Just MC and ready to try again? Pack your cake, wine and tightie whities and join us for more ranting, weeping and most of all laughing! All welcome! (Part 12)

evening all.
izzy that sounds much better than pom juice.

mummya so sorry things have been so difficult for you the last few years. hell being hit by a bus is just bloody awful.

"Decidual bleeding is a term for a partial shedding of the uterine lining during the first few months of pregnancy. This bleeding can be similar to a menstrual period and can occasionally prevent women from realizing that they are pregnant until other signs develop." That's what i think i had last time, and why i got so mental last week.

If this time is a start of a new trend then mine is definately lighter than pre mc. 1st was normal this one lighter.

I need a bit of advice not sure what to do. today is first day of completely no spotting, my possible ov days are 5th, 7th, 9th and 11th. i have to get sessions in that could cover all days but that aren't every other day and having dh moaning. (not groaning .)i had thought of tonight, 6th 9th and 11th. so i mostly have a 2 night gap. but should i wait till i have ewcm? i'm worried that firstly i'll finish him off before ov time and then he won't be able to do it when i really need to. but then i'm also worried that i'll not do it enough and miss it again like last cycle.

What i'm asking is should i do it tonight with no ewcm or leave it. last cycle i seemed to get ewcm at a different time to when i think i ov'd. help..

I hope your session goes well today.

Welcome Hils Sorry for your loss and that you find yourself here.

By Weds do you meand your mc started yesterday? Gosh that's so recent for you, i'm really sorry.

First of all I would say not to rush back to work on monday that is very soon. I mc late Dec and was due to go back after the christmas break but just couldn't face it. I think it takes more time than you think to physically and emotionally recover.

Its natural for your emotions to be everywhere. One minute you feel you're coping ok, and boom the next minute you are in floods of tears. Just let yourself feel however you feel. I made the mistake of trying to be 'over it' too soon because i felt thats was what was expected. Just give yourself the time you need.

I only joined this thread a week or so ago and the ladies on here have been amazing. Feel free to rant, vent, cry on us, we're here as support if thats what you need.

xxxxxxx

Hi ladies, can I join?

Am currently having my first MC after ttc #1 for the last 4 months. MC started on Weds at what would have been 5 weeks.

DP and I have decided to start ttc again straight aways as soon as the mc has finished, whenever that may be :(

I have no idea what to expect as don't know anyone else who has had a mc, hormones and emotions are all over the place ATM.

Any advice on what I should do? GP has signed me off work until Mon, but not looking forward to going back.

Its sounds awful mummya i just wish there was something i could say.... i have no words that will help.

OMG and your husband beng hit by a bus?? You have really had rotten luck.

I agree, you chole and Izzy have all been on here way to long and are deserving on BFPs. My fingers are crossed tightly for all 3 of you next month (and for myself of course ) Not that i want to get rid of you as you are a fountain of knowledge!!

Izzy Ta.

I hope we get BFP's too!!! The pressure is just unbelievable now, I feel like I am going to explode if it doesnt happen!

We have seen this counsellor before, a few years back when DH got run over by a bus (making our life sound great arent I?) and we also went back for a couple of sessions when I mc'd. Should have done more at that time really but it was hard to get childcare so we let it slide.

much love xxxx

mummya moan away on here as much as you want, that's what we're here for x

I meant it though, I do hope you get your bfp this cycle, you've had a spectacularly rubbish time of things and deserve a break!

Fx the counselling helps a little too. I think so much of it depends in whether you (both) click with the counsellor, so if for any reason either of you feel it's not right, don't be afraid to try someone else x

Thanks Izz you have listened to me go on about this for the longest I think, so you probably know I will find my optimism again soon. xxx

Hi,

and sorry if I sound snappy - I do appreciate everybody's support!

wannabe AS is Ashermans Syndrome. video link Its when you get scar tissue growing on the uterus walls or in the cervix usually caused by ERPC, c-sections, traumatic birth or infection. Scar tissue is quite hard to get rid of once established, it tends to just grow right back. I had an operation to remove it and then 6 weeks of high dose estrogen to help the lining grow rapidly before scar tissue can form, also an HSG afterwards to "flush out" any new forming filmy scars. Lots of ladies in the UK dont have access to good health care for this syndrome either. The best AS doctors are in the states and germany. There are only two in the UK (one private, one NHS) but they use slightly different (not as good?) protocols. I chose to get treated in England because it meant being with family which seemed easier at the time, but often suspect I might have been better off going to the USA. The vast majority of women with AS have to travel very far to get treatment, those that dont and have surgery locally nearly always end up with more scar tissue than they started with and then need repeat surgeries (by an expert). I am part of an international group of AS sufferers/Doctors and I read their stories everyday.

