I feel awful for BIL and very guilty for even writing and thinking this. Like maybe I should just be less judgemental and keep my nose out of it.
He got married to his best friend since high school. They got engaged very quickly after dating just weeks and their wedding was 7 months later.
It could be love but could be desperation and comfort. We asked him many times about her over the years and he said they are very incompatible for marriage.
They both got rejected and rebounded onto each other at the same time. He really wanted a parter and family. So DID she. She comes from a very poor family in an Asian culture, and his is wealthier from the same country. So she has struggled a lot in life.
3 months after the wedding she no longer wants kids, ever. She says she wants to travel and have fun. He looked so deflated. He thinks she will change her mind. He doesn't know what to do if they don't. They're late 20s. They argue all the time. He is very mild natured so it's hard to imagine him arguing back. I've known him for 10 years. We went away with them recently and every tiny thing he did wrong turned into a 45 minute argument. Stuff I wouldn't even raise if DP did. She didn't really accept a quick apology from him but wanted to argue. He looks like he's madly in love with her but very worn down and unhappy. Other than this she is a nice person.
It's been 6 months of marriage now. They come from a culture where it's very hard to find a partner if you're divorced. I know he fears he won't find someone as he was single for 6 years and got exhausted with the apps. He is financially supporting both of them. She quit her job when they got married because she didn't enjoy it and is now trying to monetise her hobby.
She is very beautiful and has lots of lovely qualities about her.
My DP is very unconfrontational and diplomatic and trying to support his brother by asking lots of questions but he is being a good cop. He never would give his opinion just be an ear. No-one else knows about the kid thing. My MIL cried because she felt her son was being abused emotionally because sometimes SIL screams at BIL but they argue every single day. They all live together. MIL feels theres already a bit of tension so she can't raise anything. BIL is good at listening but always keeps his cards close to his chest.
Is this none of my business? do I just stay out of it? It's been on my mind a lot.
I am also close with BIL.