My sister has been hurting her son

OP, make sure you refer your parents to IPSEA and SOS SEN for support and advice with ensuring your nephew's needs are met. It's great that you are helping by paying for therapies, but really he should be getting these provided by the NHS and local authority.

OP you have nothing to feel guilty for, the only guilty parties are your sister and her partner. All you can do is what you are doing, and it sounds like your nephew has a loving extended family to care for him. As the parent of a vulnerable non verbal child I applaud that teacher and thank goodness this has been stopped and hopefully he can begin to recover.

Moving forward I would be conscious of making sure your parents are coping ok and getting whatever support they need in place- they might need someone to help them stand up to the authorities and fight for things your nephew might need especially into his teens/adulthood. Don't underestimate the magnitude of this but for now just love that little boy because it sounds like he needs it more than ever, poor wee soul xx

Read the thread? The op says he’s being taunted, pushed and shoved by the boyfriend. The mother is ‘contorting’ (I guess twisting??) his arms and face (grabbing maybe) whilst snarling at him while he's frightened and having a meltdown. His teacher has said she suspected abuse and it’s come to light after his nan found physical injuries. And if this is just what she’s willing to share in family videos, imagine the things that they’ve not seen. I can see why the op doesn’t want to share more details. Does that sound like a smacked bum to you?

All I can really offer right now is money and a listening ear. It doesn't feel good enough.

Believe me, both of those things will be helping your parents and your nephew enormously right now, particularly if either is otherwise in short supply.

Horrified to read this, but delighted he's safe now. Poor little thing. We so often only read about these children when it's too late.

Very sad indeed. For the sake of the child, I hope you get the chance to take care of him should your parents be unable to.

The fact she's your sister goes out of the window. She's a child abuser and nothing more.

I'm glad he's now getting the help he needs. I was going to ask abour the police but looks like it's all in hand.

I’m so sorry OP, this is heartbreaking.

I have a non verbal, autistic dd and the thought of this is horrific. I was going to ask if you were sure the bruises were caused by his mum/stepdad as my dd bites herself and often has bruises up her arms. The school have never been suspicious though because she does it there as well so they know how she’s getting them. If there’s actual video footage however clearly that’s not the case.

Be wary that it could be the only reason his mum and stepdad want him back is benefit related. Children with autism often claim dla (which is a lifesaver if used properly! Not bashing at all here). I imagine if they are capable of abusing their son/stepson, they are capable of claiming his benefits and spending them on themselves. Years ago I attended a group for children with disabilities. I remember talking to a woman who was fostering a child with severe, life limiting disabilities. She felt she was too old to adopt her but was terrified of her being adopted by anyone else just in case they were seeing it through the view of pound signs. The last I heard the fostering parents did actually adopt her because they couldn’t stand the risk of it.

I really hope your parents get custody of the little boy and your sister and her partner see the full repercussions for what they’ve done. Thinking of you 💐

Thank goodness for your parents.
The little chap will be protected.

If the child is now safe, remanding either one or both of them into custody would have no real effect, except to put further pressure on the prison population numbers.

It must be devastating to learn the sister you loved and we're proud of was a child abusing bully. I'm so sorry, OP.

I hope you are all able to give your poor young nephew the love and support he needs, now that he is safe.

Thats heartbreaking , just utterly heartbreaking. Your family did the right thing, I think the best you can do is throw everything you can at keeping them away from him. I can’t imagine doing that to my own child let alone letting someone else do it. Main thing is he’s currently safe and cared for. You didn’t know and when your family did find out they acted. You trusted your sister to be a loving mum and protector of her child, thats not a fault in you or your family.

I also they come down hard on your sister and her partner, abusing a child is one of the worst things you can do imo, neither of them should be allowed around children full stop.

Thank God for the teacher spotting the abuse.

Read the OP's posts. No, not a smacked bum.

When you say abuse, do you mean a smacked bum when he's been naughty kind of thing? The reason I'm confused is that she has shown videos of it, surely you wouldn't show people videos of it if you were seriously abusing your child?

Am so sorry this happened to the little boy by the person he should've trusted the most. Where's dad in all this?

Thankful that the family have got together to care for the little one now, I hope that he will not be permanently damaged by this experience and with the right care go on to have a calmer, peaceful life. Thankful for the school.

I also hope they throw the book at your sister and her partner and any future children they may have together are removed instantly.

What an awful shock OP - you must be reeling.

Tbh, as long as your nephew is away from the nasty fuckers it probably doesn't make a lot of material difference how long it is until the court date, although I can understand why you are frustrated by this. The main thing is that your nephew is now safe and being cared for by your mum, and that you and your mum are continuing with his therapies etc.

The one good thing (bear with me) about your sister being stupid enough to record the abuse is that it can be used as evidence against her in court.

I am so sorry that this has happened. Your nephew has had a rotten start but he now has caring family members to look after him thank goodness. Thank goodness the school and your mum noticed that things weren't right, and reported it; well done to them.

Seems unlikely they’d be remanded in custody if your nephew is now safe and they’re adhering tk any bail conditions.

It could take a long time for a charging decision by police.

Your family has done the right thing by protecting him .
He sounds like he is now surrounded by good people who have his best interests at heart . He is loved .

Have there been signs in the past she is capable of this?

Why do you think the child is now living with his GPs?