Rainbow babies- for all of us holding, pregnant with and trying for our rainbows. While remembering all our darling angels

blue what type of plants were they? And where abouts on the grave had you planted them?

Oh Blue I'm sorry :( That must have been so upsetting to see. What plants had you planted there? I hope they grow back for you, lots of plants do I think. I know nothing about gardening however!

We stopped at the churchyard yesterday on our way home, wanted to have a look at the plants we'd planted on Sterre's birthday 2 months ago. When I got there, they were all gone... :( The gardener had just done the grass and he just mowed over the whole of Sterre's plot... DH said they might grow back, but I'm not sure. Think we might need to get a flower pot to put things in so they don't get ruined.

Looking forward to a week off and my birthday on Thursday :)

Thinking of all our little miracles on this Day of Hope x

Thank you all for thinking about me yesterday. We got through it. Just as sad today, but I feel very different. It is a new chapter, but the same book and Dexter will always be part of my story.

I hope your day passes peacefully first. I spent the day crying while painting, crying while walking the dog, crying while tidying the office and crying while doing chores. You will get through it, even though it is sad, and we are all here for you.

Two weeks trickle! forever and no time at all. I hope nothing exciting happens and it is boring as all heck

WTW Your littlest one is just beautiful. I have no experience, but I am not surprised she has stirred up emotions. So much joy and love, but also thinking about what could have been. Thinking about you.

Fan glad you are feeling better.

Elly I am on the clearblue trial, but am defering starting it for a month. Until after my op basically. AF started yesterday as well, worst possible day for that I think! But that is now three I have had in three months, and just from temperature taking I think I am ovulating. So looking at that as good news. Glad you got a :) Hope you enjoy your busy weekend!

The Day of Hope link Mias has put up is just lovely. I don't tend to talk about Dex much on facebook but I did share one of her pictures today. I love her sunset name and butterfly pictures too.

Thinking of everyone, even if I haven't name checked. I really did appreciate all the messages from people thinking about me. More than I can say. xx

drat, here's the real link Day of Hope

Hello, I have seen this http://carlymarieprojectheal.com/international-dates/august-19th-day-of-hope Day of Hope a few times on FB today, and it seems right to share it here, especially for those of us who have families and friends who find it difficult to speak about our beautiful children,...

August 19th is about honouring and remembering the lives of babies and children that could not stay with us. By doing this we are speaking out about the death of babies and children.

August 19th is a day to break down the walls of society that keep pregnancy, infant and child loss a hush hush subject. People view the death of a baby as just a sad thing that happened. These babies that die are not sad things that happen. They are people, much loved and wanted children. They are brothers, sisters, nieces, nephews, grandsons and granddaughters.

August 19th is about openly speaking about these children and celebrating their short lives.

By having this special day once a year we get people speaking about pregnancy, infant and child loss. And by doing this we break those walls down so that people are not afraid to speak about these children anymore.

With love to you all, your angels, rainbows and your families, from Mia and me. xx

Hi all thank you xx much appriciated, this thread is a life line at times - brings a whole new meaning to the two week wait I think

I have traps HAHA (and mice that are avoiding them )

Woke up this morning to a nice email from my aunt and some amazon vouchers for our wedding anniversary - we had forgotten about it . So now we have the hard task of finding a film to go see on the 27th and thinking of something to get from amazon, DH has ruled out baby items so I'm at a bit of a loss as you can imagine it's a bit of a switch to think of something for us (nursing bra's don't count).

wtw ((hugs)) no ides what to say but with all luck I will be joining you on that emotional rollercoaster soon . Just don't let anyone else tell you how to feel and don't be guilty about any of it.

moomins hope you are feeling healed after that stitch, so glad they are looking after you

blitzy and Fan Really hope things get easier soon for you both.

sorry if I've missed anyone take care

I had & still do lots of conflicting emotions :happy,sad,relief , regret etc... Regularly still do. Also, your hormones are running wild at the moment which doesn t help... Again, in my experience what you re feeling is perfectly normal. Sure the others will agree with me? Enjoy Holly but go with the sadness also xxxxx

Hi ladies, thank you so much for all your lovely messages. Holly is just perfect, am feeling quite overwhelmed to actually have her here. Have been quite tired and tearful today though and feeling a lot of sadness for Erin. It's been very emotional. Did others feel the weight of their previous loss come flooding back strongly after the birth of their rainbow? It's a bit like I've been repressing my feelings about Erin just to get through the pregnancy and now I'm grieving for her all over again.

2 weeks trickle wow! Sounds like you're having a very stressful time though - hope some of it gets resolved before the birth.

