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AIBU?

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AIBU thinking this is just really irresponsible to get a kitten!

57 replies

Catswisk · 21/09/2026 16:22

Name change as I don’t want this to be linked to my other threads incase it’s outing!

since my DD started nursery she’s been friends with another little girl, naturally I became friends with the mum, both our daughters are now 11 and are still in the same school. We enjoy each others company and get along well etc.

a few years ago DH and I managed to get on the property ladder, shortly after moving in we got DD a kitten.

DDs friend then started nagging her mother for a kitten after seeing ours. So her mum bought her a cat too, shortly after getting the cat the mum was asking me costs for cat food and spaying insurance etc, they are more cash strapped than us as she doesn’t work, the mum has told me she is on benefits.

the mum has been making more comments to me recently about the cost of living and that cat food, litter etc all rising, they never had their cat spayed as it was too expensive, for that reason the cat is a house cat. She’s also said that she doesn’t insure the cat as the cat doesn’t go out.

None of the above really bothered me, the cat was always healthy looking relaxed and fed when we visit. However DD came home from school early last week and said that her friend has a new kitten.

I just don’t understand why you’d take on another animal knowing you’d struggle to afford them. I’m a huge animal lover and I just don’t think it’s right, AIBU to stop hanging out with this woman?

OP posts:
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OriginalUsername2 · 22/09/2026 18:46

Ablondiebutagoody · 21/09/2026 16:28

2 cats can live as cheaply as 1

How, by sharing baths and splitting the council tax? 😂

Laura95167 · 22/09/2026 18:51

brainexplorer · 21/09/2026 16:34

If they’re indoor cats then it probably enriches the first cats life significantly to have a companion. Probably the cheaper option over spaying and insuring the first one.

Unless the new kitten is the opposite sex

CopiedMyBlottingBook · 22/09/2026 18:56

EmpressaurusKitty · 21/09/2026 21:09

Me too. And indoor cats, as a couple of us or more have explained upthread, also need neutering because not to do it is cruel, whether intentionally or not.

Not only this, but it's very easy for an indoor cat to sneak out - especially an intact cat that will want to fulfil its sexual urges. An entire female who gets out when she is on heat might come back with unwelcome additions to the household. An entire male will roam until he finds a female, and he will very likely spray in the house - and the spray of a tom cat makes normal cat wee smell like Chanel No. 5 by comparison!

EmpressaurusKitty · 22/09/2026 19:38

When I was fostering cats who went into heat because they were waiting to be spayed, I got into the habit of making sure they were shut in a room before I opened the front door.

But I live on my own in a flat so doing that was far easier than it would be for someone with kids & a house with more than one exit.

Bananacrepewithnuts · 23/09/2026 21:34

ilovesooty · 21/09/2026 16:30

No they can't if you care responsibly for them.

This woman is irresponsible.

Agreed.
Double the cats double the costs.

Aleveldilemma · 24/09/2026 08:02

I think people should have to pass some training or get a licence before they are allowed to keep pets

EmpressaurusKitty · 24/09/2026 08:23

Aleveldilemma · 24/09/2026 08:02

I think people should have to pass some training or get a licence before they are allowed to keep pets

And neutering should be compulsory except for licensed breeders.

If we ever get to the stage where nobody is dumping tiny kittens in bin bags like rubbish, and nobody has a houseful of unneutered cats & kittens riddled with worms & fleas, and kittens aren’t giving birth at six months old when they’re still babies themselves, then we can rethink.

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