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Original poster

To be miffed at "Gift list for mother of the baby" enclosed in *Baby naming ceremony* invitation?

992 replies

doubleshotespresso · 12/06/2013 23:38

So some close friends (who married in church), but now claim to be atheist are holding a naming ceremony for their 8 month old first baby in an hotel.....

The invitation is beautiful with a map, timings "event closes at 11pm"?

The gift list ranges from £30-to £300, all items for the mother, cosmetics, trinkets, jewellery, pampering breaks, personalised hand-bound stationery and photo albums...

Anybody know the drill for these naming ceremonies? Are we supposed to guess a gift for the baby? Or just congratulate the mother for deciding on a name?

I have read this a dozen times and am staggered beyond belief-DP read it and fell into hysterics....

My gut tells me to go along with Jo Malone scented nappies or something.

Somebody please tell me this is not normal?!?!?!

OP posts:
Xiaoxiong · 25/06/2013 12:17

I can't imagine a scenario where you wouldn't invite them, and give them every mark of respect and appreciation you would show your PILs to be and your own parents. A wonderful thing to do both for your H to be and your stepchildren, and for yourself too - they sound like stars.

Ponders · 25/06/2013 12:14

from the way they behaved when they heard about your engagement I think they would be most offended NOT to be invited. they love you!

but maybe your DP should speak to them before the official invites go out? along the lines of "of course we want you to be there, and would love to share the day with you, but if any parts it would make you too sad we will understand if you'd prefer to miss those"

???

beginnings · 25/06/2013 12:12

Invite them Double, no question about it. Make it clear (not in the invitation but in a conversation) how happy you would be if they would attend all of the event but even some of it, depending on their levels of comfort. I think inviting them is such a lovely gesture that they can only be pleased. They sound like such wonderful people.

Earthymama · 25/06/2013 12:10

I read so many things on MN, see so many things in RL that make me question the values and attitudes of people today.

And now this; you have restored my faith in human nature.

Congratulations, you deserve small the Blessings in the world.

Original poster
doubleshotespresso · 25/06/2013 12:08

My Mum ( oracle on EVERYTHING) thinks we should invite them as we have always got on extremely well and they will continue to be part of our lives with or without a wedding..... Am getting myself in a bit of a pickle over this aren't I ? Blush

OP posts:
Original poster
doubleshotespresso · 25/06/2013 12:07

Oh dear God- just read the wedding thread- seriously got palpitations reading it!!!! No just no!

LOVING all the links to sailor suits, knickerbockers and puffy dresses.... Have stored them and will put them to use later...... Wink.....

Queens House IS beautiful yes..... I really need to get thinking about these things don't I ? Never imagined I would be doing this so will have to get some ideas together I guess..... Have no idea yet, but am sure it will be great, as long as all the right people come I am happy..... Grin.

MusicalEndorphins - yes poignant is the perfect word to describe the moment with DSCs grandparents..... I cannot fully put into words how heartfelt and bittersweet it was, I got so tearful when I relayed it to my Mum on the phone that evening and I have worn the bracelet constantly since receiving it... We have decided to invite them as they will have 3 grandchildren being joint Best Men and Matron of Honour..... Have suggested to DP that we give them the option to join us for reception as the actual wedding will be understandably so painful for them. Really would love them to be there, but will make it clear we understand if they prefer not to attend...... I wish I could make it painfree for them, just cannot imagine what a mixture of emotion they must feel, they were just so lovely that it feels right for me to invite them, any thoughts peeps?

We are desperate to do the right and most considerate thing by them....Confused

OP posts:
MumnGran · 25/06/2013 11:48

I am so going to print off pictures of sailor suits and kilts .....
oh, oh ....and seriously chiffon puff for DSD [grins]
(although she may call childline!)

MusicalEndorphins · 25/06/2013 11:46

I hope that made sense!