Fan and Blizy my friends sounds like you've been having a rough time xx

Glad the stitch went well Moomins

Kleine thanks for asking after us At some point I will get round to adding a pic of Holly

I'm sorry I haven't read back very well so can't name check everyone but I'm thinking of you all and very grateful for all your support over the last few weeks xxx

Trickl, wow 2 weeks left! I hope they fly past in an uneventful blur! I hope you get the other stuff sorted too. X

Mech hope u re ok today? Xxx
Trickle hope the next 2 weeks fly by & u start to feel excited over your impending arrival ..xxx
Hope everyone's ok? Hot,hot,hot but fab to be the weekend xxx enjoy xxx

poppet, wtw is fine from what fb updates say, lots of pics of H. She's a cutie.

trickle hi, wow two weeks left. Not long to go. All this heartache will soon be worth it.

mecha just wanted to send you my love for today xxx

and love to trickle too - goodness, so many difficult things happening at once (and mice on top of everything... never fun to deal with). I hope so much that things are somehow sorted before LO's arrival - and that he/she is giving you lots of reassuring/calming kicks in the meantime.

fan glad you're feeling a little better. Sounded just awful.
elly yes, as moomins said, enjoy yourselves!!

Has anyone heard from wtw, how are they all doing? I'm not on FB so wouldn't know if she had posted anything there...

Mecha just popping on to say I am thinking of you and Dexter today, hope it's easy in you. Hugs x

Hiya trickle - can't believe you've got 2 weeks to go, won't say 'only' as it sounds like it's dragging and sounds tough. Nearly there xxx

mech thinking of you, I hope today is gentle for you. But if its not hugs to you.

Oh and we have mice, she's just given birth and NOWHERE sells traps, I cannot cope with hunt the dead smell that you have to do with poison EURGH

Oh trickle that sounds awful, what a hard time for you, I hope you manage to get it sorted.

mech, thinking of you all today, these dates can be so hard, I hope it passes gently for you (((hugs)))

Oh blizy that's so bad, why on earth can't they refer you through nhs? Can't believe some of the 'care' that goes on.

Glad your cramping has finally stopped fan, as if it's not bad enough to have AF to deal with anyway.

kleine well done for going out and washing the car - I never do that anyway!!

mecha is it you who was asking about the cb trial? I'm doing it now, am on day 23 and finally got a so guess what I'll be doing all weekend!!!

Hi to everyone else, hope there are nice things planned for the weekend.

CONGRATULATIONS wtw what a lovelly name, so happy everything went well and that Erin's stone is all done too, hope you are enjoying this time x

Sorry I havn't been around don't really have the energy to name check everyone, I know some of you are having a really hard time and are being treated badly so on your behalf.

I've got two weeks to go, a DLA renewal form (if they don't renew at the right rate DH looses his CA too and then he can't go to college and I'm not sure what happens to housing costs), DWP are playing silly beggers with a grant we are entitled to because someone can't read properly, so I still have no nursing bras or TENS hired, my wheelchair seating is wrong and needs rearranging, I'm not going to be abel to take the outdoor test before the birth now, P.A. is on holiday this week and I can't lift my legs anymore so have moved downstairs as my shoulders are starting to give out and I keep torturing myself about movement.... only... two... weeks.

Only

Luckily DH is nesting or I'd really be going mad

mech thinking of you today. I hope that you find some peace. Unfortunately I can empathise with how you must be feeling. B's due date is next week and I'm dreading it. I'll be spending it alone as DH can't be off work. Planning to do lots of things to take my mind off it. It's strange. Unlike the actual anniversaries there's no time of day to "celebrate", it's an all day event. I hope that you find your way through ((hugs))

little we had to ring up the hospital several times chasing up PM results, I just rung the maternity unit and asked them. It was three months untill they read them to us. I just needed to do it, but I think it didnt make them come quicker.

blizy Im so cross on your behalf, can you not have a chat with your GP again? This cant help with your depression.

mecha well done you, little steps thats all you need to do.

Well Im feeling better this evening, cramping has finally stopped, it was awful and just like my old preiods used to be but with more clots. Ive had a search on fibroids again and its all normal for people with fibroids. I really hate it that I have them, they hurt and they suck!

I hope everyone is having a good night, its a hot one down here!

blizy and elly I am so, for you both. We are people, not numbers. I wish sometimes that could be remembered... Can you complain at all about the lack of prompt / personal / timely support?

We are still fighting with the hospital, who 'asked' us to be involved in their investigations about Mia, then went ahead without us, showed us their reports, and have now told us that our added comments and recommendations cannot be included... sorry, I have very little faith in hospitals now, which makes this pg even more challenging. As institutions, they just don't seem to care, even if there are wonderful individuals within who do their best.

fan oh lovely, that AF doesn't sound very good. I hope you are ok.

kleine well done to you. And yes, how I relate to those feelings of disbelief that this is my life now...

mecha glad to hear you are out. Sending gentle thoughts to help cushion your Dexter day tomorrow.

little9 yes, use the bereavement services to help you. You don't need to do that soul-destroying work.

blizy and elly that's utter rubbish, I just want to scream on your behalf. Why do keep having to fight for things.

I am having the AF from hell, its really painful and heavy lots of clots. Sorry! I'm not sure how normal this is, my back hurts and my legs. I feel so unhappy because of it. I think I might have to go to the doctors again.

I'm at work, so will catch up later properly, but it seams like a lot of us are not having a good time, wish we could have a group hug!