Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Friend's dog bit a child, whose fault?

285 replies

karrabee · Yesterday 09:43

Dog was on a lead, probably 1.5 metres ahead. Family of 2 adults and 2 children walking past in opposite direction. Children probably 4 and 8? As they walked past the younger girl darted towards the dog and put her hand on his head (flat palm almost like she was hitting him but I think she was trying to pat him on the head) and he nipped her. We were passing each other on a path in a park so were quite close already. Had zero time to do anything as from her walking past to touching him happened in about 1.5 seconds. We had no interaction with the other family prior to this. Dog has never bitten before, we think he just got a fright from the girl, but the family went mad and started threatening to call the police saying we have a dangerous dog (he's am old staffy who has never bitten once and we were so shocked that he even nipped her as he is extremely gentle!). Family followed us round the park and kept shouting 'we know where you live, police are going to be well aware of you'. The girl wasn't injured, skin wasn't broken, but she was obviously scared. Surely this is the fault of the family for not teaching their children not to touch dogs? I don't have a dog so haven't really had to think about it before, but my son knows not to touch dogs without confirming with the owner that they're friendly. It is drilled into him!

OP posts:
Lovemuesli · Yesterday 10:36

My granddaughter loved patting dogs when she was younger and we picked her up from school. She always knew to ask the owner if she could pat their dog. (There were always a couple of dogs tied to railings). The owners always said yes.

It was the parents' fault. Children should ask before patting dogs.

Bitsostuff · Yesterday 10:36

If this had been a proper, aggressive bite then that would be the fault of the dog owner. A dog that will bite w no warning should always be muzzled. But a startled nip? That's just the response of a dog that's been taken unawares.

ExpressCheckout · Yesterday 10:35

Dog lover here. Basic rules apply here -

Parents - never allow your child to run towards a dog. Always ask permission before approaching a dog. Never shout or make sudden loud noises near a dog. Teach your child confidence, cheerfulness and common sense with dogs. Do not unwittingly teach your child to be afraid of dogs.

Owners - only use long leads in open locations where it's safe to do so. Don't use your phone whilst walking your dog. Shortened leads on paths, pavements etc. Full attention on your dog at all times. Oh, and the banned breed list applies to everyone, for good reasons.

PointyNoseDog · Yesterday 10:34

karrabee · Yesterday 09:43

Dog was on a lead, probably 1.5 metres ahead. Family of 2 adults and 2 children walking past in opposite direction. Children probably 4 and 8? As they walked past the younger girl darted towards the dog and put her hand on his head (flat palm almost like she was hitting him but I think she was trying to pat him on the head) and he nipped her. We were passing each other on a path in a park so were quite close already. Had zero time to do anything as from her walking past to touching him happened in about 1.5 seconds. We had no interaction with the other family prior to this. Dog has never bitten before, we think he just got a fright from the girl, but the family went mad and started threatening to call the police saying we have a dangerous dog (he's am old staffy who has never bitten once and we were so shocked that he even nipped her as he is extremely gentle!). Family followed us round the park and kept shouting 'we know where you live, police are going to be well aware of you'. The girl wasn't injured, skin wasn't broken, but she was obviously scared. Surely this is the fault of the family for not teaching their children not to touch dogs? I don't have a dog so haven't really had to think about it before, but my son knows not to touch dogs without confirming with the owner that they're friendly. It is drilled into him!

It’s the child that’s out of control not the dog. The parents are 100% at fault, they need to teach their children not to rush up to dogs and to ask before touching.

That said if the dog had been walking at heel instead of ahead, the owner might have had time to stop the child trying to touch the dog. My dogs are always beside me, between me and the wall/edge of path, not in the middle, one of them is quite anxious so I make sure I’m between him and anyone walking past, or towards us. I shouldn’t need to take these kinds of precautions, but sadly we have to because so many people think dogs are public property and they can touch them without asking.

I also notice that most people try to touch the top of a dogs head, even though this is quite a threatening thing for a dog, even when mine are backing away or moving their head out of reach people keep reaching over them. I know not everyone is a ‘dog person’ but surely if you reach to stroke the top of a dogs head and it backs away or moves you can take the hint??

Sunsunsuns · Yesterday 10:33

The parents fault.
Child should know never to touch a strange dog.
Muzzle time probably

Screamingabdabz · Yesterday 10:30

Dog owner should have drawn the dog in when passing young children. Especially a powerful breed like that. If it’s ’equal fault’ the child’s welfare still takes precedent.

LVPLVT · Yesterday 10:29

It’s the parent’s fault but now your friend will need to muzzle the dog when out in public.

