actually fall in when lap dancing clubs open, what does that say about the men who frequent them - absolutely nothing as correlation does not equal causation or the possibility that it is the 'herding' of unsavoury characters into one place that makes a particular area safer?

I have no answer to these - only questions.

Sausageeggbacon · 31/10/2012 08:30

I have a theory, might not be liked by everyone but

Abusive men seem to have 1 need more than any other the need to control. The physical and emotional abuse is designed to make the target need him and do what he wants. I can't see LDCs offering abusive men that, their control would be too short term and the dancer never needs them for more than their wallet. An abusive man I just can't see him sitting their unable to touch and knowing that security is only feet away. Realistically there is just too little there for him. Not saying he wouldn't go there with his mates but he would not be a regular customer. Personal opinion and my X wouldn't have gone but he would have worried about his soul being damned.

One other thing there was a comment earlier in the thread about a dancer only earn £7 for 3 minutes work. When you remember that is over an hour's work to most people it just goes to show how relative earning power is.

Sausageeggbacon · 31/10/2012 06:52

Somerset my xh was emotionally controlling which is not as bad but gives me some idea of going through life with an evil bugger as a partner. It is why I am so anti religion as he was very religious and a woman's place is at the kitchen sink. The point here is do LDCs make men violent or not. Warning the link here is pro striptease but having swapped a quick set of mails with the author would point out 3 things. One the data is drawn from a public tool run by the police so can't be biased. Two violent crimes include sex crimes so we don't know if it is fights or sexual assault being recorded. Three he claims he has been harsh collecting the data and over included if things were very close to the boundaries he set.

Having read his report this morning it is simple but the figures obviously backed his argument. As it is easily checked I did a couple that are local (ish) to me and got similar results (practical no violent crime).

Line Runner thank you for that re Portsmouth, seems opening your bar at the right time can be a very clever ploy. Of course if clubs turned men into wild beasts crime would have rushed back into the area but that is just my simplistic view.

SomersetONeil · 31/10/2012 05:42

DadDancer: One of the main lines of argument from the antis is that lap dancing clubs objectify women. But how do they actually know this to be true?

Well, if you're genuinely interested, take a look at this Mumsnet thread from a month or so ago...

Over 600 posts with practically every woman posting saying that she has been the victim of sexual abuse - ranging from mild to horrific.

Women as a gender experience this sort of assault and abuse almost on a daily basis in a way that most men will never be able to understand. And this happens as part and parcel of a culture which sexualises and objectifies women in a way it doesn't for men.

I challenge you to read the whole thread. I don't, however, expect you to understand. :) But, by all means, continue to argue for the right to pay women to strip for you.

LineRunner · 30/10/2012 23:13

I am still wondering if Wiggle has Planning Permission yet. Would that be an actual, empirical fact?

HappyHalloweenMotherFucker · 30/10/2012 22:47

Frans, I don't really care. I have no expectation of winning any "argument". But I will have my say.

Frans1980 · 30/10/2012 22:35

Insults won't help your argument HH.

TheDoctrineOfSnatch · 30/10/2012 22:31

No thank you DD, I was enquiring as to published studies.

HappyHalloweenMotherFucker · 30/10/2012 22:07

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by Mumsnet for breaking our Talk Guidelines. Replies may also be deleted.

DadDancer · 30/10/2012 22:02

Does anyone know of any studies regarding any effect on the behavioiur of people visiting LDCs with their partners/spouses?

I am not aware of any studies for this but as someone who has been to a club with my other half, i could be your first case study specimen? Smile We didn't have a private dance together, just drinks and watched the pole dancing. Although our friends did. I think it's more common than a lot of people think..... hmmmm but is this because they genuinely enjoy it or is it a compromise so they can keep an eye on their fella. This i don't know

FastLoris · 30/10/2012 22:01

Sabrina -

OK, I googled too and totally take your point about the Guardian journalist. Not a massive basis for objectivity, I admit.

On money: the Leeds study mentions £232 as an average (nationwide, I presume). If that's for a 4-8 hour shift it's actually very good and much better than most casual work that doesn't require professional qualifications. Now, ANY work of that nature is going to be variable in profitability. I'm self-employed and I know exactly what that's like, earning shedloads one week and nothing the next. But I still tot everything up at the end of each month and end of each year (for the taxman), take an average and use that as a basis for my outgoings.

There's no point in dwelling on the fact that there will be some bad nights, because that's already accounted for in the average. That's what an average means, after all. If a lapdancer averages £232 per night, and there are some nights when she gets nothing, that means by definition there will be other nights when she gets £464 - or however it balances out. If the nationwide average is £232 per night and there are some lapdancers out there only averaging £100 or less, that means there must also be some earning £300 or £400 +.

