There can never be 50/50 between a man and woman as we give birth and they can never compensate for that ever

I'm struggling to understand the 50/50 thing. Everything my dh earns goes into a big joint pot of 'our cash' as does everything i earn. There is no 50/50, he earns about 5 times what I do. Or am i misunderstanding what you mean? Are you talking about 50/50 housework?

Also what is a princess era?

Ok, so what's your solution?

Where has this rant come from today OP?

Do you have a man in your life who is being an arse at the moment?

Or has your niece said she doesn't want you to have anything to do with her choice of partner?

What's with the anger?

I think the pg is nothing compare to the housework, the parenting, the emotional work etc…
I dint have an isdue with 50/50 if finances are similar. I would have if There’s a discrepancy - which could well play in favour of the man these days.

I hope young women like your niece are pushing back on that.

If you put it like that why on earth would any woman have a child?

Presumably for the women who choose to have a child, there's some sort of benefit that outweighs putting themselves on an unequal financial footing?

I've never wanted children, but there really isn't much I want enough to willingly make myself unequal to a man for it.

Nope, still unclear 😂

Don't have children with these men then. Your niece is making a choice. Just like every woman does. We all know once a child is conceived a man can walk away completely and unless he is earning billions, child support doesn't cover half the expense of raising children while being a single mum. Yet women still have children and every day men walk away from them.

Tbf I kind of agree with you, I was horribly sick for most of my pregnancy, I have c-section overhang etc. I know people who have had very permanent changes from carrying a baby and birthing. Theres no real equivalent for men when it comes to having children. Yes all of us age etc but many women will be in some way permanently changed by pregnancy and birth in a way that men aren’t. There is a difference definitely. A man can have no children with not a single sign on his body or psyche, for women it’s obviously different.

That doesn’t mean I don’t think men can be as good as or even better parents than women (very occasionally).

And yes there are men that act like children are cost free because there are no costs bourne by them and they have such a low opinion of women that you may as well be a farm animal who splits the bills with him. Theres a lot of dross outh there but there are also some decent men too. But yes on average I think men are worse human being than women.

I really don't understand what you are getting at. I am sure you are very aware a child's genes come 50 :50 from the mother and father.

Why would I need to be compensated by a man or men for having periods, being able to have children, periods or menopause? I like being a woman. I don’t like how society makes us second class. I don’t like how the power to bring more humans into the world is not being revered but being framed as something done to me for which I need compensation? We are not flawed versions of men.

It’s not impossible. I was sole breadwinner after having kids as are many single mums. I got zero from the father. It wasn’t 50/50 it was 100/0 with me being the 100.

It's also a choice though. A choice that the majority of women make willingly because they want a child. Not a favour they are doing for men.

How would you calculate the amount of financial compensation needed to equal the direct and indirect costs of having a child?

Exactly.

A lot of these complaints are like me saying that choosing a career in the arts has put me at a financial disadvantage compared to going into finance like my mother wanted. No shit. I chose it knowing all that because the benefits of having a job I enjoy outweighed the financial aspects.

Or like me complaining that I'm hungover and tired because I went out all night. Yes and I still chose to go out because the enjoyment was worth it.

Yes to periods and menopause. No to pregnancy (for women in the UK at least) as in 2026 this is a choice rather than something unavoidable.

Get married before having kids then, if you want to be compensated for having less assets due to having kids.
Women don't have to have kids if they don't want them, it's a choice.
50/50 is fine, in terms of childcare etc. If all men did that the gender pay gap would be much less.

All ok? Get out of the wrong side of bed this morning? Or from what I’m assuming from your post: you didn’t get a big enough Gold Star on your back side for giving birth?!

Yes, and would women who had an easy birth (some do!) somehow be less worthy?
And should men who have painful disabilities, but who nonetheless push through to support their wife and child be honoured more?
Many of us go through far worse things than childbirth. Having miscarriages and stillbirths was just as hard for my husband-a million times harder for both of us than childbirth.
And the people (men or women) who abandon their kids and continue to put themselves first after birth are the problem. Whoever looks after the child well (male or female) is what matters. Yes, egg/sperm make the baby, but the people who look after them all their lives matter most.

Do they drill for sperms like they do oil? So no need for mans sperms? 😆

I think she means entitlement.

Her mother's era was the 80s. I had my children then and my DH did his fair share of parenting and housework.

True but even where it is a joint decision, the risk should be acknowledged. Having children will never present men with the same risks as it does women. It’s just a fact. Most couples agree to have kids, DH and I had long hard chats about it. His body has been entirely unaffected (apart from some mild back pain from lugging DC around). I on the other hand pee every five minutes, have saggy boobs (which would have happened anyway with time I guess) a scar and a belly overhang. I’ve have obviously physically contributed more.

You can make the argument that men contribute in other ways etc but Op’s point is that the physical impact of having children shouldn’t be ignored. I think she’s right, when we minimise it it benefits men not women.

Aside from that theres nothing stopping men from being fully equal parents ofcourse.

OK still confused especially about the sperm bank. So you become a single mother with that sperm and this makes you better than the father who you have decided will not be part of the childhood. You have 100% of costs and responsibility - who are you better than?

And in the UK when 18 years old a child conceived through donated sperm will have the right to know the details of their biological father.

Not sure when you think the OP's 'Mother's era' was (I realise she said 'the 80s' after your post) but I know / knew many fine women who would be in their 90s or 100s now, who expected a heck of a lot more.