MusicalEndorphins · 25/06/2013 11:43

I love this thread, and how everything worked out in a way you never would have ever imagined! When the childrens grandparents so graciously accepted and congratulated you all officially becoming a family, and you especially, to be a mother for her departed daughter's children. The word poignant came to mind.

beginnings · 25/06/2013 11:42

Double congratulations!! What lovely news. Since you became engaged at Greenwich (and not wanting to appear as a DDP at ALL), might I suggest the Queen's House in Greenwich as a wedding venue? I was there at a wedding a couple of years ago and it is just fabulous. If you're not doing a church wedding, I actually don't think I have been to a more stunning civil wedding venue.

Also, I think you need to tell DSD that clearly, pink is NOT the colour of choice for any self respecting bridesmaid or matron of honur, it's peach! Something like this maybe?? Perfectly "on-trend" for someone of her age.

SoupDragon · 25/06/2013 11:37

Knickerbockers! They would be perfect

Original poster
doubleshotespresso · 25/06/2013 11:21

I am so going to print off pictures of sailor suits and kilts...... I will leave them by the playstation for maximum effect. You ladies are genius! Much fun to be had he methinks!!!

!Xiaoxiing I will check that Fronk has not struck again!

In the office today and told everybody engagement news- by ten o'clock they had arranged a card and flowers..... Made being in the office much better!

OP posts:
Guerrillacrochet · 25/06/2013 10:55

Came across this thread earlier and got hooked, read all of it and cried in several places- double what a lovely, lovely person you sound. I couldn't be happier for you, what a wonderful story. Flowers

Xiaoxiong · 25/06/2013 09:40

Are kids today still saying jank and janky?? I remember that being a sort of old school insult back when I was in high school (1998-2001)!

doubleshot I think you need to hie yourself over to this thread Grin I think Fronk may have struck again with that bridezilla's wedding.

PS Don't rule out pink! We had a vague set of wedding "colours" - cream, green, pale pink - which was governed by the fact that DH looks fab in pink and peonies and freesia were in season (and therefore cheap - we did our own flowers).

Thumbwitch · 25/06/2013 08:51

My first thought was cravat for old time wedding, tbh. Not bow ties. But then, she could have been talking about kipper ties... Wink

I'm liking the sailor suit and kilt suggestions though! Grin

MumnGran · 25/06/2013 08:00

" .....sailor suits " Grin

...or kilts. Threatening them with wearing "skirts" should end all resistance to a carnation in the buttonhole Grin Grin

SoupDragon · 25/06/2013 07:46

Find pictures of page boys in sailor suits. That'll shut them up :)

Ponders · 25/06/2013 00:27

my first thought was bow tie
second was cravat

but who knows when 'the old days' were in their heads? Wink

Original poster
doubleshotespresso · 25/06/2013 00:11

We think she meant a cravat, but not entirely sure! Very early days for plans tbh, but no pink would not be a colour I would ever choose......

Teenspeak dictionary? Hmmm it would rquire constant updating....... Grin

OP posts:
Bogeyface · 25/06/2013 00:05

Is a tie "like from the old days" a kipper? A bow tie? WTF?!

Please persuade your DSC to create a dictionary of teenspeak for us oldies!

Oh and I would go for cerise pink for the most jank colour!

echt · 24/06/2013 22:03

What a splendid ending. Congratters all round.

HaveTeaWillSurvive · 24/06/2013 21:54

I am actually in love with this thread - congratulations Grin

Just had to explain to DP why I was grinning like a loon at my ipad and sniffling...

Original poster
doubleshotespresso · 24/06/2013 21:12

DSS Twin boys are 14 and DSd is 11.

Their language baffles us, I think that is generally the idea... It drives DP absolutely mental when they talk like this, it makes mealtimes translate like a meeting of gangsters sometimes and when their friends join them it becomes multiplied by 100....

They are forever getting told off and just revert to it when they think we are relaxed, but it is very tedious and exhausting.....

None of them have any idea how ridiculous they look and sound, white kids in their school uniform, talking like Jamaican rapstars..... It can be maddening and entertaining in equal measure....

OP posts:
Ponders · 24/06/2013 20:54

how old are the DSC? their lingo baffles me Grin