Likewise, there's no point dwelling on the commission they have to pay to the club, since this is already accounted for (I presume) in the figure of their average earnings.

Is self-employment by commission a stressful way to earn your living? Sure it is. But no more stressful for a lapdancer than for a sales rep, freelance writer or plenty of other jobs, I suppose. It's a choice each person has to make, whether to stay in such a job working for fairly lucrative but uncertain returns, or take a job that is less lucrative overall but more assured. Some of that comes down to personality, some to what else the person has to consider in their life (whether they have children, a partner in a steady job etc.)

But after taking the stress of uncertainty into account, the only meaningful figure to be talking about is the average. If you're going to make a point of the minimum, then you need to equally take into account the maximum too.

DadDancer · 30/10/2012 21:33

why do you see insulting someone in a discussion as objectification ?

As someone who has received the brunt of the insults it makes perfect sense to me, as i am a basically an object of ridicule to some people on here. (or just call me a human dart board Grin). As they don't like my views they consider me as a lesser person (eg. a neanderthal as 'halloween' implied earlier today) and this is real objectification not assumed objectification.

One of the main lines of argument from the antis is that lap dancing clubs objectify women. But how do they actually know this to be true? they just assume this is how people think, or even want to believe this is how people think. Making this assumption is itself real objectification, as they are implying that all customers of lap dancing clubs are lesser individuals who can't possibly have respect for the dancers and are unable to distinguish between fantasy and reality or see them as normal human beings. From my experience this assumption couldn't be further from the truth.

LineRunner · 30/10/2012 20:44

That's really interesting, thank you for the link.

GetAllTheThings · 30/10/2012 20:33

Interesting article here from the Wall ST Journal....

Seems like a good idea.

*The city of Houston is turning to an unusual source to help fund rape investigations: strip clubs.

The City Council passed an ordinance Wednesday that requires strip clubs to pay a $5-per-visitor fee to help pay for the analysis of biological evidence collected from rape victims in hopes of identifying their attackers.

Cash-strapped Houston is looking to an unusual source to finance rape investigations: strip clubs. The city council voted Wednesday to require strip clubs to pay $5 per visitor to help analyze biological evidence from rape victims.

Police in Houston, and in many other parts of the U.S., lack the money to promptly analyze evidence such as hair particles and blood specimens, gathered by investigators in packets known as rape kits. Houston estimates it has 6,000 rape kits that have yet to be scrutinized by crime laboratories*

LineRunner · 30/10/2012 20:09

I understand after just a little light googling that there has been a decrease in crime in Portsmouth city centre following a series of initiatives reported publicly and widely, carried out and paid for by the Police, the Council, the NHS, the third sector (eg Street Pastors) and the pubs in the Best Bar None Scheme. These initiatives include a 'cumulative impact' policy.

There has been a number of license suspensions and closures of licensed premises.

There has been a specific campaign to halt drinking and violence, supported by a number of the pubs.

TheDoctrineOfSnatch · 30/10/2012 19:58

I figured that out but my brain still goes to cycle kit first...

LineRunner · 30/10/2012 19:48

SEV in Portsmouth.

TheDoctrineOfSnatch · 30/10/2012 19:46

The last few posts have been very confusing as, to me, Wiggle is a cycle kit shop Grin

LineRunner · 30/10/2012 19:45

I mean, I'd never have seen this stuff if someone hadn't mentioned Wiggle upthread.

LineRunner · 30/10/2012 19:44

Has Wiggle really still not got Planning Permission?

TheDoctrineOfSnatch · 30/10/2012 19:42

Does anyone know of any studies regarding any effect on the behavioiur of people visiting LDCs with their partners/spouses?

Sausageeggbacon · 30/10/2012 19:34

Cool Linerunner, I would love to know what the police ascribe such a massive drop in crime to. And lets assume it was something else there is still the downturn of rape in Newquay and the adjusted figures for Lilith. I read back over "that blog" and one guy claims to have figures showing that rape and violent crime is not associated to LDCs. He gave an e-mail address so I will ask for his figures about it. Without knowing how he got the figures not sure his statement is provable or not.

TheDoctrineOfSnatch · 30/10/2012 19:28

Thanks linerunner

LineRunner · 30/10/2012 19:22

I will be happy to ask for and provide the transcript of the digital recording from the Portsmouth Licensing Policy Committee Meeting.

Has Wiggle got Planning Perrmission yet?

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