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Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

Original poster

My dh just informed me that....

90 replies

BekkiKay · 17/01/2004 20:02

if women in childbirth would just be quiet and go off on their own behind a bush it would be easier, safer and the more natural way to do things.
I've argued until I was blue in the face that there is no such thing as natural and how could keping quiet help the birth process. He has just said thats what plains indians do. Before we kill each other in this debate could someone shed some light on childbirth in times past or less developed countries. Statistics very welcome-Zebra?

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nerdgirl · 17/01/2004 20:34

How about these statistics -

The women of Nepal are currently in the situation where 87% of them have no help from a trained professional when giving birth. One of these poor unfortunates dies every hour!

Tell him to get off his arse (which has never been ripped open by someone elses head emerging into the world) and kiss your feet for giving him children!

Or better yet, get him to come on here and defend his position!!

WSM · 17/01/2004 20:27

Poke something abnormally large and knobbly down his ahem and see if he copes with it in serene and controlled manner ! A sort of reverse-birth experiment.

Original poster
BekkiKay · 17/01/2004 20:26

Hes still not backing down. I've got to go now so I can't wait for any more info but I'll be interested to see if I can finally make him accept defeat onn this one.

OP posts:
lyndsey66 · 17/01/2004 20:24

Ask him that if he was having a limb amputated would he like to be sedated using the old fashion method of alcohol?!! Given the choice I am sure he would have a general anaesthetic!
Well I think child birth is the same prinicple!

Original poster
BekkiKay · 17/01/2004 20:23

ROFL! Oh thank god I came on here. If you spend long enough with my dh you'll start to believe anything.

OP posts:
WSM · 17/01/2004 20:23

I yelled and grunted the place down during my 3 hour pain relief free labour and birth !

Sounds like your DH just says a lot of these things to get a rise out of you, pathetic I know.

Chandra · 17/01/2004 20:22

Oh God, the indians again, being one myself I would like to advise to tell your DH that it would be certainly more natural, definitively easier (for the father who as a a good indian would consider the birth a women business, and left you to it), but about being safer... well, that's why so many of our ancestors died during birth (though I believe the white population used to sufer from the same problem before hospitals were introduced... )

Sorry to be sarcastic but if the human race have worked so hard in developing medical technologies there should be a very good reason behind it, can't help with statistics though, but I don't have anyfriend who have lost a child during birth, nor have I kne somebody who died at birth, my grandmother in the other hand can name a few.

Original poster
BekkiKay · 17/01/2004 20:21

My dh fell asleep during the birth of my second nearly 5 months ago and when he was woken up by the midwife near to delivery time he said "I know what your going through but I'm really tired and should get some sleep!" I still haven't forgiven him.

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GeorginaA · 17/01/2004 20:21

I remember during parentcraft with ds, the midwife solemnly informed us that we were all insane if we wanted drugs because women in africa only needed half a panadol for a caesarian.

I restrained myself from slapping her, but only thought of a good rebutal once I got home (which would have been "And what exactly is the mortality rate for childbirth in those situations then?"

This is not to say I don't really admire people who can get through birth without drugs and with barely a whimper (I'm hoping to avoid drugs myself second time around ... not sure about the whimpering), but it's really silly to beat yourself up if you need the pain relief or medical circumstances mean you need more intervention. It's a healthy baby at the end which counts, right?

Oh if only men could have the babies a la Arnold Schwartzenegger in "Junior"...

Lisa78 · 17/01/2004 20:21

slam his b***ks between two bricks and tell him to be quiet then

twiglett · 17/01/2004 20:19

message withdrawn

magnum · 17/01/2004 20:18

My dh watched me push my daughter into the world 7 months ago and afterwards commented " I could see where you were going wrong!!" Apparantly I was pulling back and not making each push count. he reckoned I could have had her in half the time if I'd done things properly. I thanked him for his constructive criticism.....not

Original poster
BekkiKay · 17/01/2004 20:17

I've tried that but he is very stubborn and won't give up even when he knows hes wrong. His favourite thing to say to me is Why do women complain about the pain of childbirth if they don't want the pain then don't get pregnant.
I just have to walk away.

OP posts:
WSM · 17/01/2004 20:13

Ask him how many babies he has given birth to ? ROFL emma

emmatmg · 17/01/2004 20:09

Bekki, ask him if he'd like to shit a watermelon in silence!

Not very consructive but hey-ho