Mother in law keeps calling me fat

Absolutely this,nasty bitch

It could be lipoedema or lymphoedema. Either way there is a solution - liposuction or lymph drainage with an experienced physio.
Retired physio, I was specialised in this and it works.
Please update us.
And tell your MIL to pound sand - it[s a medical condition either way.

To understand lipedema (shoild this be what the OP suffers from) you really do need to live it or live it via someone very close to you. It's not fat thatcan be lost through dieting or exercise

Tell her that each time she says this she is causing harm and is being hateful, damaging health,. Tell her to shut up, or go home.

Are you the MIL?

Could you afford to see a private lipedema expert?

I think you have to adapt - so you might walk around with a coffee a few times in Japan but then stop doing it as it dawns on you that Japanese people generally find walking around with a coffee uncouth.
The point being that you do that ordinary thing without bad intent. Hopefully once brought to your attention you change your ways!

I'd be setting her straight.

But at 93kg you're a size small on top?

I'm a size small on top and I am 56kg

Even if some cultures place a high value on maintaining a healthy weight, that doesn't give them the right to be rude and to fat-shame other people who they deem to be overweight.

OP's MIL sounds like a total bitch, irrespective of which culture she belongs to. She has started on her grand-daughter now who is at the age where her grandmother's horrible attitude towards weight could lead to her developing an eating disorder.

She needs stopping, this is awful
for you and damaging to your daughter.
Both you and your husband need to stop her every time very clearly

“Stop mentioning my body and weight - it’s rude”

“Any conversations about weight and shape are unacceptable”

”This subject is closed and off limits”

”MIL - stop!”

Does she know it’s a medical issue? Tell her - no need for details

”MIL - this is caused by a medical
issue under investigation and you are making it worse”

Seriously - call her out on it every time. What’s the worst that could happen?

At least now can we ignore this poster?

Why is this rude cow still staying with you? I don’t care if it’s her culture, it’s not acceptable and she’s been told this. And now she’s started on your DD? No way. She needs to go. Your DH needs to enforce this and stand up for you. If he doesn’t, he can go too. Don’t put up with this shit op.

You need to make her leave. Actually, no. Your DH needs to. You're going to end up with absolutely no self esteem left at this rate.

In the meantime, when she says something so hurtful, maybe suggest she trims her nose hairs or perhaps an upper lip wax. She'll go in no time when it's dished back.

If it helps, probably won't, I've been housebound since December. My neighbours were all having a natter outside and I hadn't realised, I went to take some recycling out to the bin. My next door neighbour literally shouted in front of this group of women 'Lil, you've got so FAT!!'. I was lost for words so just went back indoors and, tbf, everyone else looked so embarrassed and shot off.

What?! Christ on a bike, what utter bloody nonsense is this now 🙄

Just because your relatives didn't have a happy relationship, does not mean 'it doesnt work'.

I'm of mixed descent. Lots of people are in happy mixed cultural relationships. Of course it can bloody work!

She stays with you for up to a quarter of the year? She’s making these comments to you and your 11 year old.
You and DH have to sit her down and say it’s not acceptable. If she can’t stop making such comments she can’t come and stay. (Ultimately I would be restricting access to your child too.)

It’s a little different though because it is actively seen as rude in some cultures to ignore somebody’s obvious weight gain. Whereas in Britain ignoring it would be the polite thing to do, in some cultures it would be a sign you don’t care about them enough to notice small changes in their appearance. So her commenting on it is very much ingrained as the polite thing to do. So it’s a complete flip from British culture not just a small tweak, and will be difficult for her to adjust her behaviour.

It does seem an Asian thing to comment on weight. My son is married to a Thai lady and all her friends and family call him the fat one!!

I admit it is horrible and your MIL needs to be told it isn't acceptable.

So, it would be fine for us to go to somewhere like Japan and do something repeatedly that everyone in Japan found offensive whilst we wittered 'it's okay in my culture'

No? Thought not.

If someone is visiting the UK and have family here they need to adapt to our cultural rules and norms - so not insulting people.

She sounds like an insensitive twat.
Find the strength to call her out for this nonsense in front of your daughter so your daughter can see how completely unacceptable commenting on people's bodies is.

As an aside - I know someone who began microdosing GLP1 meds for their lipoedema and it has been very helpful to them/improved their lower body symptoms a lot.

When I've been to east Asia, commenting on size isn't a faux pas like here. It's more like a matter of fact.
Could it be that your MIL doesn't realise she's upsetting you?

I would say “if you say another nasty thing to me we’re going to have a serious falling out which would be very sad as it would mean you wouldn’t be able to visit again”

Absolutely irrelevant, don’t be foolish.