To think if a 33 year old has kids

That’s fair @OneAmberFinch but personally I’d put that age as much higher than 33.

To be honest though and while I don’t want to sound awful, I grew up in a very deprived sort of area: it was hit hard in the 80s and while it sort of recovered it is still very much a white working class kind of area.

I went back to live there briefly following the death of a parent, around ten years ago now so when I was 34-36. Most of the girls I was at school with had children who were definitely upper primary age or lower secondary. I would say it was normal to start your family sometime between 20-24 and to have your last baby before your thirtieth. Usually at around 27/28.

In contrast where I live now is more affluent and the age of the parents is definitely older. There is a socioeconomic factor to it, which isn’t to say everyone who has a baby in their 40s is wealthy or that everyone who starts their family in their 20s is not, but is is a aspect.

In my NCT group the ages of the first time mums were 42, 40 and 40, 37 and 37 (one of those only just 37) and 34. But NCT attracts a particular type it is said.

I was 37 and 41 when I had my two youngest.
No, 35 is not too old by any stretch!

I was 34 when I had DD. I've been part of a friendship group of six Mums. My friends were 29, 30, 35,37 and 39 when they had their first children. I've known them for 20 years. My other two friends, one was 34 when she had her first, the other 18, but in a second relationship had a third at 37. OP, can you tell me why we were too old.

We all provided a loving, secure home for our children, were able to work if we choose until they were at least 18 so financially had the money to allow them to go to clubs/holidays/have fun experiences as a family. We went to school events/had energy for playdates/sleepovers. We're now 57+, one or two have had health hiccups, but nothing longterm or major and we can still be there for our children if required now they're in their 20s.

Do they want children?

OP's question is quite clear I think. It's not "is it possible for anyone ever to have a kid after 33/35?".

There's certainly a tipping point age where, given that you don't have kids yet at age x, it becomes more likely than not that you'll never have them. This is for all possible reasons combined: not interested, focusing on other interests/career, couldn't find a partner, medical infertility, etc.

This is not necessarily the same tipping point age where, given that you want kids and have a partner and start TTC, it becomes more likely than not that you biologically won't be able to conceive and carry a pregnancy to term.

What a narrow (and incorrect) view.

Don't be daft. A 36 year old is not a grandparent and nor is a woman in her early 40s. Many women don't get the perfect circumstances to have a child at the 'optimal' age.

DC1 at 35
DC2 at 36
DC3 at 39

So, no?

I made my mum a grandma at 38 which is quite shocking really because I’m now 33 and if my children did that to me, I would be completely horrified. I’ve made this crystal clear to them but they’re sensible kids on totally different tracks. To be fair to me I still got a PhD in spite of it all. I had a much more turbulent childhood than they have too and had to deal with lots of trauma.

Would I want more children now though? Probably not. I had my final child at 27. He has SEN and is a runner. I run long distance and started specifically to keep up with him. I imagine chasing after him would be harder if I were a lot older. There are benefits to waiting but also downsides, being an older and less agile grandparent would be one. FIL is 70 which again, crazy to me because my own dad is only 54. FIL couldn’t chase after DS.

No, of course not. I had my ds at 45. Naturally. No assistence or planning 😁

Most of my friends had their dcs in the range 37-42. Careers & house prices !!

Do you live somewhere houses are more affordable OP?

No idea what your question is. Lots of people have babies at 33 or the few years after it

I was 44 when I had my son.

I had my daughter the after I turned 37. I’m 41 next month and would have another if other things were aligned. I don’t feel too old.

Likely? yes

FTMs are usually 30 ish & STMs are 32 ish and most only have 2 dc max.

But I wouldn’t assume someone in their mid or late 30s would stay child free.

I’m sure loads of people assumed I would never have children (so did I tbf.) Finally got pregnant at 39 and had ds at 40. I was extremely lucky to have another child just under three years later.

i didn’t have my first till 36. Have three of them now.

If someone plans to have kids, they will most likely start before the age of 36 - if that is what you mean.

Ohhh lord find a hobby … not making threads for fun

currently pregnant at 38 after one losing my fiancé at 30 and two going through years of IVF & miscarriages. So no not too old, ^^life happens and we do what we can with the time we have.

I'm English, 51, and of course you're not a senior at 53, ffs. I have no idea why you'd think I thought that seniors are people in their fifties. Or why you think I'm American. Senior usually refers to people of state pension age or those who qualify for senior benefits like the free bus pass. I have no idea why you're so offended. Would you prefer to just be called "an old person" when you become a senior? As in "old-person discount"? And do you object to other terms that denote a person's stage of life, like "teenager" or "middle-aged"? Honestly, you are being ridiculous.

So I, at 53 am a "senior" then?

My older kids could have made me a grandmother by now, but my youngest is still at school and living at home. I work and care for my elderly parents.

I do not get any discounts etc. I am very much not a senior, and I know a fair few people much younger than me who are grandparents.

I am guessing you are American.

Eh? What's wrong with that? It's what they're called. Senior discount, senior mental health, etc. It's seen as more respectful than saying old or elderly. I can't believe you wrote "Really?" as if I'd said "batty old person" or something. My late father (died two years ago at age 84) used it often to refer to his generation. It's a very, very common and accepted way to refer to people experiencing what the French call the Third Age. Really no need for a "Really?" at all. I can't believe you're so astonished by that term.

Nah. 43 maybe.

Uhoh not sure what to do with the baby sleeping beside me then...I'm 40