At the moment I cant really do anything except wait... and maybe moan a lot to you guys

Hi,

and sorry if I sound snappy - I do appreciate everybody's support!

wannabe AS is Ashermans Syndrome. http://21stcenturymummy.com/2010/07/07/ashermans-syndrome-interview-with-specialist-mr-adrian-lower/ video link Its when you get scar tissue growing on the uterus walls or in the cervix usually caused by ERPC, c-sections, traumatic birth or infection. Scar tissue is quite hard to get rid of once established, it tends to just grow right back. I had an operation to remove it and then 6 weeks of high dose estrogen to help the lining grow rapidly before scar tissue can form, also an HSG afterwards to "flush out" any new forming filmy scars. Lots of ladies in the UK dont have access to good health care for this syndrome either. The best AS doctors are in the states and germany. There are only two in the UK (one private, one NHS) but they use slightly different (not as good?) protocols. I chose to get treated in England because it meant being with family which seemed easier at the time, but often suspect I might have been better off going to the USA. The vast majority of women with AS have to travel very far to get treatment, those that dont and have surgery locally nearly always end up with more scar tissue than they started with and then need repeat surgeries (by an expert). I am part of an international group of AS sufferers/Doctors and I read their stories everyday.

At the moment I cant really do anything except wait... and maybe moan a lot to you guys

No no mummya mine are definitely not as heavy post mc - does that make you feel slightly better?

I know yours is a different situation and you won't stop worrying but there you, you're definitely not the only one with lighter post-mc periods. Mine used to be 5 days heavy - moderate, now 2 days moderate then 2 days light - spotting, but noticeably (to me) lighter.

Fx you get your bfp this cycle and can breathe a huge sigh of relief x

MummyA I'm sorry ((Hugs))... not that they make any bloody difference

Your not having access to good health care sounds like a nightmare. Whats AS? I wish i could reassure you. I am sure it won't stop you worrying but you don't know for sure that your lighter periods are what you fear. I think the aim of pointing out their heavier periods was that they changed, they didn't stay they same as before...that could just be the same for you..... i hope so.

Its a gloomy day for a lot of us today. I hope your counselling session brings you a little bit of relief though. xx

Oh, sorry mummya. I guess I was trying to indicate I was pg twice before with v light periods, but am really not helping am I? I'll shut up now. Sorry. And good luck with the counselling, today? X

err thanks guys but hearing about heavier periods post mc isnt making me feel any better. (sorry I know you are all just trying to help)

I am worried because many ladies who get treated for AS have a normal period after the operation (as I did) but then their periods get lighter and lighter again because the scar tissue grows back. Eventually they have to have another op. I cant really afford to spend another £6000 getting treated so I was just really hoping and praying I would be one of the lucky ones who only needs one op and then everything is fine. But now I am feeling really glum because the last two periods have been lighter each time. My doctor in London has told me to come back and see him if I am not pregnant within three months (and 1st month = strike one) but I dont think I will be able to afford to do that, so I am just panicking instead. If I get pregnant very soon there is a good chance that any filmy new scar tissue forming wont be able to take hold as the uterus grows and stretches, but if I dont I will be pretty much back to square one (only poorer)

cep I dont get clots, I dont get much of anything, I didnt have periods for 8 months after my mc. what is decidual bleeding by the way?

sorry to be all doom and gloom today. Bring on the counselling! I need it!

Mine are much heavier post mc. they were 3-4days of med/light flow, and the first 3 after mc were very heavy, lasting 7 days+

The AC has sorted that now though, 5 days on med/light flow.

cep I misread that as porn juice and wondered what bizarre kind of conversation I'd walked into

aandr ooh best of luck with the planning - how exciting!!

mummya I don't think my periods are as heavy as they were pre-mc either, I just put it down to my body changing a bit. Just try to remember periods = fertile = eventual baybee

(((hugs))) to those feeling low, waves to everyone else x

knitter i doubt it, i'm still getting -ve's (last test tuesday) it was just a really odd af, no where near as heavy as "normal" and had loads of light spotting for a few days afterwards as well as the day of brown spotting before (not normal). have decided to test one last time on either sun or mon next week i only tested +ve last time 4 days after my af had been due to start. My 28 days is today so if i leave it till sun or mon (probably mon so no dss) however i suspect it'll be -ve and was just a weird af.

chloe i'm sorry you're feeling so low.

dw i'll call you dw as it reminds me of the little sister in arthur cartoons. I'm sorry you're having such a down day as well.

I'm not sure what words of comfort i can say apart from, it's natural (which doesn't help) and that you will come out the other side. hugs to you both.

mummya i don't want to pass my insanity on to you but could it be decidual bleeding? did you have the usual clots and stuff?

My preseed has arrived, it's not pre loaded so i can choose as much or little to use. i've also got my cb ov tests. need to take my p/apple and pom juice.

hello to everyone, hope you're all ok.

Mummy if it's any comfort my af was the same for years; medium flow accompanied by 3 days of agony, post mc it went to two days of the heaviest flow in the world followed by a dribble for a couple of days... I wouldn't read too much in to it chick, chin up

morning!

I vote we move Chocky to WTTC, she did say she was going to focus more on weight loss than TTC but I know she will be back at some point. Havent heard anything from BrownB in a long time so perhaps MIA is a good idea. DigitalGirl has announced her BFP on the recurrant buns thread, so perhaps we should move her too. (Congrats again digi!)

