Both are good with strong academics. But they are very different.
Given Tonbridge is a traditional public school with higher end fees, it quite simply is posh in a way Judd will never be. The families who send their kids to Tonbridge are mostly extremely well-off. The majority at Judd will be from solid middle class families, but of course there’s a wider range.
In the end, I think you choose based on whether you want the high-end public school experience or not. If your child is at a Prep now, presumably you’re more familiar with private school approach and ethos. Have your kids ever attended state schools and are you aware of the funding issues? The funding issues will certainly make it a different experience…..and it depends how important that is to you.
Judd will and does deliver excellent academics and an extremely good extra-curricular and pastoral support, despite its poor funding. But if you’ve been at a Prep, will you be happy with the often scruffy facilities and larger classes? Does that matter to you? Or do you want the shiny facilities and approach where the school will bend over backwards to accommodate parents? Schools which charge high fees often accommodate parents and their wishes however unhelpful to the school community, because they are so keen to please their paying customers. Quite often, some of the troubles such school have, are partly a result of that. But the parents don’t see that or understand it, and often feel that having paid the large sums, they want to be have almost instant access and to have exactly what they want or they think their child needs, regardless of the impact on the wider school. You can consider if you want to be able to get a reply from the school within a few hours and have staff bend over backwards to deal with issues very very quickly. You won’t get that level of ‘service’ in the state school, because parents quite simply have far less importance. Therefore, if you think there are pastoral issues that need sorting out, unless it’s something pretty significant, you might have to wait longer….actually how serious issues are dealt with might be better, but minor issues which seem important to you, but the school judges as not significant might have to wait for longer, or you might feel that you’re not being heard or responded to. Parents from private schools are often surprised to no longer be treated as ‘the customer who is always right’ because it’s a different approach.
If you can afford Tonbridge without too much sacrifice and are seriously considering it, then it probably indicates that you do value what Tonbridge offers. It suggests it might suit you better than the state option. Many people apply to Tonbridge but who are desperately hoping for a state grammar place. They will push themselves and accept huge sacrifices if they don’t get the state place, but Tonbridge would never be their choice because of the financial side.
I’d say that if you want the luxury experience, Tonbridge is for you. If you want the great academics and extra curricular without the cost, it’s Judd. The decision really will come down to that and if you are able to comfortably pay and think the extras are worth it.
Personally, I couldn’t choose to pay the fees for the slightly better extra curriculars (shinier facilities without a doubt, probably more teams and more activities….but then can any boy take part in all 100+ activities anyway….the 50+ offered by Judd will be more than enough for any individual boy) and the more plush experience and what is no doubt, as easier, smoothed ride through school. Judd is a top top academic school. It’s not that the free option is the ghetto school…but I know some will still feel Tonbridge is worth the huge outlay for the things it offers. That’s fortunate for those on the WL for Judd who won’t be able to consider Tonbridge anyway.
No right answer, but I don’t think the final decision will really come down to pastoral care, but if you value the public school experience.