Wiseplumnet · Yesterday 10:28

Parents should have taught children of this age not to approach or touch strange dogs. Dog was on lead and therefore under control, It wasn't muzzled but had no biting history. Like the poster up thread, I pull over with our dog to the side of narrow pathways until people have passed by. My dog has never bitten, but I could never guarantee how he wouldn't react to young children moving quickly toward him. The parents are responsible for keeping their children safe ( different if dog is uncontrolled in public). Definitely not the dogs fault and I doubt this would go further. You may want to preempt by reporting incident to 101 just so it is logged and you get your side in , if anything the family threatening you would be taken more seriously.

LaceFerret · Yesterday 10:27

It is the child's parents fault and also your friends fault equally. They should teach the child not to approach dogs, and your friend should keep it on a tight lead as common courtesy when passing unpredictable kids. I do this even with my small whippet who worships children. Because she's an animal! Thus is unpredictable too.

SoThatsTheWayItIs · Yesterday 10:24

grumpygrape · Yesterday 10:18

1.5m is not a long lead
Child should have been on a lead if it's likely to smack pat random dogs.

Too long for the situation of passing others, especially children on a narrow path. A bit of common sense on both sides and this would not have happened.

nc43214321 · Yesterday 10:21

Yes most parents ask if their child can stroke my dog before they go near her. If a child runs up to my dog I would usually move her out of the way and tell them she doesn’t like children. Just because I think it’s rude and children need to be aware not all dogs are friendly.

grumpygrape · Yesterday 10:18

1.5m is not a long lead
Child should have been on a lead if it's likely to smack pat random dogs.

Happytaytos · Yesterday 10:17

Both.

Dog needs muzzling now as it has bitten once.

Goinggreymammy · Yesterday 10:14

Both parents and owners at fault.
The girl should have been taught to ask permission and how to stroke an animal safely. The owner shouldn't have a dog on a long leash on a narrow path. So an accident happened. Accidents happen. The aftermath could have been handled better ...
Your friend should have apologised for the dog, explained he was startled, and asked if the girl was OK. Advise to ask before petting. Say they will keep dog on shorter leash in path in future.
The parents should have apologised for their child startling the dog, a d been understanding, not following people about the park shouting.

Barney16 · Yesterday 10:10

The child shouldn't have touched the dog. The dog shouldn't have been on a long lead.

Glesgalass · Yesterday 10:10

Fault on both sides, though it could be argued a dog on a 1.5m lead is not under control. The parent should have taught their child not to approach strangers dogs and your friend should have had the dog on a short lead.

Balloonhearts · Yesterday 10:05

Parents of the child. Running up behind an unknown dog and donking it on the head is pretty much going to guarantee it snaps at you. I mean, I'd do the same if some random smacked me on the head.

Ponoka7 · Yesterday 10:02

50/50, as said. When you're passing people the dog and children under 5 should be by you. From that far away you couldn't intercept a dog off a lead running over. It protects the dog, especially breeds like a Staffie, who can give as good, if not better than they get. It used to scare me when a small, unleashed dog, would go for my GS, because my dog would be blamed if he killed the other dog.

MrsShawnHatosy · Yesterday 09:57

To a dog a hand coming towards their head can feel aggressive. Obviously the little girl is too young to know that. But her parents should not have let her run ahead,

byedriver · Yesterday 09:56

Two things. Dog walker needs to be more proactive around keeping dog away from oncoming children (as already suggested keep to side on short leash). And secondly, this dog now needs to be muzzled when out. The outside world is unpredictable. If a dog is reactive when startled it's a problem, especially a dog with a powerful jaw like a staffy.

MrsLFii · Yesterday 09:56

I admit I missed the dog was on a long (extendable?) lead. That can’t happen again where there are to be strangers, particularly children, around, now this has happened. In an ideal world, people wouldn’t touch a random dog unasked but it’s not an ideal world and, regardless of blame, I wouldn’t want my dog to injure someone.

Gizlotsmum · Yesterday 09:55

Bit of both, girl should not have pet dog without permission but I would have had my dog closer to me when passing people

shiverm · Yesterday 09:55

i mean dog being on lead and presumably didn’t have the slack to approach the kid, and was able to be pulled back… I’m actually not a big dog fan in general (though love specific certain dogs) but I’d say not your fault. What more could you do? Not being a dog in general fan I’d teach wariness to my child even if inadvertently. That being said, not the fault of the child or child’s owners (jk) either. The dog was the one who bit. But very aggressive of them to follow you about. I’d be furious if my child got bit, but would I want to intimidate the (I can only hope) apologetic dog’s owner? Certainly not.

whats the phrase, ‘once bitten, twice shy’? Hopefully dog and child have learned a lesson.

SoThatsTheWayItIs · Yesterday 09:54

I missed the bit about being in 1.5 meter lead. Irresponsible of your friend I’m afraid when passing by on a narrow path.

SpottyPyjama · Yesterday 09:53

The Parents of the touchy child should have taught their children not to touch random dogs like that.

Most dog owners are very accommodating when parents try to teach their children how to safely interact with dogs.