Love the SMEP experiment!

Zam sorry for encouraging you to buy up the whole pharmacy - hope it does the trick!

I am feeling very glum about my period, I have had 1 day medium, 2 days light, thats much less compared to pre AS when it was at least 5 days long and included a couple of days of heavy flow. Panic Panic Panic and then breeeeeeeath.

its not that early to test (in my books anyway )

wannabe I quite like your old name, I thought of you as a smiley border collie!

well done orange whoop whoop

Mummy glad you are moving forward and hoping it all works out well for you both, good luck with the sessions

loving the SMEP list good luck girls, the stat's are working in your favour

at AR slapping kntter was that a whitebait?? Here, have this haddock, the thwack is better <

AandR You seem to have found a healthier approach. I hope once all my emotions settle down i'll be able to do the same. Your House Build sounds interesting?? Actually we found a potential barn conversion just after i mc. We started to look into it, but hit a bit of a brick wall on a lender and haven't really tried any other avenues since. I did think at the time having something else to concentrate would be healty.

Nickester and AandR thanks for the tips and link. We've got Fish Oil in so will get some Zinc and Selenium ACE. Thankfully neither of us smoke and our diet is fairly healthy...apart from his work trip to the state where he must have gained a stone in 2 weeks!!. Laptop thing is a good point....but i dont get the bath reference...are we supposed to keep them cool??? I like a good bath to get in the mood!!

PS i've changed my nickname as i picked Collie when i first joined during mc and didn't really think about it. Its a bit too close to my real name and nickname and am (overly)paranoid about any lurkers who may spot my ranting. Feel free to call me either on here though.

Knitter >>< consider yourself slapped (I have always wanted to draw one of those!!!)

Not sure about BrownB but Chokky said she wanted to concentrate of her weight loss so possibly wouldn't mind going into MIA for a while?

collie try this link

fertility supplements

I would certainly second a zinc tablet (a good one, separate to multi vit tab), a selenium ACE tablet (again separate to multi vit) Zinc and Selenium help to improve the motility, quality and lifespan of the swimmers. Also Fish oil. (essential fatty acids) 3, 6 and 9 this helps to improve the volume of swimmers/mucas.

Other than that... cut down on fags and eat healthy (although my DH had resumed smoking again by the time we conceived much to my and yes keep em cool x

Hope that helps x

xpost Collie I know the feeling well. I think we all have periods of obsessing about TTC (who am I kidding - long continuous stretches of TTC obsession) . I had a desperate desire to 'get back on track' and that I deserved to be pregnant as I had it taken from me. With a bit of distance from the event - and the distraction of obsessive sewing there for a bit, house building now and sometimes a little bit of thought going into my work - I am trying to rewrite my life plan and give myself time to get pregnant. It took me anywhere between 4 and 6 months for the last 3 times I have been pregnant and given the level of stress we are under at the moment, there is a good chance fertilised eggs are opting out of implanting until a more zen like womb is offered up. It is little wonder it isn't happening straight away but it will ... as a great man once said 'we will never give up'.

1. AandRMum
2. Zamster
3. MummyA
4. Izzy
5. YRMOTB
6. Velvet
7. Collie
8. Knitter
9. Chloe55

It feel that way YRMOB - our method will be much more scientific, of course! Izzy has her white coat and pencil in pocket look going so how couldn't it be?!?!

Chloe your request does sound very reasonable but unfortunately we don't seem to be able to order our lives off a menu [its unfair stamp of foot emoticon] - how cool would that be!? Make mine the Build Funky House with DH with a side order of children - heck throw a few extra children on top as well - wouldn't want the house to feel lonely! We go to planning committee tonight so I will be severely hung over tomorrow either due to severe depression or excessive excitement followed by WTF have we done!!!!!

collie adding to the list - keep laptop off his privates. Although going by personal experience and some of the posts on here - men do better with just one request at a time (or else you get accused of nagging even when the advice was asked for!) - so crush his vits into his food, remove any of his tight undies from the drawers, turn down the thermostat so the bath can never get too hot and just ask him to have lots of time snuggling on the couch (so there is no chance for the laptop being put on lap and he rests up for dtd) ...

Sorry a bit hyperactive at the moment.

I know that we are all in the same boat in this thread and so i am sure everyone will, or have once, probably felt the same. But i am feeling really pissed off right now. I suppose I?ve channelled my energies into getting pregnant again after my mc as a coping mechanism (which i don't think is actually working) as its the only thing i can think to do. But already I just fell so angry. I could have flung the thermometer across the bedroom this morning as all i could think was "why am i having to do this?" when just 6 bloody weeks ago i was planning how i would change our spare room.

I just feel cheated and robbed. And now desperate to be pg again. We were ttc before i mc but was quite relaxed about it all. Now i feel like i am just obsessing.

And then I read about chole and her day and the other oldies how have been ttc for a long time and I feel dreadfully selfish. I can?t imagine your own frustrations.

Sorry, I really just needed to vent!!!