Would you opt for a c section second time around?

OP in your position I would not go for the planned C section, and I say that as someone who had one emergency and one planned and recovered fine from both.

Although painful, it sounds like your first labour was relatively quick and with no complications. I would think about a different hospital and a clear birthing plan (including Epidural).

Wishing you all the best with whatever decision you make.

Same here. Horrendous.

To be fair, I couldn’t feel anything when I was pushing, though the midwife said I was doing it correctly. I suppose I could have stopped topping up the epidural and let it wear off a bit for pushing (it had a button I could press to top up), but there was no way I was going back to the kind of pain I’d been in!!

Ultimately, my daughter was in a very awkward position - she half turned to the side from back to back - so I don’t think she was coming out on her own. Her heart rate started to dip, there was some bleeding, they took us to theatre and got her out by forceps after failed ventouse. And just as well that they did because it turns out I was likely having a placental abruption- but that’s a whole other story.

I am in London and had a choice of St George’s and Chelsea and Westminster, and went for Chelsea and Westminster for the reason I mentioned. Not sure what your choices would be?

I think it does depend from trust to trust, and even on who is in charge on the day. Generally they don’t like to give you one before you’re 4cm.

I chose my hospital deliberately because I knew they give epidurals easily on request, and also have a low threshold for intervention (very important for me; I’m pretty medical in my approach to birth). The anaesthetist confirmed to me that they have a target of siting an epidural within 25 minutes of being asked for one. BUT that’s once you’re on the labour ward. When I was admitted at 4am I was put on antenatal, as I wasn’t dilated almost at all, despite strong regular contractions. The (agency) midwife there made it very clear that I wasn’t going anywhere near the labour ward, or an epidural, until 4cm.

The pain became unreal by about 6am, and I spent the next 6 hours howling in agony. I’m not a screamer at all, but I found vocalising was the only way I could get through it. In that time I begged and begged and pleaded for an epidural but was told over and over again no way until 4cm. I was offered paracetamol (complete joke!), codeine, and pethidine, which I absolutely did not want, but took in desperation after being told again no epidural was coming any time soon. The pethidine did absolutely nothing for the pain, but scrambled my brain and left me with several memory gaps.

Someone, I don’t know who, took pity on me around noon, and at still less than 1cm moved me to the labour ward, gave me the epidural and broke my waters. I don’t know who it was, but I’ll be eternally grateful to them, because I honestly don’t know how much longer I could have gone on like that. It was by far the worst pain I could ever have imagined, and to this day I can’t find the words to describe it. And the epidural did me no harm, because I dilated to 10cm within the next 4-5 hours after 18 hours of almost no progress at all.

God knows, I went in around 11 to have waters broke. Contraction started around 4pm when having a coffee downstairs, I went up to the ward and the gave me it straight away

I had an ELCS for my second , first was a vaginal delivery , no epidural ( my decision) but huge baby and a few issues during and lots after ( PPH requiring transfusion) . C-section was great , out of hospital quicker , moving pain free quicker , couldn’t fault it .

I wouldn’t have a cs unless it’s medically required. I’ve had one cs, there was no other way both of us would survive, and one VBAC. I had a near perfect recovery from the cs but was still in pain, had the numb area round my scar for years, nice shelf now, and sex was agony for a year. VBAC was painful during and I was sore afterwards but recovery was so much easier.
The best option would be to ask for the epidural to be given as soon as you arrive. You could ask for a consultant appointment to really push for this to be the plan for you.

I got an epidural as soon as I had my first contraction

I wouldn’t ask for a c-section if I was in your position. The recovery is long, and it can go wrong and cause complications.It’s major abdominal surgery!

First c-section I had major issues with the pain meds not working that had me swearing she’d be an only child, then literally unable to sit up but still in pain because overdosed with a drug that didn’t work and then my milk was slow to come in as a result. Second time around I failed at not picking up my toddler (a small 21 month old) for 6 weeks and got an infection as a result.

You need to consider this issue if your eldest still needs lifting, it is very real. Also you cannot drive for 6 weeks after, which is also more of a problem if you have an older child.

You’d be much better to advocate for yourself to get an epidural earlier IMO.

No way would I choose a C section ever, that is for emergency only. I know two people who had c-sections and desperately wanted not to second time, three and a bit years later. One managed a natural birth second time around, albeit with venthouse, unfortunately the other girl had another emergency section but they didn't want that.

If you were quick last time you may well be quicker next. Try not to go into hospital too early, wait until labour is well underway. It's easier to manage at home, walking around and doing things in between contractions - as long as all is well of course. I went in as soon as my waters broke and gave birth a couple of hours later, easy peasy. Yes it did hurt towards the end but then it was over.

@Minimalistmamaoftwo I’m sorry that you suffered too. Credit to my hospital that at least they recognised that and gave me the epidural at 1cm. But it took 18 hours to get there and 6 of those were, exactly as you say, hell on earth. Glad the second time was a lot better for you at least, and huge respect that you had the courage to try again.

@EarlGreywithLemon i agree. My first baby was back to back and there was no break between contractions, I wanted to die. I was screaming for my husband to kill me, I had no pain relief and it was actual hell on earth, hell. my second baby was in a perfect position, lovely breaks between contractions where I could talk and drink and a few easy pushes to get him out, also no pain relief.

I had an emergency c section first time and will be having a planned one next, not even thinking about a VBAC

I went for sections for number 2 and number 3. That’s despite being given an epidural at 1cm in the first, vaginal birth (she was back to back, it was extremely painful, and I was not coping). In my case there were other medical reasons, but the pain alone would have been reason enough for me too choose a section. I found labour beyond excruciating. The C sections were sore for the first few days to a week if I forgot to take my painkillers. But they were never for one second as bone crushingly, breath takingly painful as labour.

My view on this is unpalatable to some, but here goes. Labour is sheer luck of the draw, a combination of your own body physiology, the position of the baby, and how they work together on the day. Those who think they aced it because of hypnobirthing/ breathing/ positive thinking / fairy lights / dark rooms/ no doctors around were just lucky on position and body shape. Those like me, who had pain so bad words cannot describe, couldn’t even move and ended up crumpled in a corner screaming in agony were unlucky. Many - most? - are somewhere in between. But it really is down to luck. Even if the additional medical reasons hadn’t been there, I still wouldn’t have rolled the dice again.

Also, for me, c section recovery with one and then with two other children at home was still easier than the vaginal birth recovery with only one newborn.

I’ve had easier recoveries and fewer ongoing issues from two c sections than friends with difficult vaginal births, but harder than friends with easy births. How either will affect you is very difficult to tell.

You can opt for a c section. Have you discussed it with your midwife? Some people find the hospital birth reflections service helpful. Its worth talking through why you didn’t get the epidural last time and what you can do to make sure you get one this time, if that’s what you go for.

Yes I did. Really great experience.

Yes, I was induced and had a 40 min labour, so no time for any pain meds (and gas & air did nothing for me except make an irritating noise).

Forceps, 3C tear. Absolutely had a c section next time! No questions asked, in fact it was recommended by the Birth Choices midwife.

ETA sorry don’t know why I quoted OP 🙄

Can you have it in your birth plan you want an epidural? I had a horrific birth first time round with limited pain relief, second time I had a wonderful, calm relaxed delivery due to the epidural. So much so I planned and fell pregnant within 8 months of DC2 being born. Now 28 weeks pregnant and planning the epidural again for my final go! C-section recoveries for a friend of mine was extremely hard and the physical and mental toll of not being as able-bodied as she was used to made her recovery really challenging. Although Dfriend did have an emergency c-section, I’m not aware if planned are any different.

I had my last 2 by C section, 1st emergency and 2nd recommended. I've been left with surgical adhesions ever since that have left me with chronic pelvic pain, and I've got a horrible numb area/overhang that isn't remotely attractive. If I'd known, I would never had agreed to the 2nd one. They are bandied around on here as the magical answer to labour but recovery is tough especially if you have older children. And no surgery is without risk.

I asked for an elective section with my second after a 5 day failed induction, emergency section and 8 days in hospital with my first.

Elective was so much better, much less pain as I hadn’t been poked and prodded for days and days beforehand and we could sort childcare out and explain it all to DC1. One night in the hospital and I was walking (very slowly) round the park the next day.

I would definitely go for another c section. I had a vaginal birth for number 1 and then a planned c section for my 2nd. I would choose the planned c section again. I hated being out of control during my first labour (nothing terrible happened but I dilated slowly and it took 4 days in the end and was extremely painful). I did need more help with our toddler afterward the operation but found I recovered more quickly (I had a bad tear during the vaginal birth). It was very painful initially but I went back into the pain killers for a few days it soon subsided.

I found that my original hospital said it was pro giving women the choice but in reality they weren't so I changed at 36 weeks to a hospital where they were really supportive of whatever choice I wanted and it was a great decision for me.

I had c section with my third. Two vaginal births were absolutely fine but I was much older with my final baby so they offered it to me and I was swayed by the convenience of being able to plan etc. I regret it so so much. The recovery was much longer. I was doing the school run within 24 hours of my second vaginal birth. And my body has changed irrevocably. Scar area is still
numb after 2 years and the pouch it has left behind won’t go without further surgery.

I think in your situation I’d be tempted to give birth in a different hospital where they have a different (better) attitude to women’s pain and bodily autonomy. My c section experience was very good but the recovery was painful so I’m not sure it’s the answer to what you need here.